Showing posts with label father-figure. Show all posts
Showing posts with label father-figure. Show all posts

Saturday, November 17, 2018

You Can Call Me Dad



          When Roland's ex was a part of our lives, I remember her sending a "friend" of hers with the girls so that she could keep an "eye on us".  I don't believe she and Karen were good friends.  In fact, I now believe that Karen didn't actually know Roland's ex all that well and was not aware that she was mentally disturbed and has a history of using people.  Karen was with us for only two visitations before she told Roland's ex that she wasn't happy about spying on us.  I don't know the conversation except that she had realized that she must have liked us better than Maleficent. 

          Karen had a daughter named Alexis.  I believe she went to the same school as Pamprin and Francis, and that is how they knew one another.  Alexis took a shine to Roland.  She loved him.  She played with him along with his girls and he treated her just as he had the other too.  Karen could sense that Alexis loved Roland.  He wasn't the monster that Maleficent had wanted her to believe. 

          Our second meeting was at a park where Ooki was to meet a group of foreign exchange students.  They were carving and painting pumpkins.  Frances joined in the festivities, as the art aspect appealed to her a lot more than the playground did.  Roland had escorted Pamprin and Alex to  the playground and Karen and I visited a table near the pumpkins and exchange students.  I laughed to myself as Maleficent had sent her to keep an eye on Roland and wasn't watching either him or Alex - which was fine.  I had enjoyed her company and had hoped that perhaps maybe one day we would be friends.

          When the foreign exchange students had finished their pumpkins, the supervisor of the program asked that they all stand together to have their picture taken.  Francis stood with them and refused to budge.  When it was time to go, Roland called to Frances for a hug.  Alexis came to show her mom something, and Pamprin lagged behind and we all walked to the direction of our cars.  After we Karen and Alex started to walk in the opposite direction of where we were parked, Alexis broke free of Karen and ran behind Roland to give him a powerful hug that had more meaning than Francis' and Pamprin's hugs together.  She needed a positive male role model and Roland was it.  He is a child magnet.  Children love him.  Alex was no exception.  It was the last time we ever saw Alex or Karen.  It may have been the last time Maleficent saw her civilly as well.  Alex, Francis and Pamprin are all adults now.  Physically anyway.

         Flash forward to 2015 - our first year in Oregon.  I had taken Jenna to a birthday party that she had been invited to.  It was the first time that I ever dropped Jenna off without having met the parents - or parent rather.  Shelly lives with her mom, Marva. Whenever Jenna would bring Shelly home - which wasn't often, but there have been some encounters - Shelly would often spend more time talking to Roland than hanging with Jenna.  She would call him "Mr." She loves the attention that Roland gives her. 

          We had invited Shelly and Marva over for Christmas dinner last year and may do so again this year.  They have both been here a lot more lately.  Roland had invited Shelly to have a sleepover last night with Jenna and would take the two of them to the movies today.  However he failed to consult Jenna about his plans and she had made plans of her own. She had planned to support another one of her friends who is having a birthday party - or rather a birthday "hang".  There are several people who love and admire Jenna.  She is accepted by a wide circle of friends - however not all circles will welcome her other friends - such is the case today.  Jenna is well aware that there is already a negative issue between Shelly and the birthday girl.

          Roland's not trying to replace Jenna, nor does Jenna feel threatened, but he has been giving Shelly the attention that she craves just as Alexis had.  He and Shelly fixed breakfast for us this morning.  He had purchased three art pads so that he, Shelly and Jenna could draw - which I know Jenna likes to do - but preferably without his supervision.  He is now out the door on his way to Roseburg to take Shelly to the movie.  She is so in her glory with his personal attention.  In an hour I will be dropping Jenna off at her friend's house and continue on to the Annex to hopefully sell some books and do some homework.  In less than five hours, Roland and I will returning to Roseburg for stake conference.