Tuesday, March 21, 2017

One Concept at a Time - Temples  



            President and Sister Landon were dressed in their temple clothes.  They asked questions about how the temple made us feel, why we go to the temple, and what does the temple represent.  I was both pleased and surprised to learn that "Understand Temple Ordinances" had been Sharon's favorite.  She had her hand up to answer questions and participate.  

            I love to hear Pres. Landon speak.  He mentioned two of his grandchildren - cousins that are 3 and 4.  He had told us about the three-year-old before. She will often whine about whatever and say, "I can't do it.  It's too hard." (and he whines as he quotes her - which is most effective) 

            The four year old seemed uninvolved and quiet and often misunderstood.  It turned out that she needed glasses.  When she wore those glasses for the first time, she looked up at the stars - in taking the beauty.  Mesmerized almost.   Pres. Landon said that while she was out-side star gazing, her six-year-old sister (who didn't need glasses to assist with her vision) sat beside her and the four-year-old removed her glasses and handed them to the six-year-old (not realizing the 6-yr-old had been able to see them all along) and asked her if she would like to use them so that she could see the beauty in the sky. 

            I actually don't know which example he started with.  But isn't it amazing how different people react?  We are all children who react in the same manner.  Some of us whine  "I can't do it.  It's too hard" while others do their best to share their joy.   

            I think occasionally I am like the four-year-old.  Occasionally.  Overall I am more like the three-year-old whining  "I can't do it.  It's too hard." or "I know I can do it, but I don't want to.  I don't want this trial anymore.  I don't."  I want to lose the three-year-old part of myself and be the one who shares the joy.

            There were a few years when I was really good about going to the temple once a week or a few times a month . . . and then I allowed it to fade.  I went with the youth to Medford temple just once.  I have never gone through a session.  And honestly I haven't missed it - though I did enjoy the sense of peace I felt within the temple.  I did enjoy the solitude of "putting the world behind me" I don't see or feel the worldliness in Myrtle Creek as I did in Salt Lake. 

            We should go to the temple because we want to.  As of now, I really don't want to. 

            We then broke for lunch.  Roland had gone with us to help set-up, clean-up and serve.  He wore a purple shirt.  He was supposed to wear a white shirt and a tie.  He hadn't received the message. I don't know that any of the women cared.  Eva, who sat at my table, really liked Roland's purple shirt.  He is leader material.  Wouldn't have made any difference if he'd been wearing white.  He asked several questions to those "supposedly-in-charge"  He doesn't mind helping, but it would be nice if he were given direction.  After receiving too many "I don't know"s Roland put himself in charge and said, "This is how we're going to do it" and gave direction.  He doesn't do it to insult anyone.  He's just a take charge guy.  He told the men to be sure and ask at each table if there was anyone who had special dietary needs. 

            Eva's pretty "take-charge" herself.  When Sharon announced that she couldn't eat her salad, Eva volunteered to go to the kitchen to get some more chicken and rice.  She said she would eat the salad.  She LOVES salad.  She brought back a plate with Chicken rice and fresh broccoli but Sharon said she could chew the broccoli either.  It wasn't until then that I realized Sharon  didn't have any teeth.  So then I wondered how she was able to eat her meat. 

            Eva left the table periodically in order to mingle with other folk. It was fun to watch her enthusiasm.  There were two different desserts.  An overly tangy lemon pudding or a sugarless Jell-O that everybody seemed to like better.  No birthday cake this year. 

            Neither Eva nor Sharon were able to finish what was on their plates.  They got extra plates to cover their food and a box to cart around to their next four classes. 

Monday, March 20, 2017

One Concept at a Time - "Deception and Tools"



            Creating posts is often a feast or famine thing in my mind.  I have notes on paper but have not converted them to a copy and paste form.  The clock moves so quickly when I am on the computer - which means I will need a computer-related job so it won't feel like I'm there for eight hours.

