I Can’t Believe I am 60 now

 Ever since Jaime was born, I knew that I would be 60 years of age at the time my baby graduates.  I am 60 today.  She graduates on Friday. Wow.

The weather has been perfect.  But my allergies have not been.  I haven’t enjoyed the day as much as I would like.  As of now, I don’t plan on attending church tomorrow.  Perhaps I shouldn’t have done so in the first place.  Perhaps I would be over this.  Perhaps.  I still don’t know for sure.

Richard did make a cake for my birthday.  Perhaps he shouldn't have as he has been really good with his diet until today. Jaime and I watched Soul.  I played a few games on the kindle.  Not much celebrating.  

Last Day

             It is Jaime’s official last day of school – though she does not graduate until June 3.  There is a mandatory graduation practice at noon – and she has a concert performance on the first.  So much for the last day.  I don’t think Jaime is ready to give it up.  As I had mentioned before, she only needed two class credits to graduate from SUHS – though she could have theoretically graduated from ORCA last year.  But she is making the most of her senior year and has been assisting instructors with some of the freshman classes.

            She had just turned 11 when we initially moved to Oregon in 2015.  Now look at her.  She’ll be starting college at SOU in the fall.  Sunrise, Sunset . . .

 

Allergies and Phlegm

 I must have fallen asleep with the fan on last Friday night, for when I woke up on Saturday (this was the week when Richard was out of town) I could feel a sore throat coming on. I needed to go to Church on Sunday. There was a training scheduled for the Relief Society. Perhaps I could just go to that and skip the other two meetings. But Jaime wanted to go to her meetings – even though Young Women’s had been on the agenda and she is not as comfortable with it as she is with Sunday School.

I had planned on asking the missionaries if they would be teaching but learned that the primary had been invited to the instructor’s class and asked the instructor if I could be in the class also. There were only three other students in attendance and so I was welcomed.

I had not enjoyed church. By the third hour (training) my head was throbbing and I had wished I had just remained at home. I did not feel like I had been trained and that the meeting had not been worth the effort on my part to be there. I felt crummy. But I had prayed about my decision to be there.

On Monday and Tuesday I took over-the-counter meds every four hours and slept most of the days. By Wednesday I was feeling better – though still groggy. The wind was blowing. I felt like I was in a trance.

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-manage-spring-allergies/

I had learned that Richard had been sick also. I thought it had been allergies and I guess he did too. But perhaps it was really something else. I looked up the symptoms for the latest COVID cases and I had most of the symptoms – but I have had them before. I had not gotten the sinus infection that I felt was coming. That was good.

In 2020 and 2021 public health had set up stations all over the county so that one could be tested for COVID and later on receive a vaccination. I don’t see stations anymore. Appointments have to be made at various places. Walgreens will hand you the test to do yourself. Oh, as though I can purposely hold a stick in my nose for as long or as hard as required. I have learned that just because a test comes back either negative or positive does not make it accurate. My brother and sister-in-law thought that they had allergies but were tested positive for COVID. Could I have COVID? I have not made an appointment.

Yesterday evening I had an attack and sneezed and sneezed and my right eye had watered up. I KNOW that was allergy related. I think all of it is. I don’t know if I have COVID or not. There’s been a lot of stuff going around throughout the nation. Some of it may be COVID related but not all of it is. All three of us have been sick. Jaime stayed home from school only one day. She should not have gone the last two but is insistent and probably getting everybody else sick. It’s her last week. She already missed out on her last stake dance and isn’t willing to miss her last week of school.

Last night I dreamed that Bonnie had a rubber ball stuck in her mouth. Both she and the toy were whining and I had tried removing the ball but was unable to get a grip on it and was afraid that Bonnie would choke. I saw Richard and explained what was happening. He then attempted to assist with retrieving the ball. The noise from the ball and/or Bonnie’s mouth seemed to get louder. It woke me up. I realized the noise was not from Bonnie but from my husband who has been fighting his illness. There was nothing I could do about his wheezing and so I got up.  I was up for an hour before I returned to bed.  My sleeping habits are pathetic!

CBQ#412

 If you could talk with only one person for the rest of your life, who would it be and why?

I would pick my brother, Steven, though I am certain I would not be his first choice.  Steven is not only knowledgeable in a wide variety of subjects, but we share so many of the same memories and feelings and values.  I miss him on so many levels.  I miss talking with him on a daily basis.  I miss his insight that was more instantaneous in person than now.  I miss his ability to understand me when it feels like nobody else does (husband included).  He’s my youngest brother and has been there for me for most of my adult life.  (We did have a falling out for a couple of years – but we’re good now)

https://lattice.com/library/how-to-create-a-culture-that-encourages-communicati

Talking with only one person would be hard however.  I would miss Jaime's voice and singing.  I would miss other friends as well.  I am happy that I don't have to make that decision for real.

