There is a Difference

 There is a great difference between

Black and white

Day and night

Sunshine and Rain

Happiness and Emotional Pain

There is also a tremendous difference

Between the church and the gospel of Jesus Christ

Sadly there are those who base their testimony upon historical figures or other members of the church, and when imperfection is revealed there are many that have gone astray.  There appears to have been some big hoopla lately about the plural marriage among some of the brethren in Church history – particularly Joseph Smith who doesn’t appear to have been honest with how it was done.

Joseph Smith was the first prophet in this dispensation.  The Church of Jesus Christ had not been on the earth for 15 centuries.  Cut the guy a break.  What example did he have to follow?  God had given him instructions.  Sometimes he followed them to the letter.  Sometimes, unfortunately, he felt that he knew better than God and would follow his own fears.  We all make mistakes.  Perhaps his seem more severe because of the position he was in.  

 

There were a lot of mistakes made in Church history.  Some that have been kept hidden from Church members – or so it seemed.  Like the Mountain Meadow Massacre,  the fact that the four men in Carthridge jail were given weapons to defend themselves,  or the sisters involvement in women’s suffrage movement or some of the hostilities that took place among polygamist wives.

At one time those in authority painted the church in a certain light – perhaps lifting it to a higher pedestal than it deserved.  Oh, certainly the church endured its hardship – but it was always the fault of the outsiders, never the members of the church.  The authorities would call the gospel perfect when they referred to the church and so many members would assume they meant the church was perfect.  And it was not.  It still is not.  The church is run by imperfect leaders who (hopefully) strive to live perfect lives – but let's face it: Only one man who has lived upon the earth was perfect.  Nobody else fits into the perfect category.  No one.  And thus church itself can never be perfect if run by imperfect humans.

Roland and I were married by a bishop who (at that time) happened to be state auditor by profession.  I had once asked him: “What is more organized?  The state? Or the church?” 

His answer bothered me a lot because he said “the state” and I think the government in this state is so severely flawed that it almost makes me ashamed to tell people what state I live in.  So what does that say about the Church?

For many the church is just for show.  That’s how it was for the Pharisees of old.  Church history does NOT represent the truthfulness of the gospel.  Sadly, there are several who seem to have a hard time separating the two.  But then again, why should we have to separate them?  If everyone lived according to the gospel, wouldn’t the church itself be perfect?  Think about it.

Why is it that everything has to (or should) be approved by the brethren?  Too many Inaccuracies or opinions given that are taken as gospel truth – though that was not the intent.  Even the best of intentions can sometimes have negative results.

Let’s use “pioneer Trek” as an example – an activity that has become popular for the youth of the Church.  The program has evolved into something more than what it was when I was a youth.  There was no “Woman’s Pull” – there was no “reenactment” of the Mormon Battalion.  What many participants don’t realize is that not all the men left the company nor were the women left alone.

 

         At the time Pres. James Polk sent for a recruit of 500 volunteers from Pioneer crossing party, the year was 1846 – the Pioneers at the time were crossing in Wagons.  They weren’t pushing handcarts.  Perhaps there’s a great metaphor and lesson in store for those involved – but in the minds of many they believe that’s how it actually was in Mormon history.  And granted, there probably were a few woman who had lost their husbands, sons and fathers who may not have had the support of the brethren per se– but not as an entire company.  There was always leader support.  Or so we assume (We do have the story in which Mary Fielding Smith is believed to have crossed the plains on her own; some part (or perhaps all) is based on true story that has become Mormon folklore – another part of Church history that we need to separate)

         So where am I going with this?  Nowhere really.  I used to be one of those who would take everything on face value and never actually research it out on my own.  Fortunately for me I have learned that “the Church” does not “the gospel” make and hopefully I may continue to be active in both but always keep in mind that even leaders (past or present) have faults just like me.

         I’ve always been taught to pray about my understanding of things to know if it’s true or not – as far as the gospel goes anyway.  I don’t think it’s necessary for me to pray about my understanding of Church history or what saints were involved doing what because whether this pioneer story or that hand-me-down passage really turns out to be true or not, what pertinent difference does it make to my own Salvation?  My testimony needs to be based upon the truths that Christ taught and not what happened in the personal lives of our forefathers.

