Tired of Being Tired

 

I have always had poor sleeping habits – ALWAYS

Well, perhaps I did okay in the hospital right after I was born.

Mom says I was always asleep.  Every time she wanted to hold me

I was asleep. 

She said I was never awake during my time at the hospital

and says that after she brought me home

I was awake for the next five years. 

Slight exaggeration – but not much.

Mom said they had gone to San Francisco during a four day weekend.

Keith was just a newborn.  He always slept.  He was a good sleeper.

Actually quite the opposite of me.

Mom said I was awake the entire time during the drive there

and when they stopped at a hotel to get some rest,

they really didn’t as one of them had to stay awake with me

to make certain I didn’t take off or play

in the toilet or whatever they thought they needed

to stay awake with me for.

Mom said I finally killed over one afternoon in San Francisco.

Everybody else moved into the kitchen and talked in hush whispers

so as not to disturb me.

She said I slept for three hours and that was the only sleep I had

 during the entire trip.

When I slept at home, she read.  Never vacummed.

We didn’t even have traffic in our neighborhood.

I got used to the quiet. 

My brother had me around.  I’m assuming I made noise and

was not quiet.  He learned to sleep through the noise. 

But I never did.

It’s rare when I sleep heavy, but I have on occasion. 

Except for this month.

I have had a blah sense of fatigue –

which actually mirrors the skies we’ve had this month.

I don’t recall such a gloomy December.

How wonderful it is to have lights to

stand out in the dismal air.

We’ve had rain and fog. 

Some days we get two hours of sunshine,

but then it disappears

My husband is working a seasonal job

with odd hours.

Perhaps after the new year I will be

able to sleep better.  I hope so.

Joy and Light

        There were a handful of people gathered in the chapel yesterday.  A man had died and his caretaker had decorated the chapel so beautifully.  She brought this picture that she keeps in her office.

    Those who spoke paid beautiful tribute to a blessed soul who had always found the joy and light and in return he shared.  It did not matter that he had physical challenges which had slowed down his motor skills.  He smiled and yelled "touchdown" when he wanted others to know he was enthusiastic about whatever it was - church, football, socializing . .  he had a light and it shown brightly.

    It had become more than just a client/caretaker relationship.  She invites all to be part of the family.  She makes each feel loved and of value.  I am so blessed to be around her enthusiasm often.  

    I didn't know him as well.  But I did feel his joy and his light.

Two More Songs

both by Brandon Heath

Let There Be Music!

 My two favorite Christmas songs this year:

Frozen Honda

          “Where the Red Fern Grows” was released in 1974. I remember my mom having taken my two brothers and me to see the movie in December. I don’t know if dad was working late or just uninterested but he was not with us. 

          My mom had driven the orange Honda – not a practical family car - but there weren’t the restrictions of where children sat in the car. I would imagine that either Keith or I had sat in front and the other two were in back.  I would have been twelve, Keith ten and Steven would be four in latter March.

          After the movie had ended we returned to our car in the frozen and foggy parking lot.  I don’t know if the key to the door turned or not – I’m thinking not.  We sent Steven in through the hatchback to see if he could unlock the door for us – which he did.  But the door still would not open.  So Keith and I crawled through to assist.  The doors would not budge.  They were frozen shut.  My mom, who was four to six weeks short of giving birth to my sister, crawled through the hatchback as well.  Right now it just seems so unreal that she was able to do that.

What a memory!

That Was Different

 

          Richard and I had a few errands to accomplish – in the great big city of Roseburg – on a Saturday.  I took my tablet so I would have something to do while we stood in line.  There were no lines.  Not much in the way of foot traffic or even car traffic.  I was surprised.

          We first went to Staples.  I have NEVER EVER seen the store as empty as it was today.  First Saturday in the month of December.  I was floored.

          Next stop the UPS store – unwrapped framed picture art – more (way more) than Jai and I had spent on November 30.  Also a Saturday.  We were told we had missed the line.  No waiting there.  We were helped in less than a minute.

          There is an area on Garden Valley as one goes from Fred Meyers toward the I5 ramp where a group of people with picket signs stand and promote whatever issue at hand – usually a pro-Trump or whatever he is currently supporting.  Do they really think the drivers have the time to read all their signs.  Usually I don’t even look at them as I so disagree with what they represent.

          Only today the tables had turned.  The demonstrators held signs to promote democracy and anti trump.  Wow.  I told Richard what I had seen (the last sign hand-written flip trump - only it didn't really say FLIP) and he made the comment that most of them who were out there had probably voted for Trump.

          I don’t know many people by name who have admitted the error of their ways having supported Trump for more than twelve years.  I keep on looking to some facebook friends to admit the error of their ways. 

          Instead of getting on the freeway we went to the end of Garden Valley to pick up some clothing items at Coastal.  I don’t know how crowded Coastal was.  Parking lot seemed to have less wiggle room than did the store itself. Their inventory is so smashed together that it’s a wonder that any normally structured human can fit through – let alone the overweight ones.  And forget about trying to push a cart through – at least in the clothing department – which is the only place we were.

