Saturday, November 24, 2012

Chatter Matters . . . especially for Jenna


          In 2000 Mattel distributed a game called Chatter Matters.  I don’t know how the game happened to fall into the hands of Sunny’s family, or if it had been given to a specific child.  But they didn’t seem to enjoy it.

          They left it at my mom’s house without directions.  It’s pretty self explanatory, but I printed the directions anyway.  Jenna absolutely LOVES this game.  We started playing it just this year.


          We must have started in summer when Jenna was off from school.  The game continued to live at Grandma’s house, and that is where we would play it.  Jenna wanted to take the game home.  I told her that it wasn’t ours to take.  But Corey said he thought it would be okay if we did.  But I know Jenna and her lack of ability to clean up after herself and how many game pieces turn up missing.  I fully believed we could make better use of it at my mom’s.
          And after Thanksgiving we brought the game home to live with us.  Not intentionally. But I haven’t bothered to return it – which has been intentional.

          Jenna has always liked answeringquestions and listening to the answers of others.  We would play the ungame  – which isn’t a game but a pocket sized case containing questions.  Questions such as:  “what was your favorite subject in school? and why?”  “Where would you like to go on vacation?”  “What is one quality you admire about each family member?”    



          Each case came with two sets of questions.  The generic easy ones and the more thought provoking ones like: “name an experience involving death”
          I remember asking my dad that one before he passed away.  His Uncle Reese was seventeen when he passed away.  I think my dad was six.  He choked as he answered.  Kayla and I set the cards aside and decided to play something else.

          I don’t know how many years fell between the card packet to the board game (I would guess 14) – though it was still not a “game”.  There were no winners, no losers . . . no definite end. 




          Chatter Matter’s seemed to have many similar questions that were asked in Ungame’s level one – but with a twist.  The board game was designed with four rooms and a deck of cards for each room that would ask questions not necessarily geared toward the room – but may be where you are when you ask yourself the questions that come with the card.




          For example, the bedroom has questions especially geared to the player about his or her personal self like:
“What’s one of the strangest foods I’ve ever eaten?” 
or “If I could travel anywhere, where would I go? For how long? Who would go with me?



          The other players write down answers they believe the card holder will say and for each one that matches, both (or all) receive chips.

The Family room is designed for the player to answer questions about family members:




          “What religion, if any, did one of my parents practice as a child?”
          “What is the name of the first street I lived on?”

          Sometimes the other players will write down their predictions but not always.  The two questions above offers chips for each correct answer.  Helps if you actually have family members playing that can assist with the correct answer.

          Kitchen.  This card will allow you to collect chips for doing chores or will punish you and have you move your game piece to “time out” 
Examples of these are:




          I painted the bathroom.  Go to Chores/Allowance corner and collect

And then the player has an opportunity to talk about a project he or she has done around the house.

            The game room offers a variety of “games” to be played with each card.  Jenna’s favorite is called “Scavenger Hunt”

          It helps if you are familiar with the house of where the game is being played.  You divide into teams and look for whatever is written on the card:

          A receipt
          Something with a player’s name written on it (that could be a monogram or a piece of mail)
          A picture of me and somebody else in my family

          “Verbal Blitz” is the one I like the best.  It is also played in teams.  Three categories are listed on the card.  The player who draws the card selects the category and each team goes back and forth naming off soup flavors, or vegetables, or television shows or whatever happened to be selected, until one team stops or repeats an answer.  Winners get one chip each.




          “Doodles” is a mini version of Pictionary.  Three words are listed on the card (usually household items or chores) and you can draw either a chimney, a kitchen table or a window.  And the first person who guesses correctly gets a chip along with the “artist”

          The last game room play card is called “Home Movies”   Player acts out verbs that are written on the card:

          Riding a bike, skateboarding or skiing for example.

          Each player has a chip holder that will fill with 15 chips.  The first player to have 15 chips wins.  Not a tough game.  But can be long – especially when the players get stuck on a game card.



          I told Jenna that we would play it after our Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday – and we probably would have had it been on top, but Jenna picked another game.  And that was the only one we played as Grandma was getting restless and we needed to remove her from the environment.

          I told her that we could possibly play it after Thursday’s dinner – but everyone else had to agree.  We played Spades instead. 