Here’s an Example:

Every year my family would go on vacation.  Mom and dad would sit us down and ask us what we’d like to do and we were allowed to give our input.  I think Corey was only eight or nine the year that we decided to go up through Canada.  We decided what Providences we would visit, what sites we would see and the route we would travel.  

I think we hit Seattle, Washington the second day and Corey had added seeing the Space Needle to our agenda.  Corey had obviously researched it out.  Apparently he had a map in his head and kept on saying: “We need to do this.”  “We need to do that.”

None of us had ever been there before and didn’t know what to expect – but Corey was determined and it was because of him that we were able to explore the shadow room, and the echoed phone, and the pulley and a bunch of cool stuff that we would have not even known was there – but Corey was well read.  He became our tour guide.  I was always impressed by his skills of having never even been there before and because of his young age.

In British Columbia we saw the Butchart Gardens, Vancouver Zoo and Nitobe Memorial Garden to name a few.  I remember being highly entertained by the penguins at the zoo and being at Nitobe right after it rained.  The several inches of water covered the garden so perfectly.  We would not have known that it wasn’t part of the garden if our hostess hadn’t told us that it wasn’t.

By the time we got to Alberta, Canada was celebrating its Independence Day and whatever we had planned that day fell through due to closure - I think we reached the states a day ahead as we had left Canada early.  We did not get to see Alberta Temple, but we did make it to Idaho Falls – not inside though.  Unless mom and dad went and Patrick and I watched Corey and Kayla. I can't remember.

There was one year when my family decided that we would just stay home and see the sites in Utah.  We went to the Alpine Slide in Park City.  Lagoon Amusement Park, Rice Stadium for really cool fireworks.  What awesome fun.  What great memories!  

I love that mom and dad always included us and helped us to explore (research) on our own and made us feel a part of it from the beginning.  And not just with vacations.  We were able to contribute to family conversations and have meaningful discussions if we chose to.

Valentine’s Didn’t Happen

Earlier this week, Jenna came home

all excited and

folded an open box into

a closed one,

added a face and

the hearts that she and

her friend had cut out of

colored paper. 

She said there was a contest and

she came up with

the idea of turning her box into

the school mascot.

On Wednesday she was crying when

I picked her up – disappointed

that one class did not

collect all the needed points and

thus they wouldn’t be having

the Valentine’s party she had so

looked forward to. 

On Thursday I said she should take

 her box and prepared Valentines anyway –

just in case.

She threw up in class and so

was taken to the office and

put in the sick room

to wait until somebody arrived.

My phone was in my pocket.

  Unfortunately it had been turned off. 

Roland was on his cell phone

talking to someone. 

Randy was in class. 

Carrie was at work. 

Evidently the staff had gone through

every single number I had provided for

emergency contact – some outdated

I guess. 

I felt bad that they had gone

to all that trouble. 

They said they had tried everyone

 on the list.

Jenna asked,

“Who is Dora?”

“Oh,”

that’s when I realized

the list was outdated. 

“She taught you in primary

a couple of times when

we attended our old ward. 

You used to call her

Dora, the Explorer”

“Oh, yea. 

I sort of remember her. 

Why isn’t Corey on the list?”

“Corey is in Las Vegas. 

I had him and grandma on

the list when you

were in first grade.” 

I had eliminated contacting grandma

for the year that I started

my blog.
 

Jenna had a fever. 

She stayed in bed all day –

except for once in a while after

she would drink something,

she would make her way into

the bathroom to throw up. 

But we brought her fever down in time and

after long her stomach wasn’t hurting anymore either. 

But she still felt dizzy whenever she stood.

I had given her the cards that

arrived in the mail. 

Two of them:

a Valentine from her

activity days leader and

one from our former next door neighbor whom she called

 “grandma”

plus there had been a box of

chocolates that dad brought home.

Yesterday was Valentine’s Day. 

She didn’t deliver because

she still felt dizzy when she moved.

  We stayed home.

We both took it easy.

Roland used to do Valentines for

the women in my family.

 A box of chocolates, flowers,

 one year we made red doughnuts. 

Another year he purchased heart

 shaped pizzas. 

I think that was the

last year.

