Last week I
had been asked to prepare for the Relief Society lesson in case our instructor
did not show. There was a high
probability that I would teach – which was fine. In the summer of 2018 I had asked to be
released from my position with teaching primary and had hoped to be called as
an instructor in RS – not a part of the presidency.
I enjoy
teaching for the most part. I have also
enjoyed most of David Bednar’s conference talks – though this last one from
October didn’t seem to resonate as strongly as some of the others. Melodie had given me four days notice and I
played the talk each day. I printed the
talk – marked what I believed should be emphasized. Prayed a lot but never felt adequately
prepared as I have been with other lessons.
I had hoped the Spirit would lead me.
I fortunately
had a good amount of participation – particularly from Carli who had implied
that I was doing an amazing job. I didn’t
feel like it was amazing. Okay perhaps
but certainly not amazing.
We each feel
the Spirit in a different way. For some
He is more powerful to others. Perhaps I
was teaching by the Spirit – though I wasn’t feeling it. I remember saying something about the desire
I had for the Spirit to work with me and put words in my mouth that I wasn’t
even aware I was saying. I remember a
few times when I had felt the Spirit that strongly when hearing blessings said
by God through various individuals. I
made the comment that I knew it was God as the one giving the blessing did not
talk that way - he was kind of a goof.
Yesterday a
sister came up behind me as I was making my way to the parking lot to make
certain Richard was waiting for me still as Jaime was already gone. Tori asked me what weeks I teach and I said
that I had just been filling in and don’t normally teach the lessons. She seemed disappointed and asked me to be
certain to contact her the next time I give a lesson as she had felt the Spirit
very strongly and felt a recharge in her system that she had been yearning for
a while.
As I made my
way to the car I started crying. Touched
to tears. How grateful I am to have learned
that the Spirit had indeed been a part of my lesson even though I hadn’t felt
Him nearly as strongly as Tori had – or perhaps more. I didn’t feel drained like those that I know
spoke by the Spirit had felt – so I don’t know if He had taken over my mouth at
all. Maybe.
I had 25
minutes left on my lesson when I had glanced at the clock. I thought only 10 minutes had passed before looked
at again. Class was over. I was stunned. So perhaps some miracle had taken place that
I was unaware. Feeling Grateful that
Tori had felt Him and shared her experience with me. I told her I’d be willing to converse with
her anytime.