            The Relief Society was organized on March 17, 1842.  LDS churches everywhere celebrate the RS birthday sometime in March (usually the 2nd week)  Each one I've been to in the past includes dinner and a program.  The birthday dinners I have attended in Utah have always been done on a ward level.  When I was called to the activities director in the Myrtle Creek ward, I was told that the March activity is always done by the stake. (For those unfamiliar with term "ward" and "stake", see here)

            I really enjoyed the meeting that I attended in the Roseburg Stake last year.  I don't remember taking notes although I must have.  Those two posts seemed quite lengthy if I was just going off handouts.  No one gave hand-outs this year.  I had even brought a tote bag to put them in. 

            Last year  I created two posts  (here and here) to describe the Saturday meeting.  I seem more pressed for time this year and so may have to stretch it out into several posts.  Last year I had made a comment that I wished the young women had been invited.  Last year we started off our meeting in the chapel.  We were given color bands to wear. 

            This year the young women had been invited.  We started off in the cultural hall and did not use the chapel at all.  The programs were color coded and easily traded.  Jenna told me that she wanted to be in the same room as me.  I didn't care.  We both found programs that were orange.  When she moved to a table to be with a friend, she sat in front of a program that was green but ended up with a yellow program.  Jenna and I were not on the same session - which I think was good for both of us.  I think we both got more out of it.  And she did participate.  But I don't know if she would have participated as freely had I been with her.

            I have mentioned before how the leaders try to assign a specific scripture or just a paragraph or two of someone else's talk and make a new talk out of it.  This assigned topic was Bonnie Oscarson's talk Rise Up, Sisters in Zion.

            There were four sisters at my table.  Eva and Stephanie stayed together, and I went on the same sessions as Sharon.  I was surprised to see her there as I've only seen her 3 or 4 times since I moved to Myrtle Creek.  I asked her if she'd be to church on Sunday, but I don't think she's been attending the Sunday meetings.  So it was nice to see her at a stake activity.

            The first class we attended was called "Don't Be Deceived by False Teachings".  Our instructor used to be a science teacher and started out the lesson by asking for a volunteer to bounce a ball and blow up a balloon.  Her rubber ball bounced but the volunteer's did not.  Both weighed the same and felt the same - yet only one was designed to bounce.  The one that didn't bounce had a heavier material similar to that found on bumpers. 

            The "balloon" was also a scientific "trick" The instructor was able to produce more air than the volunteer.  (Before Jenna went to this same class, I told her to be sure and volunteer - which she did.  But she called me mean.  Jenna had learned these concepts already and she knew was able to get a good amount of air into the "balloon".  She said that had been her favorite of all of the classes.

            We can be deceived by tools, knowledge and experience.  She told us about a book she'd been reading about a Senior devil trying to find a replacement, I think.  The author is C.S. Lewis. I don't remember the title though.  

            She then asked if we know why the ships running  to Portland will come up the river rather than make a direct move from the ocean.  While the boats are in the ocean, the barnacles will stick to the sides and the bottom of the boat; when the boats go into the river, the barnacles fall off.  Just as barnacles attach themselves to the boat, we allow sin to attach.  We need tools for detaching.  We need the "fresh water" tool to remove the "barnacles" of sin. 

            She concluded with a quote from Elder Jeffery R. Holland:




   That was just one class.  I will post more tomorrow and hopefully the rest this week.

Saturday, March 18, 2017

Turtle Power!






When Jenna returned home from school yesterday, she was in a very good mood.  She removed some of her green and added to it. 








She had wanted to dress up as a Ninja Turtle ever since she saw this sign








She tried to rope three of her friends into going with her.  They said they would all dress like Turtles, but only Jenna followed through








The woman at the counter seemed very excited and said she wondered when someone would show up in costume - indicating to me that Jenna was probably the first.


She got a free personal sized pizza








Uncle Bill would have dressed up his entire family as turtles the minute the sign went up.  However, I don't think he would drive thirteen hours to get it.