This year he purchased candy bars

for all the RS and primary presidency. 

He printed up the note

“All Classy Ladies deserve

chocolate on Valentines Day 

Even if they are a little nuts” 

They have not been delivered, however. 

Perhaps he is just planning on

handing them out at Church tomorrow.

There was a knock at the door

sometime after Jenna had gone to bed. 

Whoever it was had walked away

after leaving a sack of

candy for Jenna. 

This morning I learned that

it was/is from Trume. 

So we did receive Valentines. 

And Jenna created three more.

 They won’t be received until

next week. 

Valentine’s Day is over. 

Jenna feels better. 

Outside is still grey

Before Clue, There was Mr. Ree

         I don’t know how old I was when Grandma showed us the game Mr. Ree.  I vaguely remember seeing the game.  I don’t know if my cousins and I attempted to play it – I think we did, but soon became bored with it.  We didn’t really understand what we were supposed to do.

         As I have researched the Internet to learn if there were really any similarities between Mr. Ree and Clue,  Mr. Ree sounds like it may have been more challenging or fun to play – but I could be wrong.  I just remember thinking the layout of the Mr. Ree board was similar to the mansion set for clue.

Of course there are different versions of each game – changing design and pieces every decade or so for whatever reason. 

This is what I remember from my childhood:

  

Recently my son, Tony, and his wife gave me a new addition of clue which comes with two crime scenes.

Happy Valentine's Day!

April Rain: author review

Recently Jenna and I checked some books out from the library.  One of these books was called Inside Out and Back Again by Thanhha Tai – a story written in a free verse and dated as would a journal or diary.  The experience of Ha (the narrator) reminds me of Thuan Huynh’s own life as recorded in April Rain – a book I received for a birthday almost seven years ago. 

At the time Thuan was working at the same office as Roland.  He autographed the book for me and I started reading it and was intrigued with his life’s journey and for the huge sacrifice that his mother had made for him and his sister and for the love he had for his family members – particularly his mom and his sister.  And for the courage that each of them endured

Though it is an easy book and can hold the reader’s interest to move quickly through the pages, I am still quite a slow reader (though I did read it quicker than most books while it was in my possession).  I shared the book with others that I knew would be able to read it faster, and so it wasn’t until Thuan and Roland were no longer working together when I came across the photo at the end of the book.

The photo shows Thuan with his wife and son.  It appears that all three are dressed in white.  I had no clue that Thuan even had a son.  For the wife in the photo is not the same wife I had been introduced to at the company barbeque.  I was later told that he had divorced the wife that I met.  And really, I don’t know the circumstances of either partner or why he is no longer with either of them. 

I believe it was rumored that Thuan had had an affair in another state.  His boss had tried to get in touch with him to close a deal – but Thuan hadn’t answered his phone.  His boss ended up doing the majority of the work and so gave Thuan only a small percentage of the sale.  I think Thuan should have been grateful – if it hadn’t been for his boss, the deal would have never gone through and no money would have been made for either one of them.  But Thuan took him to court to claim a larger percentage of the sale – and walked away with more than he himself had earned.  It put a huge damper on the relationship he had had with his boss – both professionally and personally.

Now as for the wives or the rumor of the affair, I don’t know.  I suppose I don’t really KNOW about the sale and percentage dispute either – only what I have been told by others who were involved – hearsay – but not from Thuan himself.  I don’t really know him.  Only what is written in his book.  And I still think it’s a marvelous achievement and should probably be a required reading with every youth in America.  I respect who he was and the accomplishments he has made.  But I have lost respect about some things – but as I said I don’t know the accuracy of what I was told.  And even if I were to hear from Thuan Huynh himself, I still wouldn’t know the accuracy.  I think his words in April Rain are quite truthful, but I don’t know if they are anymore.

Thuan actually does not go by the name of Thuan nor has for some time.  I started this post with his American name, but decided to change it as he is in currently in a position in which scandal could be harmful.  And because I don’t KNOW, it’s not my place to turn others against him.  Not that I’m against him.  I’m not.  He’s human.  He may have made mistakes.  He may have been in a financially tight situation in which he felt he had no alternative but to take his boss to court.  Still, I wonder if he had even bothered to involve God in his decision.

