My mom has always had a lousy sense of direction – at least since I’ve known her. Improper medication or improper amounts due to failing health and aging does not help matters. She’s always been an okay driver – not exceptional. Perhaps even good at one time – now? I think my mom behind a wheel is rather a scary combination.
But then again having me behind the wheel when the sun is streaming over dirty windows – also scary. And to top it off – send me to unfamiliar roads. It’s like Lucy Ricardo driving Ethel Mertz. (For those of you who have no clue what that statement even means, I encourage you to go to YouTube and click on “I Love Lucy” – any episode, doesn’t matter. It should help you to understand my comparison)
Mom and I have actually had quite a few Lucy/Ethel moments – like the first (and only) time we attempted to wallpaper the bathroom – figuring it was the smallest room – and how long does one spend in that particular room anyway?
The wallpaper itself was truly loud. Big huge flowers in a variety of colors. And bright. One could walk past the bathroom and attempt to flip the light switch thinking that the light had been left on but never turning off the glare – which only became even brighter when the lights really were turned on.
Have you ever been in the tub when suddenly the wall paper joins you? It was quite obvious in many ways that those who had hung it were definitely amateurs. As I recall the bathroom had to be redone after only a month.
Recently I had to take my mom to the Driver’s License Division. A specific DLD – one that might as well have been in another county considering the route we took to get there. Over half the roads had not existed ten years ago when I had last driven there (or that general area rather) and was more familiar with where the roads went – or at least thought I did.
What an adventure! I detailed my day in three pages and emailed it to my sibs and family to make them aware. Some laughed – I’m guessing Corey shook his head in disbelief with another concern: perhaps someone ought to review his sister’s driver’s license as well. And I’m sure if the DL workers could have seen me driving on the road they would have had me retest as well.
I’m not saying I’m a horrible driver. I try to be careful. I don’t answer my cell phone – I take the slow roads and back ways. I avoid traffic as much as possible. And I don’t drive at night. But throw me into a foreign area without a GPS and it’s pretty chaotic.
And then there’s Roland, who for the most part has a keen sense of direction, who can drive somewhere for the first time and make it appear as though he drives there on a daily basis. I admire that. I can make my routine travel appear as though I’m driving for the first time. I am Lucy Ricardo.
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