 I bet Bill is really quite pleased with Jenna.

Friday, March 17, 2017

Another St. Patrick's Day

I did not get a picture of my non-Irish looking girl (she actually does have some Irish in her; though not confirmed by DNA but family history) when she dressed in green the first year she attended Vista Elementary School.  I did get her picture today -




Happy birthday to my brother, Patrick and his grandson (my great nephew) born on the same day.



Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Feeding the Mormons

posted 12/10/2016

          Our ward did something different for the Christmas celebration this year.  Instead of the traditional dinner that is normally done, we had a Christmas breakfast.  And the Relief Society wasn’t in charge of fixing any of it.  It was catered!

          Last year, we had it in the Skyhawk room in Myrtle Creek – which seems to be a popular spot for annual events – and not just the cafeteria between the elementary and middle schools.  But this we had our breakfast at the Bible Christian Center in Riddle.  The inside of the facility definitely seems a lot bigger than the outside.  I was impressed.
         
          We had the option of scrambled eggs, hash browns, sausage patties, muffins, fruit, and in addition to the drink choices of milk, cran-raspberry juice, orange juice or hot cider.  I used a thick raspberry syrup for my pancakes and it was delicious.

          After an hour, the adults sang 7 different Christmas hymns while the primary went into another room to prepare for the program that was to follow.  Ten, including Jenna (who is not really in primary anymore) returned, dressed as angels.  Hayden was the only boy dressed as an angel.  The other two were dressed to represent Nephi and Samuel, the Lamanite.  The other two girls in primary wore their Church clothes and acted as the narrators.


          Jenna and I both sat at chairs that had stickers beneath.  Our sticker entitled us to take home a star to hang on our tree.


Angel robe and halo

star ornament 

Saturday, March 11, 2017

My Shared Primary Class

          As I have mentioned in previous posts, my first calling in this ward was with teaching the sunbeams.  I have never seen a physical attendance roll in the entire time I've been here, but I believe there were four sunbeams in total.  I think the most I ever had in my class at one time was three.

           My first experience in that class was a visitor named Dylan.  I live in an area where there are many members who are related to one another.  I think Dylan was a nephew of the former sunbeam teacher who had developed a comfort zone with teaching sunbeams. She seemed to hover just a bit to make sure I was doing the calling justice.  She had been newly called to Young Women's.  I had heard her give a talk just the week before and thought it was an awesome calling for the young women to have her on board.

          Dylan doesn't come every Sunday.  But he's been there enough that it seems like his name would have been added to the roll - but I don't know.  The most I ever had in class at one time was three.  After Skylar and his mom had moved out of the ward, it was mostly Emily by herself - which did not thrill her.  She didn't know me.  It was scary for her to be in the room with me.  And she cried for about a month before she decided to become a horse (see here)

          The following year I had her cousin, Hayden Braun, who was also not thrilled with the idea of being left alone with this stranger - though he seemed to come around a lot faster than Emily had.   For about a month his dad (who had actually called me to the position) sat with Hayden while I gave the lesson.  Bro. Braun had somehow felt impressed by my teaching methods.

          In this post I explained how I came to transition from Sunbeams to Valiants.  It is the larger of the two classes - with at least eleven children - though the most that have come (since I have been teaching) is eight.  Danny has returned to teach the class.  She comes to church for just one hour to teach.  I try my best to discipline Helen and Thomas.

          Both of them have to have something in their hand to wiggle, to rip, to play with, to destroy . . . Helen actually absorbs everything being said.  It amazes me that she actually knows the answers - or most of them anyway.  Thomas on the other hand seems focused on anything NOT related to the lesson - unless he happens to wearing his glasses - which unfortunately has not been every week. When he has his glasses on, it almost seems like he is a different child.

          I actually described Thomas in this post  though I hadn't shared his name. There have been a number of times I have said to Roland:  "Please explain something to me as though you were explaining to Thomas Jay." 