Regardless of who is now, April Rain really is an awesome autobiography that I highly recommend.  Inside Out and Back Again is also good reading.  We can learn history through the survivors.   It’s important that we learn.  It’s also important to forgive.

Clipping Coupons and Providing Family

My brother just recently shared this post on his facebook page:

When Mom was 13 her parents divorced. When she was 16 her mom remarried. Both of these events were very difficult for Mom for reasons I won't go into here.

In this entry of 1982 she says the following:

"It was also during my teens that I made some vows: 1) I would never raise my children in an apartment 2) With all my heart I would do everything to avoid a divorce 3) I would do my best to be home with my children 4) I would try not to lay guilt on my children 5) My children would be involved in family councils in which they could present their ideas."

Check, check, check, check, and check, Mom. Well done!

I remember mom clipping coupons from the back of the carton of Highland Milk.  Even on a budget, those coupons provided us opportunity for going to the zoo, amusement parks, and so forth.  Mom and dad held strong family ties and taught us values – though we didn’t know it at the time.

Shortly after my brother, Corey, was born, our monthly bills seemed to outweigh dad’s income.  Apparently he and mom discussed his taking on a second job – fearing that the long hours would become a strain to his health (not to mention that none of us would ever see much of him) mom decided that she would go back to work.  She decided she would find a job that would provide hours after my dad got home. 

Mom worked at the ice cream store longer than needed.  When a manager was needed, she volunteered as she was not thrilled with the idea of other candidates being her manager.  What started out as a necessity eventually became extra income for the family.  I believe she was there until the store closed.  

Mom took on other forms of employment after daddy died.  By then Patrick was married and out of the house.  Corey would come and go with education and employment.  She took on day hours when we were each old enough to care for ourselves.

I appreciate both dad and mom’s strength and sacrifices.  My sibs and I are truly blessed.

Name That Tune

Our theme for this month is on the plan of salvation.  I had wanted to get the class members’ input if there was a certain topic each would like to focus on.  Subject suggestions were on faith, agency and music to name a few.  I absolutely LOVE music and the concept behind the hymns and how to use the hymn book and so forth.  But as the month started, I just didn’t feel inspired to do the lesson on music.  I actually had one beam at the subject of music.

 

That was the same week of ward conference.  The musical number was beautiful – a medley of “Come Follow Me” and “Lord, I would Follow Thee” Very uplifting.  Scott got up after the musical and made comment that he hates going after the musical number.  I can’t say as I blame him.  The Spirit is often felt quite strongly through music.  When I returned home from the meeting I felt impressed to create a “Name That  Tune Hymn ”  10 to be played and guessed and 10 more with clues.  

 

When I was growing up, it seemed that our ward congregation would sing the same 40 – 60 songs over and over again and so the tunes more familiar and could easily be guessed.   But as I mentioned in this post, our ward choirister has taken us through pretty much the entire hymn book and so I don’t know who in my class is familiar with any hymns (I guess I’ll find out on Sunday)

Every once in a while the scheduled speaker for a given sacrament meeting would be unable to attend (for whatever reason) and sometimes congregation members were called on the spot. But I recall one year (when I was no longer a youth but had a calling in which I worked with the youth) I remember the bishop announcing that the assigned speakers did not show and rather than call members from the congregation and put them on the spot for testimony or to give a talk with only that two minute notice, he would try something different.  

He had made arrangements with the chorister and hoped to get participation from those in the congregation and said he would like those who felt impressed to come to the stand with their hymnbooks and share the title of our favorite hymn and why the hymn had meaning for us and then the chorister would play the hymn while the congregation sang.  These meetings were well liked by many – the youth in particular.

 

As I was preparing for my lesson, by reading through talks and blogs,  I was reminded that hymns chosen need to be approved by the bishop and I thought that perhaps my idea should be approved as well.  I sent my list of songs and included the ten clues and wondered what suggestions or changes he might add – if indeed I’d be allowed to follow through on my idea.

I just  finished reading his email.  he not only loves the idea but has encouraged me to incorporate this into my lesson every month?  Holy cow.  Now I’ll have to follow through for at least this week.  Gosh, what did I just get myself into?  Hope the youth may love it as much as my bishop seems to.