CBQ#332

 Did you or someone you know ever talk a police officer out of writing a ticket?

Richard likes to share a memory of a time when his mother was driving.  She had been pulled over and did not know why.  The officer told her that she was being charged for speeding.

“In this old thing?” she asked and was serious.

The officer was laughing so hard that he did not issue her a citation but did give a warning.

CBQ#560

Which is greater, love of one’s parents, one’s children, one’s spouse, or one’s friend?

Love comes in various sizes and definitions.  Unfortunately we do not all define love the same way when it comes to relationships.  My initial response was the parents’ love toward their children but I know for a fact that not all “parents” feel the same way about their children that they would make the ultimate sacrifice for them – even if that means teaching them with “tough love” which is often harder on the parent than the child.

 Some people may have children but have absolutely no parenting skills or feel positive emotions toward their children.  Some people don’t know how as they were never taught themselves.  That goes the same for spouses.  Some will make small sacrifices for the other – such as cleaning the floor or ironing their shirts – it’s a sacrifice when one person does it not because of obligation but out of respect and love for the other. Of course those are just examples of small sacrifices.  Rallying around a person who has changed either mentally or physically due to an injury or aging - one spouse doting on the other.  I have seen several examples of that from both spouses and parents.

So many relationships start based on physical appearance or attraction. That doesn’t mean the relationship won’t turn into a strong love for one another.  I love Ben Wilcox explanations of love and affection found in this video.

 There are obviously different degrees of love.  Your love for your parents or children is not going to be the same as the love you have toward your spouse.  Nor is your love for pizza going to amount to what you may feel toward a person.  Hopefully your spouse is your best friend though you will have so many others that you can call friend.  You may love them all – but still different degrees of love toward each person.  Love is more than affection.  Love takes work on both sides.

https://www.theguardian.com/news/2019/
feb/11/what-is-love-and-is-it-all-in-the-mind

CBQ#559

 What’s the best way to resist peer pressure?

I have never been one to give into peer pressure.  I spent far too much of my life feeling sad or discouraged.  I never had the confidence that I tried so hard to instill in Jaime.  She is good at avoiding negative peer pressure, but does seem to give in to positive peer pressure.  An example of that would be whenever she follows suit when youth in our ward tend to challenge one another to bear their testimonies every fast Sunday. 

Best way to resist?  Live for God and for yourself.  It doesn’t matter what your peers think. Peers should encourage not discourage. 

https://www.verywellfamily.com/negative-and-
positive-peer-pressure-differences-2606643

Home

 Richard did not return last night as planned.  He is currently somewhere in the sky or at an airport waiting to be flown.  He says he’ll be in at noon.  Theoretically I could go get him, but my car is currently with a couple who graciously said that they would go pick him up since I do not drive at night.

He has gone a few days without meds before and has been okay.  He has diabetes.  But he will be okay.  He is probably in better shape than either Jai or I right now.  She is staying home from school for the first time this year.  We won’t be going to the airport.  I am so grateful to the couple who have agreed to collect him.  I think it will be good for them to bond.

Disconnected

         At the end of last month/start of this month, Richard’s only living sister said she had been wanting to go to South Carolina to see their mom.  Richard has too and thought that perhaps they could go together – or else at least meet up.  His sister Jean feels somewhat in the dark because of a feud that has taken place between her and the youngest brother – who has taken it upon himself to become mom’s caretaker – although I think more responsibility has fallen upon his wife.  I don’t know if it’s something she has dealt with before, but Richard’s sister does not understand.  She believes that the youngest brother and his wife are preventing phone calls and supervision.  What a mess.  It doesn’t sound to me as if Jean has ever dealt with dementia.  That’s where there mom is at.

        Last week Richard heard from Jean’s husband. They were in the process of traveling to North Carolina where Al has a relative who had been given two weeks to live.  They figured they would go and see their mom on the same trip as North Carolina and South Carolina are not that far apart.  It was a random decision on Richard’s part, but he decided he would go and join them right then.  Thus we picked up Jai from school last week and headed to the airport to drop off Roland who may be returning home today but may not return until tomorrow. We don’t know.

        Thus Jaime and I have had a reign on the house without Richard’s presence.  No cowboys or Sci-Fi.  Hardly any TV at all (I did watch a few recordings when I had been alert enough to do so) ironically Richard and I have both had colds or allergies or perhaps even COVID – though I don’t know how I would have contracted the latter.

        We’ve both been taking medicines – though I think I have taken more.  I have definitely slept more.  I’ve had tea with honey and am frankly tired of all the liquids that I’ve been sending through myself.  They all come out.  Usually whenever I cough.  I’d rather be asleep.