            I think of the eleven class members, I have already mentioned five of them in one post or another - I suppose because Jenna had been in the same primary class with many of them. Thomas had been in the CTR class when Jenna started attending Young Women's and did not start the Valiant class until just this year.

          When I was teaching, I asked Roland to please sit with my class - particularly Thomas.  Roland often has a way of teaching children and keeping them in line.  I figured that since he had already made a connection with Thomas that Thomas would listen to him.   Thomas had somehow made a connection with me while I was still teaching Sunbeams and he was a CTR.  It was with his extended family where Jenna, Roland and I had Thanksgiving in 2016.

           It had been during the hour that both primary classes meet in one room for singing time and sharing time. Thomas would choose to sit next to me when I was teaching Hayden - or perhaps it wasn't always by choice.  Often there are just certain individuals who cannot sit together.  The primary leaders didn't like Thomas to sit with his sibs or cousins.  As I mentioned, Thomas feels the need to keep his hands busy - even if it is to taunt others.

           For the most part the class members are eager to participate: read scriptures, say prayers, and so forth.  Helen and Thomas have both expressed their lack of desire to read - which is okay.  I'm not going to make anyone read if they don't want to.  I feel more like a referee than a teacher.  Especially with Danny returning to her position. 


          Danny and I have two totally different teaching methods.  Not that there's anything wrong with that.  I think of it as an early introduction to diversity. Whatever works, right?  Danny sets up the chairs against the wall in a straight line putting a great distance between herself and the students.  I put the group in a circle.  I have allowed for more reading thus far.  Danny incorporates more videos and games.  We both ask tons of questions.

           Our largest class (well, since I have been a part of it) was yesterday.  The only two missing were Callie (who has been active for the most part during Achievement nights, but I think I have only seen her attend Sunday meetings four times since we moved to Myrtle Creek) and Krystal, (here) who has been coming with her grandma until her grandma went out of town.  I had called last night to see if we could pick her up this morning.  I never heard back from the family.  We haven't had any luck getting a hold of them on Sunday.

           Two of our class members will start young women's this year.  Callie and Lisa.  Lisa is Thomas and Emily's oldest sister.  She is really smart in math.  Though she's still in elementary school, Jenna says she has seen Lisa at her middle  school as she Lisa takes math on a level higher than her elementary school. Callie is also attending  Coffenberry Middle School but Jenna says they don't interact with one another.

           In the past Lisa had been invited to sit with Emily during singing time when Emily was having a hard time making the transition from nursery to sunbeams.  And Ann was allowed to sit with Hayden.  Ann and Lisa are both focused enough to comfort their sibs while still paying attention to their leaders. 

           Christopher actually does do better with the CTR class than he did in sunbeams.  Helen has tried to "mother" him the way Lisa and Ann had done with their sibs.  But Helen is HORRIBLE.  Christopher does much better without her.  Both the CTR instructor and I have requested to keep Helen and Christopher separate - thus separating Lisa from Emily and Ann from Hayden so that we're not playing favorites.

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Visiting Salem




                It seems highly possible that we will be moving again within the next 2-3 years.  Roland wants to start a business, and we considered an adult day care in Myrtle Creek - we had even found the most perfect building and location - but the business will need to be open 6-8 months before we can get the benefits for Veteran and Medicare support.  It would be less costly just to take over someone else's business or become a sub company and partner with a business that already has a name; they would be our parent company, I suppose. 

        He has talked to a woman in Taggart who offers adult day care as well as residency.  We are just interested in doing the daycare portion at this time.  Or he is, rather. I have not made it a secret with how I feel about business.  I don't want to get into food.  I think Roland would rather just leave Myrtle Creek and go to where he can not only create a business, but establish cliental - which actually doesn't seem so promising in Myrtle Creek.  Roland will have to educate potential cliental on whatever business he chooses - where some of more populated cities are already in the frame of mind to except (or even accept) whatever kind of business Roland may open.  

