The Fascinating Tissue Box

While visiting my mom the other day, she pointed to a box of tissues covered in a pile of tissues that had been pulled out.  My neice,  who is almost towo, discovered the fascination of the Kleenex box just a few months ago.

When Jenna was in preschool, we had purchased several boxes of tissue to donate to the preschool.  It was a knock off brand – and a knock of quality – unless the actual tissue paper is what we may have been going for.  I like Puff’s.  They’re soft.  They don’t feel like you are holding wood up to your nose as this knock off brand does. 

          I remember when Jenna discovered the tissue box.  How exciting it was for her to reach in and pull out a tissue and have one pop up again.

Unlike Jenna, who would just pull them out by fascination only, Anna would hold each pulled piece up to her nose.   I don’t know where she found so many opened boxes.  I ended up putting four of them on top of the piano.

Houdini Could Toss a Basketball

          We had a bear-sized dog come live with us before we were married and were moving Roland and the boys into the house.  He was an older dog who had come with his own name – but if he hadn’t, we would have named him Houdini as he was an escape artist.

          The first year we lived in Kearns we had gone to a Cinco de Mayo [taste of Kearns] celebration.  The boys (Randy specifically) had wanted to enter Houdini  in a contest but didn’t know what category.  They ended up entering him in the fluffiest – we were among the first to arrive and hadn’t had the opportunity to see the one we knew would take first place.

          Best trick really would have been the best option, but I don’t think the boys had a ball with them (as I recall we had just walked to the High School where the celebration had taken place) otherwise Houdini would have put all the other animals (even more so, their owners) to shame.  For the “tricks” that were performed were not all that impressive – and each animal had to be rewarded for his unimpressive talent – whereas Houdini could bounce a basketball off his nose and didn’t need a reward.  Being able to play with the boys was reward enough.

          Houdini could also catch a baseball in his mouth.  It seemed so odd that this overweight tailless dog had so much talent. From what I have captured on video tape, Houdini always had perfect aim.

          Houdini has been our favorite dog of all the dogs that we’ve had.  We miss him tremendously.

Some of the Places where my Mind takes me

          It’s time to get my hair cut – or at least thinned out.  I feel like I have a heavy scarf draped over the back of my neck.  I have been pulling it back – but some days just don’t seem to matter.

          We’re down to just one car.  Jenna and I have to get up in the morning to leave by 6:30 to take Roland to work.  Jenna stays in her pajamas, wears slippers out to the car, buckles herself in, lies down and throws a blanket over herself. 

          Roland turns the heater on – I usually turn my side down before we arrive to his work (one nice feature which still exists on the car – passenger and driver can adjust to different temperatures) I shut the heater off before completing the journey home.

          We return home one hour before I take Jenna to school.  By that time I have the A/C on.

          Biff and Roland put up the A/C in our living room the other night (on Biff’s birthday actually). We’re expecting rain now.  It always rains after we put up the A/C.  Though yesterday seemed unbearably hot, it’s been quite overcast today.  I see several people out in their yards working – pulling weeds, planting.

          I went out to see my mom.  We used to be rivals when we played word games like Scrabble or Upwords.  Mom was a sore loser, but even a more prideful winner.  It was all in fun. 

         

          That was then.  I continue to play games with her in order to stimulate her brain, but there is really no point in keeping score anymore.  No longer do we share our playful competiveness.   She seems to have lost interest in how to keep score and doesn’t bother looking for points so much as just getting rid of her letters. 

          Seems I need to work harder at getting her to smile or understand a joke.  And we have all repeated ourselves almost as often as she has.  Very little seems to stick with her anymore.  This change is hard on everybody.  And there are some of us who have questioned as to how much longer until I am in her shoes.  (I often wonder if I’ll be there tomorrow – for real)

          I’ve been searching through tapes and taking glimpses of home movies – not really that far in the past.  My mom is more put together and aware of things even just a few years ago more so than now.

          My niece and her husband live in the basement.  They don’t have their own private entrance.  Seems “grandma” is forever locking them out.  And so my niece has learned to always have her keys on her – even if she is just in the yard.

          Just as the weather changes, so do our lives.  Sometimes we can revisit where we were – but often we’re forced to move on or ahead and don’t have the capability of revisiting – not even in photographs.