          So on Friday, when I took her over to Bill and Kayla’s house, we played.  Anna wanted to play with the chip holders and game pieces.  So Bill decided that she would play the game.  So he shook the di for her and asked and answered questions.  Ironically I think Anna won. And Bill declared that it was really a boring game.  I think we could have ended sooner if he hadn’t insisted on taking a turn for Anna (as well as himself) every time (after all she had lost interest long before he did)

          It can get boring.  But so can Monopoly. And given a choice, I’d much rather play Chatter Matters.  And I’m really happy that Jenna really likes it.

Friday, November 23, 2012

Yesterday's Turkey Dinner


          I started this blog on New Years of this year.  I was faithful to write every single day – or almost every day.  But when school ended, so did my once-a-day posts.  My focus had to be on Jenna.  And when school started back up, mom’s memory had deteriorated and so I seemingly started spending more time with her (especially when Corey had gone back to Las Vegas – where he is now registered as a permanent resident in the state of Nevada) and so I still haven’t gotten back to one a day. Perhaps I never will.

          Kayla and her two children met Jenna and me at my mom’s on the Thursday of Thanksgiving.  I had gone because it was my day and we had already celebrated Thanksgiving dinner with the family on the Saturday prior.  Kayla brought her kids because Bill wanted to clean the carpets.

          They had left the house about 1:00 to return home to make dishes for their Thanksgiving dinner with one of Bill’s sisters (the one who lives in Utah) and baby brother. 
          Roland was planning on doing dinner at 3:00 – but time got away from him, I guess.  I boiled potatoes and mashed them.  They were ready at two.  I don’t think I started the gravy until 3:00. 

          At 3:30 Jenna and “Grandma” and I got into the car and drove to my house for dinner.
          Mom seemed to enjoy Thursdays dinner more than the dinner we had on Saturday.  For one thing she was a lot more alert.  For another thing, dinner on Thursday was quite small.  Only five of us.  We had turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, biscuits and rolls, and green beans.  Ice cream for dessert. 
          After we had finished eating, Roland wanted to play spades.  I don’t know if my mom has even played spades before.  And explaining games to her is a chore as it is.  But we went with it.  Explaining the rules every time we dealt. 
          Randy and Carrie had dropped by.  I was surprised to see them.  They had come to see mom.  And Roland decided it would be fun to play spades in teams.  Randy said he wanted to play by himself – and so Roland decided that he would give him grandma’s handicap and would appear that he was playing by himself.
  
          She had bid three tricks at one time when Randy had nothing in his hand.  She probably could have taken them if she had thrown out her lowest spade rather than her highest. 
          When we were down to two cards Kevin leaned across the table and said, “Grandma, I thought you said you had three” (referring to the tricks)

          “I did.  And now I only have two” (referring to the cards left in her hand) everybody at the table (except for Randy and my mom) started laughing. And then mom smiled as the rest of us were laughing.  And Randy stared ahead in unbelief.

          After a few more rounds, Biff volunteered to take grandma home (as I don’t drive at night – otherwise I would have gone)

          It was actually not a good night for Randy (card wise) and actually a better night for me than usual.  When Randy announced that he and Carrie had to go, Biff and I were certain that the only reason why he left was because he was losing.  We both figured if he hadn’t gone so far down into the hole, he would have continued playing.

          Today I will take Jenna with me to Bill and Kayla’s where we will hang for most of the day.  Roland has some work ahead of him that will be accomplished easier if Jenna’s not around.  Plus I would really like to play games with them. 

          Jenna has a possible hair appointment.  I will call at 1:30 to verify.  If not, we will just stay longer with Bill and Kayla.  And if Roland finishes with what he needs to accomplish, maybe Bill and Kayla will come here for some more games afterwards (if I remember to take Roland’s turkey to their house for lunch, that alone could bring Bill back for more)

          I’m grateful that mom had a good day yesterday.  I’m happy to hear that Corey had a wonderful Thanksgiving.  I missed him.  But I’m happy for the opportunities that he has right now to get on with his life in Las Vegas.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Being Grateful


On January 3rd I created a post called “What I’m Grateful for A-Z” There have been oodles of posts on facebook by a number of people expressing gratitude on a daily basis.  I put these in alphabetical order as well.  Some are the same as my answers given three days after I created this post.  I admire so many of the statements given:

Agency:

“I can’t always choose what happens to me, but I can always choose how I’m going to react to it”

“A great sacrifice was made and a divine price was paid.”