        I debated on whether to even go to Church on Sunday.  I wish I hadn’t gone.  I wore a mask.  I got so little out of the services.  I got even less out of the training meeting that I needed to attend.  I’ll probably mask up for the meeting that may or may not be held at 4:00 this evening.  Thus far I am feeling better.  I don’t remember ever having recouped this quickly from whatever – but I also have never been so doped up with over-the-counter and home remedies every four hours.

        I’m in a fog as I type this.  My head seems disconnected to the rest of my body.  I don’t even know if any of it makes sense or not.  I guess I can delete it once I have it figured out.

CBQ#324

 Can you remember the address of one of your childhood homes?

         I lived at only one address for the majority of my life.  Just so happens the home where I spent my childhood is also the same as the one my mom had to leave when we put her in assisted living.  She, herself, had lived in that home for over 50 years.  

As I mentioned in this post the streets in Salt Lake are numbered around the temple.  We lived in a non-incorporated area.  Our street number was 6850 South which apparently some neighbors knew as the name “Twin Peaks Drive” though I remember mom telling me she knew of only one family who addressed their mail with the “Twin Peaks” caption.  6850 is going to be so much easier to find than “Twin Peaks”. 

Twenty or thirty years later we were incorporated into the city. New street signs were installed all over the neighborhood.  Our street was marked “6850 South” – it was right after that installation that all business computers received the message that “this landline belongs to a resident living on “Twin Peaks Street” – not the “Drive” that I had grown up with.

It was frustrating ordering things and having the orders delayed because drivers could not find “Twin Peaks” anything.  Oh, duh, city.  If you’re going to enter that street into the computers as Twin Peaks, than why not mark the street itself as "Twin Peaks" instead of 6850 South?  We would tell people “It is 6850 – there is no sign anywhere indicating that it is Twin Peaks.  PLEASE RELATE THIS INFORMATION TO YOUR DRIVERS.  It seldom ever got related. Whenever the drivers did finally show, they were even more frustrated about it than we were.

 

 

 

 

CBQ#193

 How much of a people watcher are you?

 When we lived in Salt Lake I watched people all the time.  Mostly while waiting for the bus or the train.  I would watch people in cars – observe their expressions.  Share emotions with those around me – seeing the looks they would give to one another or to the surroundings.  

https://www.sltrib.com/news/politics/2021/02/25/lawmakers-unveil-massive/

I’ve also observed patrons at a mall.  I’ve never done it to be nosy – only to make the time pass.  It is often fun to pick up an expression of disbelief or wonderment.  I don’t seem to do it so much since I’ve lived in Oregon.  I think because I’m observing nature.

My Answers to "The Complete Book of Questions"

 Richard and I had gone to Roseburg yesterday to run some errands.  Just before returning to Myrtle Creek, he took me to a used book store which he has gone to quite often.  He purchased four books and I got two.  One was a Complete Book of Questions.  Another journal or conversation prompter.  I have exhausted the dashes (mentioned in this post) and am now taking a new approach – though I doubt I will be posting all 1001 QA’s. 

  

CBQ#314 & 316

 

How many bones have you broken? How many times have you had stitches?

 

        I have not broken any of my bones.  I have experienced torn ligaments and tendentious (here) but no broken bones – at least on myself.  My brother, Patrick, broke the same arm at two different times.  The first time was my fault.

        My mom had dropped my brother and me off at my cousins’ house to spend the night. I thought it would be fun to jump from the closet to the bed – or perhaps it was the younger of my two cousins who was the instigator.  Patrick and Michelle seemed a lot more cautious while Ross and I were the adventurous ones – often inviting trouble – but not intentionally.

        So three of us of us were enjoying ourselves and Patrick just observed.  We finally were able to get him to work up the courage to jump.  He finally made it to the closet.  I pushed him out so that he could enjoy the fun (or maybe he was just taking too long; so many years ago, I can’t remember) only my push made him fall between the closet and the bed and he landed on the floor and broke his arm.  I imagine he started wailing – which put an end to our fun.

        Mom said when she came to pick us up, our worried Aunt Fern greeted her at the door – not wanting to let her in until she was able to break the news to her so that mom would be prepared.  Several years went by before Patrick had been goofing off in the back of our neighbor’s pickup.  I wasn’t there so not sure of the details but heard that he somehow managed to fall out of the truck and landed on that same arm he had already broken and had to wear a cast.

       

        Although I had never broken any bones, I have had to deal with getting stitches.  Long before Patrick’s broken arm, I’d been spinning around the living room and ended up losing my balance and wacked my face into a corner of the end table creating a gash between my forehead and right eye.  I don’t recall how many stitches my mom said I had to have.  There is no visible scar although to this day my right eye appears to be significantly smaller than my left as there is more skin folded over my right eye than my left.