Incentive Charts

          Trying to get Jenna to pick up after herself has been a chore.  I just don’t understand why it is such a big deal to remove clothes from one’s body and not put them away or put them in the dirty clothes as soon as they come off.  Granted, to take them off and discard them to the floor does take less time at that given moment – but when it builds up – it does take much longer than it would if initially put away.  She’s a smart girl – but she is also very lazy about certain things.

There are actually four or five charts I would like to incorporate – but not

all at the same time.  That would be overwhelming for both of us.  I did have the “Go to Bed on time” chart up, but as there are just a few weeks of school left, and it is her whining that is really grading on my nerves right now, I have changed the incentive chart to “I will go an entire day without whining” I hope there will be enough incentive there.

It helps that her dad is currently enrolled in furthering his education.  He told me that he has to be on the Net at least four times a week to get credit.  So Jenna decided that I needed to make a chart for Roland, also.  And actually it has worked to my benefit – for Roland has already earned six stickers.  Jenna’s competitive.  Her goal is to beat him.  I sincerely hope it works out.

I was familiar with the idea for incentive charts before.  I had used them on the boys when they were in junior high.  I wouldn’t think a junior high student would care so much about stickers – but for some reason it appealed to them.  And it appealed to them to each get more than his brothers.

Ooki certainly didn’t care about the stickers – but I had a chart for him initially so he wouldn’t feel left out.  Tony was jealous of Ooki and jealous of the amount of stickers which Ooki had earned – not because he was competing – it was just his nature to do things – mostly without being told.  So that gave Tony incentive to do more than he would otherwise.

We will be continuing education during the summer.  More charts.  We have to read, write, practice cursive, practice times tables and she really ought to brush up on her Spanish (I’m going to need help with that one) and will put checkmarks or smile faces or something each time we have put in 20 minutes or so on whatever it is.  None of her friends are early risers, so I do not foresee it being a problem.

Hopefully by the end of summer ALL of the incentive charts will be full.  I hope so anyway.

Sunrise, Sunset (a timeline)

Met Roland Dec 31, 2000

                   first date – First Night

          New Year’s kiss on train

Boys welcome New Years with future cousins

three days pass –

 Marriage proposal,  Oh, right

Mother to three boys

I know them better than I know dad

I know them better than dad knows them

Purchase house in Kearns

                   Roland and boys move in

May  -

          Biff’s birthday. 

          toothpaste and laser tag

September

Married

                             Roland, Biff, Tony, Randy –

my instant family

our first Christmas

April 2004

                   Jenna’s born

First mothers’ day

                   Precious moment photo

                             smiling up at brothers

                                                but not for mommy, not for the camera

Jenna grows.

          They all grow.

2005

          All three boys are in high school

                   Jenna starts pre-school during Randy’s senior year.

February 2007

          Biff receives mission call to work at Conference Center

March 2008

          Family portrait

                   Roland with all six of his children

          Tony leaves on a two year mission to Brazil

Mothers’ Day

         

                   Biff and Randy make a gift for mom

                   She is surprised by all the thought

April 2009

          Randy leaves on a two year mission to Portugal

November 2009

          lose house in Kearns,

                             move to West Valley

2010

                   Tony returns

                   He joins the army

                             trains at Fort Knox

April 2011

          Tony and Rochelle get married

                     ten days prior to Randy’s return

Feb 2012

          Rochelle gives birth to Ester

          family goes to Arizona

                             Grandma’s birthday

                                                          dancing

          Biff and Randy on the dance floor

                                      smiling

                                                          dancing

                   enjoying life

May 2012

          Jenna gets baptized

          Randy and Carrie get married

                                      smiling

                                                          dancing

                   starting a new life

Today Biff turned 25.     

No use crying over spilt milk; Time to Move on

          The wedding is now behind us, but still my plate seems full.  I am exhausted both mentally and physically.  And I am certain that I am also experiencing a hormonal imbalance.

         

          I vegetated all day yesterday.  Literally.  I had the boob tube on, but never saw a complete program as I would fade in and out of my slumber.  I hadn’t slept well the prior night.  I often have problems sleeping when I am overly tired.  My subconscious mind always seems to dwell on situations that I can’t change.  It drives me nuts – especially when I am so exhausted.