“I’m thankful for all the veterans in my life and for all those who have served and continue to serve this great country.”

“passion for our freedoms”

Education:

“this also goes for choice in elementary and secondary schools”

“the ability to learn”

Guidance:

“I am thankful for a living prophet to lead, guide, and direct me”

Health:

“It may not be the best, but I am grateful I’m not a slave to bad health”

Employment:

“I’m grateful for a husband who works as hard as he does to support our family”

“It has saved our bacon this year”

Labor of others to ease the burdens of our everyday lives:

“Thanks to all of the garbage collectors who pick up my garbage weekly”

“the opportunity to donate blood . . . giving the gift of life is an awesome feeling”

Library and Books:

“for without we’d be very poor!”

“Thank you, Benjamin Franklin, for providing a system for us to check out books”

Music:

“Music is an impact on so many different levels”

Opportunity to vote:

“I am thankful that I live in a country where I can freely vote J It is a gift”

“women who fought to give us the right to vote and exercise that right”

Positive Attitudes:

“I need to adapt that pleasantness into my own life”

Religion:

“I am thankful for the help and support my Heavenly Father provides on that journey”

Shelter:

“My house may be small, but at least I’m not homeless”

“Even when I complain that I have to clean it, at least I have one to clean”

Spouse, family, friends and reasons why

Trials:

“It makes me a stronger person because I choose to face my trial and do something about it!”

“. . . the ability to get things done”

Material things:

 “ . . . Let’s just be honest.  This world is a much better place because of chocolate”

Nail Clippers, Snow blowers, telephones

Weather:

"Snow", "Awesome Fall"

"Wonderful sunshine"

“Grateful for the seasons. I think we've experienced all 4 in the last week....”

Others:

Art, Hugs, Laughter, Loyalty

Leftovers

Modern Medicine and Technology
Being prepared
Peace and Quiet Sight, Sleep

Another post:

“Just sayin' - I love reading everyone's gratitude posts! Makes me smile”

And the one that got me smiling earlier in the month:

That the elections are over!”

And at this time I am very grateful to be able to compact all of my memories in a space more reliable and even smaller than my brain.
I’m grateful for photos and written words that Jenna and Kayla’s children may be able to know the same grandma that Patrick’s children had the opportunity of knowing.


Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Another Visit with Mom


She had just finished eating when I arrive.
I don’t bother to ask if she has checked her blood.
We go for a walk.
I point to a house where a family had lived
Many years ago.
I asked if she remembers.
She says that she does.  That’s good.
She didn’t have a clue on Saturday.
I take her to my house to eat lunch.
I put her at the computer while I prepare the food.
She enjoys viewing the pictures that Kayla had taken
And had posted to facebook.
I make some suggestions on how to complete the day
I ask if there is anywhere in particular where she would like to go.
She says she wants to go home. Just home.
Her mother was a homebody, too.
I take her back home with a reminder that I will have to leave again.
I have to go pick Jenna up from school.  I’d like her to go with me.
She doesn’t want to go.
Just as I’m about to leave, I decide I will call Nate and ask if he could pick up Jenna.
Nate married my niece.  They live in mom’s basement.
Mom is overwhelmed at the idea of my knowing Nate
And having his phone number is such a foreign concept to her.
Why would I have Nate’s phone number?
I cannot get a hold of him.  According to her, it’s just as well
How would he even recognize Jenna?
I look at her as though she has sprouted horns
I end up driving to Jenna’s school while mom takes a nap
Or so she claims.
Nate opens the door when Jenna and I return
Mom seems a little more with it than she had been after lunch.
She seemed fine before lunch.
Nate says he has to run an errand
Jenna hands me a sheet of paper and orders me to write a story
“What story?”
I’m so not in the mood for making up something
“I will tell you”
As she starts in with her own story of an alien visiting a factory she sees that I am
using a pen and writing in cursive
“Use a pencil, mom.  And don’t write in cursive!”
“You write it with a pencil.”
“Okay, fine.”
She gets another piece of paper and says she will write her story but now I have to write my own.
Grandma dismisses herself so she can “look outside for a minute”
I stop writing. One of us has to watch her.
Jenna and I take turns watching mom standing in the driveway observing the sky
And then she walks into the back yard expecting the weather will change.
It doesn’t.  She comes inside and announces that she would like to take a walk
but that it’s just too windy.
Personality number three.
Instantly she becomes another person as she retrieves her puzzle book and hunts for words.
Jenna and I continue writing.
Mine is a Christmas story.  Unpolished.
I will post it next month.  Most likely it will still be unpolished.
Nate returns. Jenna and I leave mom’s house to return home. 
Still worried about my mom.