Thoughts for my Journal part 2

          Sometimes the chickens behind us will fly to various branches of the cherry tree.  They will roost there for a while.  Bonnie will often climb the hill to watch them in hopes at least one will fall into our yard.  I don’t know if they were in the tree of Friday night, but evidently the storm knocked at least one into our yard.  

    She’d been clucking all night.  I guess she was scared and wished to return to her own yard.  I would have not anything about it except for Jai and I left the house on Saturday via the back yard – and there was a white chicken near the door.  Thankfully, Bonnie was not behind us or the white chicken would now be a corpse in my yard.

         Jaime and I had used the back door in order to dodge Bonnie.  I took Jai to the hair salon.  We also went to the store to get some clips for her hair. 

I was concerned about the weather, but the rain did cease long enough for prom night to end.  Jai always looks beautiful, but that night she looked stunning. 

         She and her friends met at the Grand Victorian and took a limo to Roseburg.  They initially went to Red Robins – which is always so crowded but ended up at Denny’s which was not.  When they returned to the Grand, the limo driver pulled into the lot so others could see just who was getting out of the limo.  Jaime thought it was hilarious as she dubbed those getting out as "the school nerds". She said it was really fun. 

              Last week the bishopric secretary stopped by Richard’s classroom to tell me that I was needed.  I was to talk with a member of the bishopric and was told that the Relief Society presidency was being released and as I was part of that presidency, I would be released.  I was told I had been chosen to accept the calling of ward RS secretary.  Relieved that I had wasn’t or hadn’t been called as president I accepted the position of secretary. The counselor told me the name of the new president and swore me to secrecy that I would not tell anybody else.  I didn’t.

         Instead of our usual Tuesday 10:00 meeting we had decided to do lunch as a last hoorah.  Our former president was ecstatic to released.  The second counselor seemed to have mixed feelings and was the only one kept in the dark as to any hint of the new presidency.  Apparently the former secretary had the names of each member of the new presidency. We ended up trading positions in presidency.  She blabbed out of excitement I suppose.

         The change of presidency was announced in yesterday’s sacrament meeting and we were set apart before Relief Society started.  It was kind of a cool way to start off the meeting.  We were very low in number.  I counted 15 sisters seated aside from the presidency. 

         The Elders had prepared a nice mother’s day treat for us.  They had set up tables adorned with tablecloths and a marigold for each chair circled in the center of the table along with this thought.

 

         I don’t remember having had mother’s day fall so early in the month before – but yet I had three reminders pop into my feed along with this reminder that happened on a Friday.  Rochelle had sent me a link for the opportunity to attend their ward so I could hear the kids singing in their program.  Only it turns out our wards take place at the very same time and did not get the link until after the fact.  Tony called and Emma and Eliza sang over the phone.  That was nice.

         Hope that all my readers enjoyed mother’s day as well.

Thoughts for my Journal

          I cannot believe tomorrow is Mother’s Day.  The weather isn’t speaking volumes of how Mother’s Day has looked in years past.  Yesterday we had sun showers all day.  The rain has been pouring all night and this morning.  Not to mention the hens have been cackling.  I can’t sleep with that!  Nobody rescued them from whatever they were cackling about nor did the rain drown them out as they seemed to be louder than the pounding rain.

https://funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/1577805/Chicken/

         I must have slept at some point – and hard as I had another weird detailed dream.  I don’t know where Richard and I were or why.  The neighborhood was not one that I remember.  Somehow we got separated and I went to a house in which I know the woman but chose instead to go to the house next door to wait for Richard when I heard his voice inside of the first house.

         I went to the door and was greeted by one of the woman’s relatives.  I had remembered meeting her before  and apologized for my interruption.  I was led to another room that somehow continued to get larger as I looked around and saw many people – some eating food and visiting while others sat with dark expressions giving off vibes that they really didn’t want to be there.

         I sat down and observed and spotted a couple from my mom’s ward who I have not seen for almost twenty years.  I went up to them to ask how they were doing.  They didn’t seem to recognize me.  I said that we had lived on the same street when I was living in Midvale.  Some facts were distorted in my dream, but I somehow woke myself up remembering more details – and what I could have said.  Like I had served in Young Women’s with their niece and how we had dressed Tom and the bishop up as Ladybugs.  I also thought about the time when I was pregnant with Jaime and Pam and Elena had offered to throw me a baby shower (which Jaime attended when she was almost two months old).

         I have no idea why I would have dreamed about them. 

 

Jaime has her prom tonight. We are going to the salon to have her hair done.  I hope the rain doesn’t damage.  I really hope she will enjoy herself and have positive memories of the night.

Tomorrow will bring some interesting meetings.  More on that later.