          Given that and the fact that I had taken a Zyrtec before going to the wedding reception and then again before going to bed.  It must have taken all day before it finally wore off.  At least I hope it’s worn off.

          My brother Corey had tried to be supportive – to both the family (as I had a son getting married) and his partner who was auditioning.  Both had scheduled event for the exact same time.  And he managed to do both.

          When Corey’s partner had finished his audition, both got dressed up and entered the temple grounds to be in family pictures.  They were in a few.  The one with everybody.  The one with bride and groom in front with uncles, aunts, nieces, cousins, friends, just whoever . . .

 Then our photographer asked which family should be photographed first.  I opted for the bride’s family with a lot more people – at least four were under the age of twelve.  I thought it would be easier to keep them there rather than move them around and back again.

          But my family got left on the back burner.  They left and I wasn’t even aware.  So the only photos that they were in were the ones with everybody – though the photographer had taken some of me with Corey and his partner before the bride and groom came out. But we did not get any photos of five that were there on the groom’s side in pics with just the nine of us.

 I felt bad.  And I know it is wrong to be upset about it or dwell on it, but I did get teary- eyed about it.  And when Roland asked if I was catching cold, I just couldn’t hold back anymore.  And I knew it was stupid for me to be crying over something I couldn’t change.  I should have said something sooner.

          It’s over and done with.  But Corey’s partner was tired having had only two hours of sleep.  Mom was antsy – because she just seems overwhelmed with crowds as she’s gotten older.  So they left.  And Corey said they had said good-bye to me.  But my head has been so full this month and I can’t think straight and I didn’t hear them or see them leave.

          There were two photographers – one from each family.  I think Bill was getting annoyed with the other photographer who obviously doesn’t have his years of experience.  She was sweet enough – but definitely not Bill.  He was probably more flustered than I was.

          There weren’t near as many pictures taken of Randy’s wedding as there had been with Tony’s – when Bill was working by himself.  Especially at the reception – where Bill had arrived on time (which doesn’t seem normal for him) but the bride’s side of the family didn’t seem to care or wanted to be bothered with being photographed again.  And the bride and groom themselves didn’t arrive until the time when the reception was scheduled to start.

          Jenna’s dress had gotten dirty – and she wasn’t in the greatest mood.  I don’t even know if she’s aware that Corey’s partner is in town right now, but I plan to take her out to my mom’s house and take pictures myself as he’ll be leaving tomorrow.  And since the dress Jenna wore the other night is not clean, I will be dressing her in another.

          It’s Mother’s Day.  I won’t have to be assisting in the nursery today as the priesthood will be giving all the women a break.

          Last night Jenna gave me an apron she had made – so excited about her gift that she just couldn’t hold it in.

          Now she would like to work on making a gift for Biff – who has his 25^th birthday tomorrow.  It’s been put on the back burner – again.  I so often feel like Biff’s birthday has been lost in the sauce for so many years.  For the most part I don’t think he even cares.  But it would be nice to receive some acknowledgement.

          Mother’s Day has often been put on the back burner, too.  But I think Jenna plans on changing that.

It’s been a Melancholy month; can’t wait until it’s over

I suppose I could just brainstorm my thoughts – which I have – but on paper.  Not on a post. 

            I’ve heard it said that poultry may sometimes run around frenziedly for several minutes after decapitation.  Hence the saying, “running around like a chicken with head cut off” 

          My mind has definitely been elsewhere this month.  Too many events taking place all at once.  Too many things to remember.  I have so lacked in my organizational skills

          Had to find sitters for Jenna on Tuesday and Friday this week; had another meeting with my sibs on Tuesday – something which had been scheduled for well than a month in advance.  Fortunately my sister mentioned it in an email or else I would have forgotten.

          I arrived early – 40 minutes early.  I had left early as I didn’t know the path of construction that would be in store for me and was very surprised when I hadn’t encountered not even one orange poly cone or orange barrel.

          Yesterday Carrie went to the temple for the first time.  I had been invited to attend along with her other guests – Randy had even offered to drive me (as we’re only down to one car which Roland drives on Wednesdays)  But I still would have needed a sitter for Jenna. But I had already told her that I would take her to see a child’s production of “Alice in Wonderland” – a play that she had actually wanted to be in – but it really didn’t fit into our schedule – or budget.