Monday, November 19, 2012

“Brave” and the Liahona




         Roland and I took mom to the movies after our Saturday Thanksgiving dinner.  We chose “Brave” because it was the shortest wait.  Mom enjoyed it which in itself made it worth it.   I felt intrigued by the parallels that seemed unfold – for me anyway.

          Merida is typical of many teens – many who have gone beyond teen hood but still place more faith in self than  a higher being.

          Merida’s mother attempts to prepare Merida for the role of princess and what expectations are included and what the future holds – none of which fit into Merida’s own plans of “freedom” of expressing herself, of taking on adventures without the hassles of trying to please everyone by fulfilling a role that is clearly NOT the fate she would choose for herself.

          The story incorporates the legend ofthe wisp

          “The will o' the wisp definition if we could actually define it would go something like this: a supernatural luminescent, flickering or dancing white to blue light occasionally seen over bodies of water, in meadows, and in forests . . . There has been a lot of theories as to what the will o' the wisp meaning or message really is. As previously mentioned, many people in Scotland, Ireland, and England thought that the will o' the wisp was actually lights emanating from fairies.” -   It is the “wisp” that Merida follows with the belief that it will change her fate.

          When she meets a witch who agrees to give her a spell, she is guaranteed that her fate will indeed be changed. Right away I figured that her fate would indeed be changed – but not in the way Merida had hoped or expected.

          Often we think that we want our lives to go a certain way – or perhaps it is expected of some of us to follow in the footsteps of the family business or practice.  Perhaps it’s expected of some to make the most of his or her education.  And perhaps there are many who feel that restrictions have been placed upon them and that freedoms have been taken away.  We seek a path that is pleasing to us and follow our hearts or the legendary “wisps” or perhaps we turn to a more powerful source.  Perhaps we acknowledge deity and ask for assistance to take us down the road of our desires.

          Like the witch in “Brave” our Father does provide us with assistance, often sending us tools that we may “grow” our own blessings.  But often we don’t realize that what has been “planted” is not at all what we had asked for – or thought we had asked for rather.  Often we are given a different path, or another direction and must go with it in faith and do our best to understand why we have been placed in a certain position, when really, that is not we asked for at all.  Or did we?

          The following day I was to give the lesson in our youth class.  I had read the lesson, tried pondering it, tried studying, but it just wasn’t coming together for me.  It’s not that my understanding of the material was limited (as is often the case) but just seemed that it would be majorly short if I didn’t get the participation that I needed.

          I may have mentioned it before – only I can’t find where – we have only one youth.  In addition there is the other class instructor and two of the young men instructors (one who is married to the instructor that I alternate lessons with) and a brother who would like lessons as they are simplified to the youth.

          I wasn’t well prepared.  The lesson itself was on the name of the church (3 Nephi 27), the desires of the twelve disciples (3 Nephi 28), and the pride cycle (4 Nephi).  I can’t remember why Bro. Basic brought up the Liahona  – but Jack held up his Ipad and said that it was the Liahona.  And the Young Men leaders ran with it.



Jed compared it to the compass used by Lehi and his family and pointed out that the Ipad or smart phone can be used for direction just as a compass.  We can choose to follow in faith or we can be misguided by our own weakness or pride.  We can find tools that will help us on the path to eternal life or we can find paths that may lead us to destruction.  I had never thought of that before.  I thought it was a cool analogy.

