Traditions and Mothers' Day

The last ward I was in had some cool traditions that I don't suppose I appreciated as much than as I do right now, as I discovered I have missed them.

Take this last Saturday for instance - the annual fundraiser for young women's organization.  Last year the ward had actually combined young men's, young women's and primary scouts into one fundraiser.  Usually auctioning off desserts.  We had done that in my mom's ward, too.  Only we had professional auctioneers and more generous pockets.  But still.  A tradition that continues.

These are the cakes we made last year and the themed picture of Roland, Jenna and me at said activity. 

we donated three cakes and two plates of cookies

we didn't actually auction off this cake.  We had to try one

farm theme

cowboys and Indians

This one actually wasn't made until we moved to Oregon

Westward Pioneer!

This was for our family memorial day bbq

I don't remember having done themes until last year

We had moved to Oregon just before Fathers' Day and Jenna missed the tradition of seeing the priesthood members wearing hideous ties - this is the year she would actually get to cast her vote as she is now a member of the young women - the sponsors of the Father's Day traditions.

One year the young women filled up gift bags with things that started with POP - like POP tarts, POP rings, POPcorn . . . and passed them out to the men in addition to their annual awards to all ugly tie wearers (many who were not fathers).

I think the first week that we attended our current  ward was on a Fathers' Day. Fathers' Day was barely mentioned.  There was no program about it, no gifts, no acknowledgement except for the wish-with-the-announcements-and-that-is-all.  I don't even think the primary children sang.  The talks were on modern technology and the internet - which I thought was odd.

So I wondered if Mothers' Day would be just a regular sacrament meeting like it had been on Fathers' Day, but the programs were pink and Mothers' Day was printed on the cover. 

It sounds as if the speaker's had been called over a week ago, so I don't know why their names were missing from the program.  I saw a high council man on the stand and thought, "really?  they're giving us a dry speaker for Mothers' Day?" - perhaps he would have been a fantastic speaker - I don't know.  It was just my first thought.

The first speaker mentioned instilling values into our children - or children we may associate with.  Teach them things like how to cook, make their beds, vacuum and other house hold chores, teach self-reliance.  My mind went back to a time shortly after Roland and I were married.

Natalie was an only child whose parents had were so excited to have her in her life that they did everything for her.  EVERYTHING. They picked up after her, they waited on her hand and foot.  She didn't have to lift a finger.  She never learned.

I don't know how old she was when her dad passed away.  I don't know what kind of grievance she went through, if any.  She was in her first year of high school when I met her.  We weren't all that close, but she and Biff had some classes together and so I knew of her.  And I had heard about the problems she had encountered when she tried living on her own.

I don't remember where went to college.  It was close enough to visit mom on weekends, but  far enough that she needed/wanted to experience dorm life.  She hadn't been taught to pick up after herself.  She hadn't learned to cook or make her bed or use a vacuum.  Her experience away from home had a created quite a rude awakening.

She tried moving back in with her mom - who by then was having failing health - and Natalie certainly hadn't been prepared for anything like that - which puzzles me.  I know that her mother had provided service for Natalie's grandmother who hadn't been doing well either.  But then again, Natalie's mom was a very doting person and found it difficult to accept charity from others. 

I remember Natalie talking to Jenna at one time explaining how lucky she was to have siblings.  Natalie had wished with all her heart that she would have had a blood-related sibling to be raised along side of her.  She's finding her place - but the haul has been a rather slow and painful one.  She has learned a lot.  But everyone thinks she would have had it so much easier if she had been taught to work instead of always having things just handed to her - because in the adult world, things were not just handed to her.  Though her mother loved Natalie with all of her heart and soul, she hadn't prepared her to be an adult or take responsibility.

We all have different methods of rearing and raising our children.  I remember having lunch with the boys across the street.  We were at their grandma's house and each of them was hoping to eat his lunch with the coveted "gold" fork.  

It was decided that since I was the only "girl" at the table, that I could get to use the gold fork.  The truth is, I didn't want the gold fork.  I thought it would make my food taste weird.  I think it's weird that I had even thought that. It's not as though I possessed gourmet taste buds at the time, or even had a gourmet lunch.  It was probably something like macaroni and cheese or Jello salad.

The second speaker shared her experiences on "hating" Mothers' Day as she and her husband tried for children without results - at least not for the first 8 - 10 years they were married.  It is possible to enjoy Mothers' Day without being a mother.  Two years ago I found that I had a really hard time dealing with it,  but was really touched by the Mother's Day program in our ward in 2013.  I said nothing about Mothers' Day last year.  I think the ward passed out small loaves of homemade bread that year.  Awesome!  That ward was quite creative with Mothers' Day.

I think it was before Jenna was born when my two older boys surprised me when they each gave talks for Mothers' Day program.  The first year that Tony was on his mission, I received a rather creative and unexpected gift from the other two.  They used up an entire roll of film on themselves and bought a frame for three of them.  I still have that frame.  As of now, it displays three photos - one of each of my granddaughters.

I've had some really awesome Mothers' Days and some that were not so great.  It is always my attitude that makes or breaks - so why not just make with a great attitude every year?  I don't know.  I don't dislike Mothers' Day but there are some years when I would rather not deal with it.  I was pretty good about it this year.