          I thought that I would have rather gone to the temple then to sit through a peewee production of “Alice . . .” – NOT my favorite show.  But it turned out to be really cute.  And I will do a write up on another post.  We rode the bus over to the high school and that in itself was fun for her.  I feel good about having taken her and not neglecting her again.

          So tomorrow is Randy and Carrie’s big day.  In our family it has been traditional for the groom’s family to do the wedding breakfast/brunch.  In the past, each couple has gotten married in the morning and had their meal between the wedding and reception.  As they are not getting married until 1:00 in the afternoon, it will be a breakfast before they are married.  It isn’t practical for us to try and sandwich the meal in between the marriage and the reception in the allotted amount of time.

          Apparently 9:30 is still too early for the bride and her family – but when else are we supposed to do it? Seriously?

I know there are some readers who wonder why I’m even blogging with the wedding being so close.  Most likely I will not be blogging tomorrow though.

It would have been less costly just to have her committed.

          I have two friends who are currently going through the divorce process.  One couple, though hurt, remains civil.  Their plan is to go through mediation.  The other . . . well, she sounds like she has turned into the Maleficent that Roland was married to for seven years.

          I’ve actually known him a lot longer – and have had conversations with her – but not day to day.  She seemed nice.  Perhaps a bit naïve when the two of them were married – someone a chauvinist would marry.  Someone who could be controlled.

          Of course I don’t know all the insides and outsides of their marriage.  I know that she posted to facebook that they were getting a divorce.  I think posting anything to facebook is opening a can of worms.  Her family (or friends) didn’t see it that way when the comments turned into bash and dispute.

          I’ve heard there are mental issues involved – so most of what I read sounded to me like she had turned into Maleficent – Roland’s ex – who I was told at one time had a heart.  Hard to believe.

          I always told Roland that it was too bad that he didn’t have Maleficent put away in some asylum – and certainly there would be costs – but I’m certain that it would be less expensive than what we are seeing now.

          The difference between Maleficent and my facebook friend (who actually shows up as “sister”) is her lack of family support – where as I think my facebook "sister" has family who would fight it out in court if her husband were to have her committed.  He’s got many years of financial hell ahead of him.  Too bad.

          I hope the state won’t be so doofus as they have been with Roland – though I have my doubts.  As with Maleficent (the original) they are certain to believe all the lies of my facebook "sister".  They will issue her restraining orders upon her word of mouth.  They will cater to her every need.  She will be awarded custody and use her children against my friend the way that Roland’s ex has with him.

          I get upset by the whole idea of divorce – especially when it becomes so ugly and there’s a partner who will never let go.  She seeks vengeance.  And every passing year she becomes more and more vile and her poison gets stronger and stronger and the state realizes they made a mistake but will never admit it. 

          Roland’s girls haven’t ended up like Josh Powell’s kids.  I don't know what my facebook friend's condition is. I don’t know the severity of the mental illness she refuses to face.  But hey, I doubt the state will even take that into account.  Aren't we supposed to learn from history in order not to repeat?

          Dear friend who I’ve known for over forty-five years . . . I’m sorry for your current and future situation.  At least she can’t have custody of all your kids – and it seems like the harder she tries to turn them against you, the more she turns them against herself.  I hope the road you are on doesn’t take you to the same financial or emotional hell as we have traveled.  I feel for you.  I’d like to be able to do more for you. I just don't know what.

                                                Love, LaTiesha 

So Much to Be Grateful for

          This month started off with a funeral.  Roland’s eldest sister had passed away unexpectedly.  But our final moments with her were spectacular.  We had gone to visit the family to celebrate mom’s birthday (which I have mentioned in an earlier post.) 

               

We are all so much grateful that Roland was able to return and that we have been able to meet our expenses – though it has set us back in other ways.  We have been blessed.

And yesterday represented new life as Jenna entered into the waters of baptism.  Something she had been looking forward to for well over five months, as we have attended several others.  She didn’t think it fair that all her friends were getting baptized before she was – although that hasn’t really been the case.  (Have I mentioned that my little girl is quite the drama queen?)

The Spanish ward was in charge of the program.  The opening hymn was “Choose the Right” which was sung in English. The opening prayer and first talk were given in Spanish – with translator for the talk.