         I personally, will have a very hard time leaving this area.  I love the close-knit - pull-together community that we currently live in - not necessarily offered in larger cities.  Roland's always talking about moving to Eugene - which is my opinion seems to resemble Salt Lake City in many ways.  No.  I don't want to live in Lane County.  I'd be willing to move to Polk or Marion County.  I wanted to prove to him that Eugene and Portland are not the only two cities in Oregon with business opportunity.  On Saturday we went to our state's capitol city: Salem. 




        Most of the items I had written on my list for outdoors and the weather was quite overcast and often raining.  The Riverfront Carousel is an indoor carrousel.  It was a two and a half hour drive each way, but I think it was worth it to capture Jenna's smile. 

        We first stopped at a Burger King in Cottage Grove.  We were hungry.  She always asks for a crown.  I think at least two of my boys would do the same, and proudly wear the crown.




        The name of Jenna's horse was Razzle Dazzle.  She noticed the horse's medallion right away.  I don't think I would have noticed.  We thought it to be exceptionally cool.



I thought she should be on the outside  so that she could grab rings out of the fish's mouth.  The person that ends up with the "brass" ring gets another free ride. 





Jenna leaned out to grab the rings.  I think we had seven of them.  Assorted red, white and green.  But there was a heavier ring to represent the brass ring. 






        So Jenna went around again and smiled widely as she collected rings. 




        We took a short walk around the grounds and took a few pictures of the riverfront. 










       
        After Jenna finished with her delight at the children's playground (which she is obviously too big for)




        We headed to the Salem Public Library.  We were allowed to park for free as there was an event going on.  Several tables had been set up by members of the community to advertise places of business - sort of like an indoor fair without the food or rides.

        Jenna loved earning prizes and demonstrated her skills on ukulele. 






        The instructor's were impressed with how quickly she picked up on the fingering, but Uncle Bill had showed how back when we were still living in Utah.



        I have a cousin who lives in Salem.  Unfortunately we have not been able to touch base (except through facebook) since we arrived in this state.



        I had a lot of ideas in my head about what to post and how many new blogs I could create.  It was the weekend and my family became a priority over the keyboard.  Or else I have been tired.


        It snowed on Sunday morning.  Jenna was really happy about that.  We drove to Church in the same conditions we had faced all too often in Salt Lake . . . but it was gone long before Church let out.  Weird.






Honoring the Memory


                The school held a hat day sometime last month.  Jenna couldn't find any of her fedoras and so she took the plastic tiara that she had received during a young women's lesson earlier that week.  Meanwhile she found a fedora but ended up taking the plastic crown anyway. 

                Through the course of the day she would ask guys to try it on and take pictures.  On February 10 she posted pictures other friends on facebook.  At least nine guys proudly wore that crown.  One of them was Andrew.  She did not get one of Nick.  The last words she said to him was to ask him to put the tiara on his head.  The last words she had said to Andrew was to let him keep a pencil that he had borrowed.

                Someone had taken several facebook pictures to make a collage.  Her photo of Andrew was included in the tribute that was passed from wall to wall.

                I have been disoriented, so it's not hard for me to imagine being so out of it that I don't know where I am or how I got there.  I've also been sedated.  I have watched enough sci-fi movies to imagine what it must be like to open my eyes only for a second to have someone stick me with a needle to put me back to sleep.  I can imagine what it's like to wake up in a hospital and wonder what I am doing there. 

                I can't imagine being told that six members of my family were lost in a fire during the wee hours of the morning - while the majority of the community slept.  I don't even know if they were aware of the fire or just who called it in. The reporters didn't say how the fire was discovered.
           
                It hasn't even been a week since my last post, and yet it feels so much longer.  Nick's life was lost with three other children whom he treated like brother and sisters.  Andrew and his mom passed away the next day at the hospital in Portland.