A True Story That Makes Me Laugh

 

All three or my boys were in high school at the time.  (I don’t remember if I had given birth to Jenna yet) They were 15, 16, and 17.  My husband often referred (and still does) to the 15 year old as Casper as he had a way of disappearing for every chore.

One night Biff and Tony were washing dishes when Randy went on one of his disappearing jaunts.  He had excused himself to get music – or perhaps it was already playing – his idea of music anyway.

Biff and Tony listened to Soft Jazz and oldies.  Randy listened to what kids his age would listen to – I guess.  Still listens to bizarreness with no beat really.  I don’t care for what he thinks of as music.  Apparently neither did his brothers.

As Biff and Tony (who are both older than Randy – but only by one of two years) continued to do dishes they went into discussion about how Randy was of another generation.  I started laughing.  So they tried to correct their mistake by saying, “Well, kids that are Randy’s age” which made me laugh all the more.

“You guys are all actually of the same generation and pretty close in age.”  I reminded them.  Still, they were convinced that the distance between them and Randy was the same as between them and Jenna.   She’s technically the same generation also, but there is a distance between technology and current events. 

Academically, Randy and Jenna seem the brightest.  Biff has innocence and can often recognize things that the others overlook.  Tony is currently the only one with children – well one daughter.  But long before he even thought of getting married, he was the only prepared for changing diapers.  Still is.  He’s the only one of my three boys who would change Jenna – though Biff took a stab at it, the change was unsuccessful as he couldn’t figure out how to work the diaper.

Having them believe their age is so much greater always cracks me up when I think about that night when they were doing dishes.

Utah Addresses

I think most counties in Utah use a numbering system surrounding their “main street” I don’t actually know what the focal point is in Logan or Provo for example, but I do know that Temple Square is the central point in Salt Lake city and its surrounding areas. 

Surrounding Temple Square are four streets called South Temple, West Temple, North Temple and Main Street.  Each street is numbered thereafter according to whatever direction – but starting in the three digits. 

 

 For example 1^st north is also 100 north.  I know, it’s confusing for those who don’t drive it everyday, but for those of us who live here, it is what it is. So if I grew up on 311 E 7980 S, I would be approximately 80 blocks south of the temple and a little over 3 blocks east.

My mom grew up in San Francisco but still had family in Utah.  She used to feel sorry for children in Utah having to learn a difficult address like 2530 S 500 E or 1575 W 1000 N.  It wasn’t until after she moved to Utah that she found that it was easier to find an address based upon the number.  And for the most part, it is.

Some streets have names.  Our 100 east is more commonly referred to as State Street.  I don’t know if it was ever called 100 East or if residents of Salt Lake even know it as 100 East.  There was a time in history that State Street actually went from the capitol of Salt Lake to the county seat in St. George.

 But with the freeway system and highways and new growth, State Street has been broken up into pieces and so you may still find parts of it in other counties, but I think the longest stretch is from the capitol building to Sandy or Draper.  There are parts of it in Provo, American Fork, Fountain Green and St. George for instance – but they are all relatively short in comparison.  They are all really part of the same street – it just doesn’t lead the entire distance as it had over a century ago.

I grew up on the east side of State Street.  I lived in a house marked with an odd number.  We lived on the north side of the street.  I think it’s interesting that I am now living in a house marked with an even number and I am still on the north side – but I live west of State Street and Main and I think the numbering reverses somewhere (the odds and evens are on the opposite sides)

And then there are the occasional afterthoughts – such as a clinic I was trying to find in Sandy.  I was looking for the odd number on the opposite side of the street as my brother and sister-in-law live as they are at an even number – but it turned out it was on the same side.  Maybe that’s where the odd and even numbers change hands.

It’s important to have the right directions assigned to house and street.  If you are looking for 310 W 7930 S and you mix it up and up in 310 S 7930 W, you are looking in the wrong place!  You are way off. 

 

And then there’s a friend of the family whose house number was something like 1831 and yet his neighbors to either side were something like 1927 and 1943.  I often wondered how in the world they were able to get their mail.  So there are definite flaws. But except for those occasional rarities, I rather like using our numbering system.  I prefer the GPS of course – but I don’t remember that existing before this century.