Ironically, Jenna just happens to be learning Spanish with her schooling.  Each morning she spends the first three hours receiving instructions in Spanish – so she didn’t really need the translation.  She understood the talk.  And I watched her listen with understanding.  And it was marvelous.

Her oldest brother, Biff, baptized her.  What a great experience for both of them, as he had never had the honoring of performing a baptism before.

I assisted Jenna with getting dressed while Roland shuffled those in attendance to another room (there were four primary baptisms for four different wards;  You may wish to refer to this post  if the words ward and primary don’t make sense to you) and introduced two of Jenna’s uncles who I had asked to sing a few primary numbers in order to maintain the Spirit.

A book of Jenna’s memoirs was passed around so that her friends and family could add their thoughts and advice.  And after everyone was accounted for (Biff had taken a little longer at changing and getting to where the rest of us were) a circle of priesthood holders stood around her, and Randy confirmed her a member of the Church.

It was a beautiful ceremony.  And I am so grateful for the outcome.  And for the strong Spirit that we all felt.

Next week we have a wedding.  Busy month.  And it has just barely started.

Would your Parents Help with the Flower Expenses?

          When I was very young – still in elementary school, probably – my dad had strongly suggested that I elope when the time came.  Of course back then I had no idea what that even meant – but as I got older and older, I realized that the elopement thing was sounding better and better.  Weddings DON’T have to be expensive.  But some brides allow things to get out of hand.

          I actually come from a very practical family who has not spent a lot of money on that special day.  Mostly due to a lack of funds – but also because we realize it is just one day and the expenses don’t have to be off the charts.  What’s the point?

          I realize that there are some who have dreamed about her “perfect wedding” her entire life.  I wasn’t one of them.  Getting the groom was the main most important thing.  All else was unnecessary.  Especially when I got older and realized how impractical so much of it really was and is.

          My brother and his wife got married around Christmas time.  The reception hall had been decorated for the holidays.  And Sunny and her family just incorporated those decorations for the wedding itself.  Sunny wore her mom’s dress.  I don’t even remember what food they had – but I’m guessing that it was simple.

          Sunny did have a line. She had chosen two shades of pink for the bridesmaids to wear. Of all existing fabrics she had chosen taffeta – okay, so the whole wedding wasn’t practical.  Half of us looked like circus tents.  It was the one and only time I would wear that dress.

          What’s up with bridesmaid dresses anyway?  To analyze that would have to be a post all on its own.  But let me not lose focus here.

          After Roland and I got engaged, we had changed our wedding date so many times.  There were complications with his ex that I will not even try to explain.  We would make arrangements around other people’s schedule – and you know what?  No date will ever work for all people.  Seriously.  Another great benefit to eloping – no one person would be excluded anymore than anybody else. 

          By that time my father had passed away and my mom didn’t want me to elope.

          We had landed on our umpteenth date for September 18.  We had the marriage license; I had borrowed a white dress from mom (not her wedding dress though – as she had borrowed the one she had been married in) and ten days prior we learned the clergy (bishop) who would marry us would be out of town.  I was in tears.  Really – why all this stress.  If we ran off to Las Vegas, it would be over and done with and I wouldn’t have had to deal with such emotional turmoil.

          The next day I asked my bishop if he could marry us that or the following night.  So the groom, the guests, everybody who was a part of that wedding party got eight hours notice or less.  And you know what?  Everybody who had been invited came.

          We were married at our newly purchased house.  My mom stopped off at the store and purchased a cake that said “Congratulations!” and it worked.  Roland's favorite part about that night was that I didn't have to leave at a certain time; I was there to stay.

          There were still some who believed we should have a reception.  And so a month later we did – for them. We made up our own announcements and passed them out by hand.  I purchased some balloons and teddy bears for our decorations.  We found some appetizers on clearance and used that as our food.  And ward (Church) members rallied around us to assist with our needs. 

It was held in the building where my mom attends Church meetings. It was simple.  There was no line.  Very little expense.  And it worked.

          Before Kayla got married I went with her to a second hand store.  She purchased a wedding gown and veil that she has worn three times perhaps – she had posed for pictures in her wedding dress without her groom – and there are several more – over six hindered more of the bride and groom.

