More Emotions and Light the World

               Three hours after my last post I had gone from hurt to angry – which is not a cool emotion either but I would rather be angry.  I don’t have to deal with mucus or go through tissues when I am angry. In my last post had said that with each “fuel” added I have relived past emotions believing I hadn’t learned anything. However I have gone through the “stages” a lot quicker this time than in years past.  Before I had gone to bed I had convinced myself that I no longer care.  I’m not saying that’s a good thing.  But I am happy to feel this way as opposed to sobbing uncontrollably.  I also realized my poor reaction may have been due to a lack of sleep. I have been able to sleep much better when I am no longer emotionally invested.

            I believe that God experiences emotions such as joy, anger and sadness.  God is immortal.  He may cry but I don’t believe that he has to deal with mucus or tissue. I’m a mortal who has shed thousands – possibly even millions of tears.  I don’t want to cry anymore. Lots of healing to be dealt with still.  As I was writing Jenna shared two really great quotes on how I feel vs. them:

What’s motivating to you may be crippling to others – Victor Lineo.

The same boiling water that softens the potato makes the egg hard

Jenna and I had watched the movie “Big” and it felt so good to laugh. I remembered the baby corn but had forgotten about the celery he returns after licking off all the filling.  It has been a while since I had watched “Big”; I don’t know if I had laughed that hard whenever I had watched it before.

             Before “Light the World” started, Jenna wrote down what it is she wanted to do for each activity.   

For December 17 she thought it would be fun to go to McDonalds and pay for the order of the car behind us.   Jenna’s food order wasn’t ready and so they asked for Roland to pull forward – which he did.  So the payment was not anonymous.  

On Friday I was supposed to have a meeting with the RS presidency, but the meeting did not happen.  We sorted and made up food boxes and added the presents we had wrapped two days before.  After I returned home we connected with my middle son and read two stories to his two daughters

We also sang Rudolf with them and then Jenna and I sang "Happy Birthday" as I thought today was Rochelle's birthday.  I was a month early.  Oh, well.

          Yesterday Jenna decided to try her hand at once again paying for the car behind her.  She and Roland had gone to Roseburg and had stopped off at Taco Bell on their return.

 

         Instead of  going to a nursing home, Jenna decided to tie a note to a helium balloon that indicated the reader is loved and has value and encouraged the receiver her to find her on instagram – provided the receiver has instagram. Jenna released the balloon into the air last night. 

         I don’t know how far it may have gotten but suspect it’s somewhere on the ground in Oregon as it rained last night.  I hope that the message may still be readable.  

A Week Without Posts

          I think I have mentioned both Roland and Jenna have had some nasty colds, but I seemed fine until Saturday - the 10th.  I had gone to the church as the presidency were holding interviews for those who are visiting teachers.  I could feel a sore throat coming on.  Even when I agreed to teach Relief Society only eight days later.

          I went to church on Sunday, the 11th.  I did not stay for choir because I didn't want to strain my throat.  Last week I did a lot of napping (cough medicine knocks me out) and preparing for both primary and RS lessons.  I also participated in a class discussion on a topic that I didn't fully understand.  I took the assessment (midterm) and apparently turned in my discussion notes instead of the assignment.  Brilliant.

          My lesson for the Relief Society went rather well.  I wish I could say the same for my primary class. We reviewed the last couple of weeks and I started my lesson by introducing the class to Lot.  Carly interrupted me several times with non-gospel related "concerns".  She had brought snacks for everyone and wondered if she could pass them out.  While I commended her for her desire to share with the class, I also pointed out how inappropriate I thought it was for her to continue interrupting my lesson and reminded her that it was actually a short lesson but I would have to get through it before she was allowed to pass out snacks.  

          I also continued to remind the class that perhaps one day we will meet with Danny's class to play a game and wouldn't that be awesome if our class was able to provide more correct answers than hers.  That seems to work better on the class as a whole than the snacks or the ribbons.  The passport has been working out well for us - though I have not used it with any of my "Abraham" lessons.

          Tina was trying hard to hang onto my every word.  I really appreciated that and told her mom so when she greeted me after I had given the lesson in Relief Society.

          Yesterday was definitely not my best day.  It felt as though I was agitated about every little thing.  First off there was the topic discussion for my class:

これが会計を理解する方法です。 私は間違ったキャリアを間違いなく選んだ。 私の夫は私が仕事を取れると思っています - Я просто не понимаю. Все это так чуждо мне. В любом случае, перевод может быть неточным. У меня есть последователи из России, которые могут прочитать эту часть. Приношу свои извинения за любые нарушения вашего языка. Это не намеренно. Я просто пытаюсь продемонстрировать, насколько иностранный учет (особенно предмет акций и облигаций) мне кажется대해 이해하고 있을지 모르지만 나는 그렇지 않습니다. 일본어, 포르투갈어, 아랍어, 회계. . . 내 얼굴에 벙어리 표현을 참조하십시오

題ありません。ムーディーズ・インベスターズ・サービスとスタンダード・アンド・プアーズ・コーポレーションは、公的債務問題の格付けを提供している。قد يكون لديك فهم لكل من هذه الشخصيات ، لكني لا أفعل. اليابانية ، البرتغالية ، العربية ، المحاسبة. . . انظر التعبير الغبي على  私はバイナリコードを読むことができなければ問題になるでしょう - 私はできません01010010 01100101 01100001 01101100 01101100 01111001 00111111 00100000 00100000

This may not be an accurate translation.  Doesn't matter.  I can neither read nor understand what it says.  That is how I see accounting.  I just don't understand so many terms.  I am constantly looking up words in the dictionary or accounting glossary and then looking up more words to understand the dang definitions.  Awwhhhh!!!

          I received a  notice in the mail describing a problem I have already addressed several times.  Obviously it hasn't been resolved.  More hair pulling.  Can't communicate with a machine.  Doesn't understand me.  I don't know WHY it asks for my account number.  Whenever I finally get a human, I have to provide my account number again.

          First time the machine says it will allow me through, it claims there is a 15 second wait.  It was longer than 15 seconds before I was cut off.  I call again.  After going through all the rigmarole and hair-pulling for the second time, the machine says I have a minute wait and cuts me off again.  What the hey?  Come on!!!  I storm up an email - which I decide to send to my husband before sending it to customer support - for I know that I'm angry, and although I do wish to express my annoyance, I don't want to be so unkind that they don't want to return my call just to be hung up again.  He tries.  The wait is 7 minutes.

          Meanwhile, I need to call the mortgage company to let them know that we have been contacted by our insurance agency to let us know that mortgage and insurance haven't seemed to make a connection.  Oh, great.  Another problem that may get me fired up.

          "We're sorry.  We are experiencing high volume call.  You will be on hold for 20 minutes."  What????  At least the last company that usually doesn't hang up on me does usually give me the option of calling me back.  And they actually do.  I go to their website on their suggestion.  I fill out their form and write a message.  There is no send button!  I have filled out their form and cannot send it.  What kind of a scam is this.  Now I am livid!!!

          I knew I needed to calm down.  I knew that I wasn't in the correct frame of mind to post a blog.  I still have to figure out my discussion topic.  I still have to call the mortgage company.  It's a wonder I'm not bald. 

          Stay tuned for "St. Patrick's Grunge Pledges" and "By Divine Design - Relief Society"