                The father figure is still in critical condition.  I don't know if he will survive and continue his life on earth or if he will be called to return along with his family. I can't even imagine.  How would I react if I was left alone to survive without them?  How strong am I that I would have the courage to go on and face life with an attitude pleasant enough that others would continue to want to be there for me.   Would I blame God?  Would I blame myself?  Would I constantly be in denial and wish it was just a horrible scene from a televised movie?  My prayers is for this man to find the strength that he will need.

                Jenna says the attendance at school has been less than half.  Coffenberry changed the facepage to profile the two boys who had attended that middle school.  Now they are selling tee shirts in honor of their memory.  They will not be forgotten. See here and here.


Wednesday, March 1, 2017

Let's All Wear Red Tomorrow



            Our local news comes from Eugene - located in Lane county which is north of Douglas.  The news stories usually start off with some criminal activity in Springfield or Eugene.  Sometimes human interest stories in Eugene.  Rarely is the focus ever on Douglas.  Except this morning.  And updates throughout the day.

            Tri City recorded population is 3,931, but Myrtle Creek says 3,439.  I would guess both cities put together fall somewhere between the two numbers as we use the same zip code.  The city of Riddle lies just south west of us.  Their recorded population was 1185.  That number has gone down by four due to a tragic fire.

            I first heard about it after Jenna returned home from school.  She reported that one of her classmates was killed in the fire, and another in critical condition at Legacy Emmanuel Medical Center in Portland  which is more than four hours away by car. I don't know how they (his mom and dad also survived) were taken. 

            I remember a helicopter landing in the parking lot of the church that I lived across from in Kearns, Utah.  It was there to life flight a victim to Primary Children's hospital in Salt Lake.  Life Flight was offered, along with a lot of convenient medical options.  The options don't seem so convenient in Oregon - at least much of it.
   
            There is so much devastation in our small little community.  The names of the family members had all been released to the press.  The children who lost their lives were 4-year-old Gwendolyn Howell, 7-year-old Haley Maher, 10-year-old Isaiah Young and 13-year-old Nicholas Lowe. 

            Jenna said that all the kids at her school are wearing red in Nick's memory and perhaps to show their support to Andrew who's still alive - we hope.  Our prayers are with the family.  





Thank you to all the men and women who serve as firefighters.  Thanks to all of thos who are willing to serve on the volunteer fire departments.  God bless you all.


Saturday, February 25, 2017

That was a Painful Week



          As I mentioned in my last post, I am up to two classes again. In one accounting class I am required to used QuickBooks online.  The other feels like a refresher course - though I think I'd get more out of it if I had the same instructor that I had for 101 and 102. 

           My payroll instructor wasn't exactly monotone, but his voice did seem unenthusiastic for the most part - as though he'd rather be sitting in a dentist chair getting his teeth drilled than having to teach a class.  One instructor that I have is at the other extreme - trying to compensate for the less-than-exciting material by being "overly" enthusiastic.  I almost feels like I am taking a class taught by my brother-in-law.

           The instructor I like listening  to the most is the one I have for QuickBooks.  He's not boring.  He's not overly enthusiastic (like it's forced) When I am listening to his lecture, it feels like we are one on one and he is showing me what icons to click on and is great as explaining why.  I think his voice is easy to follow.  I like his class better of the two.

           Before the class even started, I had received an email from my  dean to set up an account in QuickBooks.  In the event that my information was put on a permanent junk-mail file, I chose to open the account on hotmail - which I keep open to use as a unwanted email account.  Unfortunately, when I had created the final step I used my hotmail user name but with a yahoo attachment - thus making my user name at hotmail invalid.