          We’re home now.  The ward Christmas party started half an hour ago. We did not attend as  Richard is tired.  I expect that he is taking a nap in front of the TV.  And I haven’t been feeling well or sociable.  Jaime is spending the day in Ashland.  Good for her. May she she blessed with not have to wait in any lines either.

Learning from Puzzles

 

I LOVE word puzzles –

I’ll play Pictograms on my tablet.

Pictograms is a cryptogram puzzle

With pictures to assist. 

For example I figured out mics and guitar

Based on the picture

But had no clue for the letter for the green box.

My and by were the only two

two letter words

I could think of. 

I had already used the M

and the B didn’t make sense

though I tried it anyway.

In Pictograms I have three attempts

Before I have to start over the entire puzzle.

But I had over 60 hints I hadn’t used.

I had to look up XY because 

I didn’t know what it was.

This morning I played Phrasel by myself –

Though Jaime and I usually do it together.

I had to look up the phrase as it is one

I’m not familiar with

We Used to Have More People

 

The church congregation seems to look smaller – not near the attendance we had when we first moved in.  Some people have moved on either by U-Haul  or death.  Sometimes both.

When we first started out our journey in Oregon, there was a Book of Mormon class offered on Tuesday nights.  Relief Society activities were also on Tuesdays.  Sometimes it would frustrate me to have both scheduled on the same night. 

The missionaries serving in this area would teach the Book of Mormon class.  The class was well attended – or so I believed.  Over the course of the years they changed “The Book of Mormon” into “Come Follow Me” – the missionaries were no longer required to teach as the subject of the Old Testament, for instance, was not their forte and may have taken extra time away from what they really needed to be doing.  And so members would take turns teaching –

I think we did well in the beginning – under the ward missionary leader.  We met on Thursday afternoons as I recall.  We had a pretty good turn out – but after the mission leader moved to another state, the class seemed to taper down until finally it was cancelled due to the lack of interest or commitment.  The last one to teach the class has also moved to another state.

I miss that extra class.

The Moving Tree

 I believe Bonnie likes when the 

Christmas tree skirt appears

She decides that it will make a fine bed.

It wouldn't be such a problem except

whenever she moves herself

she moves the Christmas tree as well.

Some of our ornaments are breakable!

Unexpected Growth

 Often times

during the summer

the flowers seemed

either withered or

non existing.  I

didn't blame them.

It was hot!

But now there are

a few brave flowers

that have grown in the 

35-45 degree cold.

Go figure.

Feeling the Spirit

           Last week I had been asked to prepare for the Relief Society lesson in case our instructor did not show.  There was a high probability that I would teach – which was fine.  In the summer of 2018 I had asked to be released from my position with teaching primary and had hoped to be called as an instructor in RS – not a part of the presidency.

          I enjoy teaching for the most part.  I have also enjoyed most of David Bednar’s conference talks – though this last one from October didn’t seem to resonate as strongly as some of the others.  Melodie had given me four days notice and I played the talk each day.  I printed the talk – marked what I believed should be emphasized.  Prayed a lot but never felt adequately prepared as I have been with other lessons.  I had hoped the Spirit would lead me.

          I fortunately had a good amount of participation – particularly from Carli who had implied that I was doing an amazing job.  I didn’t feel like it was amazing.  Okay perhaps but certainly not amazing. 

          We each feel the Spirit in a different way.  For some He is more powerful to others.  Perhaps I was teaching by the Spirit – though I wasn’t feeling it.  I remember saying something about the desire I had for the Spirit to work with me and put words in my mouth that I wasn’t even aware I was saying.  I remember a few times when I had felt the Spirit that strongly when hearing blessings said by God through various individuals.  I made the comment that I knew it was God as the one giving the blessing did not talk that way  - he was kind of a goof.

          Yesterday a sister came up behind me as I was making my way to the parking lot to make certain Richard was waiting for me still as Jaime was already gone.  Tori asked me what weeks I teach and I said that I had just been filling in and don’t normally teach the lessons.  She seemed disappointed and asked me to be certain to contact her the next time I give a lesson as she had felt the Spirit very strongly and felt a recharge in her system that she had been yearning for a while. 

          As I made my way to the car I started crying.  Touched to tears.  How grateful I am to have learned that the Spirit had indeed been a part of my lesson even though I hadn’t felt Him nearly as strongly as Tori had – or perhaps more.  I didn’t feel drained like those that I know spoke by the Spirit had felt – so I don’t know if He had taken over my mouth at all.  Maybe. 

          I had 25 minutes left on my lesson when I had glanced at the clock.  I thought only 10 minutes had passed before looked at again.  Class was over.  I was stunned.  So perhaps some miracle had taken place that I was unaware.  Feeling Grateful that Tori had felt Him and shared her experience with me.  I told her I’d be willing to converse with her anytime.