I feel quite blessed to be serving a calling in which I am learning more from the class members than I imagine they can be learning from me.  I feel quite blessed with the class participation and the profound thoughts that help me simplify and better understand things.

I feel blessed too to view things in a way that many people may not.  Such as finding God’s message hidden in a Disney/Pixar animation. That was definitely not intended.

I’m grateful for analogies and parables and those who are gifted with words to speak to the intelligent but also explain things on a “Dick and Jane level that I too may understand.

I’m grateful there are those who can translate Isaiah.  I still don’t grasp all of it.  There are some who have viewed me as one who is knowledgeable in the scriptures.  There is a lot that I do understand.  But there is even more that I don’t.

I’m grateful that we have wisps and Liahona’s in our lives to guide us if we will but have the faith to follow.   I'm grateful that there is a force greater than ourselves who really does know best.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Untraditional Thanksgiving



The thing I enjoyed most about Thanksgiving was that each year was spent with a different group of people than the year before – not always.  For the most part our Thanksgiving dinners were intimate.  10 -12 people.  Nothing overwhelming like the 30+ number that my neighbor from across the street likes to have.  The more, the merrier – or so is her opinion.  I prefer less people.

          Sometimes we would enjoy the Thanksgiving holidays with various neighbors.  Sometimes extended family.  Sometimes just us.  Each one different.  Each one with positive memories.

          I recall one year spending it with a couple who had two children.  I think mom and dad had only three at the time.  The movie, The Jazz Singer (the version with Neal Diamond as Jess Robin), had just gone to the dollar theatre.  It was part of a double feature.  The other movie was Scrooge.  Our neighbor, Mary, LOVED the Jazz Singer and I still love the musical Scrooge. 



         So after our dinner we went to the theatre to see both movies.  I believe it was the only time I had ever gone to the movies on Thanksgiving Day.




          Mom’s neighbor from across the street LOVES Thanksgiving.  Her idea of a perfect Thanksgiving is having dinner with OODLES of people.  30, 50 – though not always an overwhelming amount, I think it is the norm.  We’ve probably had dinner with their family at least five times during my life time. And it hasn’t always been with all of the same people.

          I remember having Thanksgiving dinner with my dad’s family one time.  We had gone to my aunt’s apartment.  We usually didn’t spend Thanksgiving as all of us.  My dad’s brother spent the holidays with my aunt’s family.  But there was that at least that one time.  It was a long time before Corey or Kayla.

          After Patrick got married, they would often alternate holidays – spending every other Thanksgiving with her family and then Christmas with ours and vise-versa.  One year when they’d gone out of town, we asked my dad’s sister and her family to come spend Thanksgiving with us.  The year my dad passed away, we drove out of state with Patrick and Sunny to spend the holidays with her family.

          The thing I love the most about Thanksgiving is we get to spend it with a new group of people pretty much every year.  It may seem nontraditional to do it that way.  But it’s truly what I enjoy most about Thanksgiving.

          This year we had Thanksgiving dinner (lunch) the Saturday prior to Thanksgiving.  We held it at the Church building that Patrick and Sunny attend.  Sunny had decorated the table so nicely.  18 chairs had been set up and each family contributed to the meal. Kayla made her first sweet potato pie ever.  Corey really missed out with that one.

 Each of us had also brought games to play.  My family ended up playing only one.  My mom was becoming more and more restless and Roland and I took her and Jenna to the movies.  It was nice to hear my mom enjoying the movie.  I thought she’d nod off but she didn’t. 

We missed Corey this year, but I am grateful that he has the opportunity to spend the holidays with his honey (for a change).  I am grateful for our non-traditional Thanksgivings.  And I am grateful for my families and for Sunny who seems to hold us all together.

Friday, November 16, 2012

The Faith of a Child



          It was 5:30 when we received a frantic knock on the door.  Jenna dismissed herself thinking it was the next door neighbor who had already dismissed himself three times when he did not get his way.  I had thought the same thing – but at the same time it was a more aggressive knock – one of panic not childish play.

          Jorge’s mother had a worried look in her eyes, “Is Jorge here?” she asked hopefully.

          “No, I’m sorry.  I haven’t seen him.  Did he come home from school?”
          “No.”
          Jorge and Jenna don’t even go to the same school.  I had no clue how to help her.  Her cell phone drowned out my question, “How can I help?”