           The problem I had been created by me, and couldn't seem to be corrected - at least not in the time frame I was looking for.  Much of the communication from their end was being sent to a non-existing account - at least for me.  Thus I created a brand new account from my yahoo but with a different user name.  I didn't figure I'd be able to do anything with that class until sometime today.  Boy, was I ever surprised to have my account activated the following day.
          And so I worked on that.  But I seemed to be missing some steps or couldn't take screenshots with the appropriate information as it was not being displayed.  It took me three days to complete my assignment (good thing I was able to start it earlier than I had believed)

          Meanwhile I seemed to be neglecting my other class.  I managed to struggle through that and turned in both assignments yesterday.  I probably should have saved my assessments for today, but decided to do them yesterday.  Unfortunately I didn't do well at either one.  Let's hope I receive a better grade on the assignments.  That has actually been the case thus far.

           Meanwhile I've been neglecting my blog - not to mention other blogs I've been reading.  Jenna was home from school yesterday and I had attempted to spend quality time with her so she didn't feel neglected.  I skimmed over my primary lesson but will need to go over it again.  In addition I've been attempting to clean the house - or tidy it up a bit. 

       
          After over three months of not having full time missionaries in our ward, they have returned and so we will be feeding them tonight.  I wonder if they have  A Voice from the Dust in their collection.  It was suggested to show to my primary class about the three witnesses.  I suppose I can ask.


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Recognizing Effort


                My appreciation for art is so-so.  There are certain paintings that appeal to me for various reasons - and perhaps on a subconscious level, it is the lighting and balance and whatever other techniques are used by the artist.  Usually, it is the subject of the painting.  That is what I am focused on, not the colors, tones, hues or layers for example.  All the detail that is put into a professional painting seems overwhelming to me and actually seems to detract from the beauty that I had seen there initially.

            In college, I once took an art appreciation class - just to force myself to understand and hopefully appreciate it more.  It backfired. I was so put out by the symbolic gestures and the history, it's a wonder I didn't drop the class.  I would struggle with these foreign concepts and tried to apply them to whatever piece of work we were doing.  I tried really hard.  Or so I believed.  My work and effort were below average and therefore so were my grades . . . . until one assignment that we did in crayon.

            The subject was a milk can.  Our instructor said to pick out all the colors that were reflecting off the milk can and underneath the surface and this and that and lighting, shades and hues and . . .  my poor confused brain.  I really didn't understand what he was talking about.  As I wasn't doing particularly well in that class anyway, I decided to "fake" it.  I got out my box of crayons and started scribbling a variety of colors over what would become my milk can.  I scribbled one area with a white crayon and one with a black crayon to that when I went over the entire milk can with my grey crayon, some of it would appear lighter and some would be darkened. 

            I was in the midst of covering all the scribbles with my gray crayon when the teacher came around and complimented me on my good work.  Was he for real?  Did he really believe that I had really seen the blue, orange and green scribbles in the can?  I wasn't even trying.  I hated creating "art" and I just didn't even care anymore.  That was the day I stopped trying to better myself in that particular class.  My grade point average had gone up after that.  It felt like a slap in the face, really. It didn't seem appropriate that I would receive the message: "you'll do a whole lot better if you don't try"  That's not right!

            I did not post last week as I had devoted so much of my time to my payroll final - which by the way, I never did finish. I did try.  Boy, did I try.  I burned out more hours on this one assignment than I had any other in my entire lifetime - or so it seemed. My final grade for the class came as a surprise. I was pretty certain that my instructor would not be going through each and every single answer of each and every single student.  Apparently, I did enough that he did know I had at least tried (on the final, excel would not accept the wrong answer - so it was either come up with the correct answer or leave it blank)

            I am more satisfied with my grade and my accomplishments that I earn.  I'm not an accountant yet.  I don't like numbers.  I don't like business.  But I do enjoy learning.  I'm grateful for the opportunities I have been given that I may accomplish even more.  Perhaps one day I'll actually develop a love for my "career".  Right now I'm just tolerating it.

            I've finished payroll and am now taking two more accounting classes.  I think they will be easier than payroll.  I don't know if my instructors will be as easy as my last instructor.  I suppose I'll have a better understanding later this week.