More Patience, Less Judging

     It’s taken me YEARS to not become offended by the actions of my children.  I have one who could never sit still, one who would sulk, one who is considered gifted – he tends to get bored very easily.  Jaime figets.  I never considered her as having ADD or ADHD

screenshot of Google response

     I knew the oldest two had it but hadn’t considered the other two might have had it as well.  There are different signs, symptoms if you will, that one may experience that others may not and vice-versa.  There are countless websites which address these issues.  Some provide quizzes and council.  

      ADD was changed to ADHD in 1987  (reference) 

which is the year our oldest was born.  When I first met Richard the eldest boy had difficulty sitting still – or sitting at all.  He reminded me of a caged animal.  Over the years he’s gotten better at placement but still seems unfocused at times and is constantly misplacing things.

Our second son is a hoarder. I did not see any referencing to hoarding.  It is something he did when he was in junior high and still as an adult with four children.  He has always lacked focus.  He’s always dragging his feet and forgets things the moment he thinks of them.

I used to give him a paper to write his questions down as he thought them up. Sometimes it worked.  Not always. He isn’t very organized.  He is the one Richard nicknamed Donald Duck because of his random flares at the stupidest things. 

 My youngest has always been advanced academically whereas the other two tend to struggle.  He gets bored easily and recycles material things as though money is no object.  He has lived in seven different houses (or apartments) during his marriage of almost twelve years.  I was actually surprised when he announced he was getting married as I didn’t believe he was able to make a commitment.  He hasn’t been dedicated enough to any one company that he’s worked for – not enough to continue working with them but will find employment elsewhere (hence the moving around)

None of them seem to have the greatest listening skills and procrastination seems to be a major part of their personal life.  Jaime doesn’t procrastinate, but she does like to keep her hands busy while someone is talking.  Both she and the youngest boy are outgoing and well-liked whereas the oldest two are not outgoing.

     I probably have and have always had symptoms of ADD myself – though now it could just be classified as an aging thing.  But I have ALWAYS been a daydreamer.  My listening skills have not been the best either because of my daydreaming. 

     How much better my relationship is with them when I don’t react to what I often found offensive but respond with a knowledge that it is not their fault.  They are sensitive and I have been. 

This was shared on facebook; I do not
have a reference for original source