          The line was short.  No bridesmaids in one-time-wear bridesmaid dresses.  But if she had had bridesmaids she would have chosen a practical fabric and pattern that the bridesmaid would actually want to wear again.

          Her “flower girls” wore dresses which were already in closet – posed for pictures but did not stand in line. My family and I assisted in the kitchen.  It was held at the same building as my reception had been.  It was inexpensive.  And it worked.

          And I have been to some expensive weddings that really did have an awesome appearance and commercial feel almost.  And while I have made comment that, “Oh, this is nice.  Yes, it is beautiful” I really do feel a lot more comfortable with simple than with expense.  Which is good, I guess.  Being that expense has always been out of my reach.

          I have two daughters-in-law.  Well, two as of next week. 

My first daughter-in-law comes from a family who has had to deal with financial burdens just as we have.  Rochelle’s needs and ideas were very simple – and it showed.  The layout for the reception was very inexpensive.  Different family members had agreed to assist and/or take over with different parts of the reception – such as food, decorations, the cake, etc.  They held it at the Church (ward building) that she had attended. And it was a really nice reception.

          Rochelle was very willing to elope.  But she didn’t want to hurt her family members’ feelings.  Neither of her parents was in the greatest of health.  She had a simple wedding reception for them.  And her mom passed two months later.  So we have some great memories there with her mom.

Carrie’s tastes are a far cry from practical, I think.  According to Randy, Carrie’s family has already spent thousands of dollars on this wedding.  Thousands!  I cringe at the very thought.  If I had thousands, it certainly would not be spent for a onetime event.  I’d fix up the yard, have a lot more reliable transportation, fix the plumbing in the house (probably the plumbing would be my priority) get my printer fixed . . .

Carrie had asked Randy to ask if we could help with expenses.  Are you kidding me?  Don’t you think if we had the money we would have made the offer?  After all, she’s been to our rather small house before.  She’s seen our embarrassment of a yard. She’s seen what we use as transportation.  She may not know about the plumbing, but still . . . we didn’t spend that kind of money put together on the three weddings mentioned at the beginning of this post.  
Please.  It’s not that I don’t want to – well, I guess I don’t – but overall we really cannot help out with expenses because we just don’t have it.  We've been off and on welfare our entire married lives.  Mostly on it seems.

Randy doesn’t understand why we’re so financially strapped.  Hopefully he will never have to find our first-handedly about the high cost of divorce and what it’s like to hire attorneys and pay court costs and taxes and earn money that we never even see.  (Also more information for another post that will never get written.) Not to mention the economical slump they are calling a “repression”.

I like Carrie.  I do.  But her view of the world is so different from my own.  Different from her mother’s from what I understand.  The kind of girl that Randy would go for.  A trophy wife.  And I hope for both of their sakes that it will last. 

Sunny would not encourage anybody to elope.  She thinks that there should be many memories of that important day and that family and friends should be a part of it.  And I agree.  I wanted family and friends.  I didn’t want hype however.  And hype isn’t needed.  But for many brides it appears that the desire of the material things and show becomes more important than friends, family members, and even the groom. 

I’ve been to some weddings that have just seemed so superficial and showy, I wonder just who they’re trying to impress.  Themselves?  Do they think it’s worth it? And there are those who have been impressed with the results.  I, for one, am NOT impressed with the high cost of weddings.  I’d rather take my family on vacation somewhere.

 Different strokes.  Different folks.  If our finances are like they are now, Jenna’s will have to be simple (unless we can get her to elope)

Creative Solutions

          Whenever I have done a report or written a letter and I want to be specific about conveying my message, I have turned to my brother Corey for his input on how to change my wording so that it flows smoothly like his words always seem to.  My husband Roland does the same thing to me – asks me to type up his reports and change them around to convey his message.  So I asked Corey who he turned to . . . . He hasn’t said.

          I turn to Roland when I need a solution – he is very creative and can come up with answers.  So does my sister-in-law.  Both have such logical approaches and can introduce such awe at the same time.

          There have been times where something somehow didn’t make it into the plans – such as the spoons for ice cream during Jenna’s last birthday.    I told the children that superheroes would be able to find a way to eat without spoons.  So most chose to use their toothpicks – while Jenna licked hers up like a cat (somehow I just don’t see Wonder Woman actually doing that).

          One time (when I was younger) my family went to an amusement park with our cooler in tote.  The plan was for us to have a picnic.  We’d brought chicken, chips and potato salad – whoops.  We’d forgotten the utensils.  My dad’s creative solution was for each of us to dip our chips into the bowl and eat them along with the potato salad.  It is the only time I remember sharing a large bowl with all of my family.

          And then there’s the time when Roland took the boys to a fathers and sons outing.  Somehow they had managed to leave the house with the tent – but not the poles.  Ooki took this picture after my creative spouse came up with a solution on what to use and sent the four boys out to get it.  What a hoot!

          Roland comes up with solutions all of the time with various jobs he’s had, in making temporary repairs until we can financially afford something professional, in displaying food or decorations (this summer I will be posting one about the flag)

          I enjoy the creativity of others and the ability they are blessed with at resolving certain issues.

Boundaries and Languages of the LDS Church

          The words ward and stake refer to the geographical boundaries of those who belong to the LDS Church.  A certain number of members are assigned to a certain building.

          First off there is a chain of command.  Perhaps it might be easier to an individual to compare the chain of authority (but not the religion itself) to a business or military leadership, let’s say.

          The CEO or President does not show up in every store, in every franchise, in every company that she or he has built.  They hire staff who they hopefully communicate to.  They in turn hold meetings at their assigned areas and let their people know what the CEO expects. 

         

          The corporate moves from states to cities – with even more employees representing the different locations within the surrounding areas.  This is how the chain of command operates.  This is how the CEO communicates to his fellow worker.

          In the LDS Church there is a Prophet who is referred as President of the Church.  He in turn has counselors.  They preside over what is known as the twelve apostles who in turn preside over the Quorum of 70’s.

          Each member of the 70 is assigned to preside over certain regions.  A region is a geographical boundary which includes several stakes.  Each stake is divided into wards and branches (a branch includes a much smaller membership than does a ward) who in turn each have a bishop (or branch president) and counselors.  And the chain of command goes through each region, each stake, each ward, etc. The boundaries are included in the Church organization.

          Recently, when we had visited with Roland’s family, I was trying to explain this to one of my sisters-in-law.  Our youngest son, Randy, was also having a similar conversation with another family member.

          In the past I had typed up the address of where we were staying to find the address of a nearby Church – and usually had a choice of locations (as the site brought up at least three surrounding in the area) but this year it gave only one.  I did not question it until we were driving there.  I don’t remember it having been such a long drive the last time we were there.  We had gone to another building in the years prior. But after the meeting started, I realized that it was a meeting where we needed to be.

          The first speaker warned the congregation that even though LDS language is familiar to its members, for many outside of the Church some of our words are a bit foreign (just as most military terms are to me; Tony can use initials and military terms when speaking to Roland and he will understand them, but I will not)

          We refer to the youth Sunday school as “Primary”.  Primary means first in sequence, most important, basic, original and relating to early education.  All of these definitions fit what primary is in the LDS Church.  Our youth are important.  They learn the basics of the gospel.  They have activities in primary.  They sing songs.  It’s an introduction designed for children.  It is inviting to most children, really.

          The teenage group is referred to as Young Men/Young Women.  Back in my day it was referred to as MIA:  Mutual Improvement Association.  (though there is the joke of many youth who seem to be missing in action) It is a program designed to help the youth to stay on course and create goals and achieve them. 

          The programs purpose is to help build self-esteem and awareness and offers guidelines on how to conduct one’s self and how to face daily living.  There are youth activities during the week in addition to the lessons given on Sundays.

          The Relief Society: the oldest and largest women’s organization in this or any other dispensation.  It teaches strength and gives counsel on rearing one’s family, on loving ourselves, on loving one another, on teaching, on learning, and just on rejoicing in being a daughter of God.

          Within the Relief Society is the visiting teaching program.  This program was designed to strengthen the welfare of each sister.  Several sisters will be assigned to visit a certain amount of sisters and/or families in the ward once a month – just to see how they are doing, to report back any concerns, to stay in touch with those who may not be coming to Church for whatever reason.

          There is a lot more to mormonology.  This post doesn’t even begin to touch the surface.  But perhaps I’ve accomplished a few things with a few readers.  Hopefully anyway.