          I worried along with Jorge’s mom.  And Jenna worried with me. 
          “What can we do?” she asked.
          “We can pray.”

          I said the prayer and pondered what to do – I didn’t even know their last name.  Before involving anyone else, I thought it would be better if I had more information to share.

I do know where they live.  So Jenna and I walked over to their house.  Jorge’s mother opened the door – Relieved and Happy.  She’d found Jorge!  I don’t know where he’d been.  The cell phone went off again and she jabbered into it in her native tongue.  Jenna and I excused ourselves. 

          As Jorge’s mother closed the door, Jenna said, “Well, I guess our prayer worked.”

Get into the Groove Already . . . you Stubborn Lid




          Earlier in summer this year, I had gone with my ward on a canning assignment and decided that once school had started that I would put in 3-9 hours of volunteer work at the cannery once each month.  Thus far I haven’t made it to five hours.  But I am proud to say that I have been at least once a month.
          The only shift I can do currently is the 11-2 and I can only go on a Monday or a Wednesday as I am with mom on Tuesday and Thursday and Friday is normally Jenna’s short day and gets out of school just after one.

          I had actually gone to the cannery last week, but the machine had broken down or something.  When I arrived it appeared they already had thirty volunteers waiting to fulfill assignment.

          In the past I have noticed too many people can present just as many problems as not enough.  I opted to return home – which actually turned out to be a blessing on my end.  I’d forgotten about fall break, and Jenna walked in the house at 1:30.  I would have felt bad if she had returned to an empty house with no clue about where I might be.



          In summer, when I was with my ward, I noticed three that had been assigned to fastening lids on jars.  Oh, I was so relieved not to have put on that job.  Ironically, that has been the position I have been given every time I’ve gone (with two exceptions) and it’s really not as bad as I had made it out to be – except for today.
         
          I was having so much trouble getting the lid to fasten.  But it actually wasn’t just me – we all had problems with them.  At first it just seemed to be Eve and I who were struggling.  There didn’t seem to be as much struggle for Jean and Kris – who were grabbing lids from another box.

          I decided that it was the lids.  They must have been nicked or flawed or something.  Steve – who is an actual employee and not just a volunteer – picked up a couple of lids to redo a couple of jars that had been missed (and I take full responsibility)



          Ideally there are supposed to be three people for the jar lids.  The first is to fasten jars number 3 and 6, the second 2 and 5 and the last one should be able to do 1 and 4.  But sometimes we have four.  And Jean would usually do two jars along with Eve and Kris leaving me with very little to do (Jean would sometimes let a jar slide on purpose so that I would be able to have the opportunity) until Penny came in and took Jean’s place (Jean had been there since 9:30) and appeared to be having more trouble twisting the lids than I was.

          Sometimes the lid would escape from her.  A few had become flying saucers.  At least a couple soared over my knee before crash landing into the floor. Some remained on the conveyor belt and took a ride along with the jars that were full of applesauce.

          There was one time I was doing Salsa with a team of Polynesian background.  I don’t know if they were holding a contest among themselves or if they each thought it was their duty to personally make the day’s quota.  Pekelo would do bottles 2, 4, 5 and 6.  And Kalani would do bottles 1 and 3.  I was lucky if I was able to do one in 18 jars – seriously.

          Today we did applesauce and the last time I volunteered, it was honey.  Now that was cool watching the forklifts bring in the one and a half tons of honey and then see it get sucked out from a tube and enter the machine.  Fascinating.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Doogie Howser in Hunter Orange




DoogieHowser ran from September of 1989 to March of 1993.  I have actually never seen an episode.  I remembered seeing previews for it.  But the entire concept of this teenage doctor was just so bizarre – I couldn’t imagine spending time watching it.  I’m quite surprised it was actually on for four seasons.

          I have been a consumer in several stores throughout my life.  The older I get, the younger the clerks become.  Too often I will encounter those who seem clueless, who seem to have no sense of direction with customer relations, who look at me as though I’ve sprouted horns or am talking in a foreign tongue.  I refer to those kids as “fetuses”

          There have been a few, however, that just “look” younger than they are, but speak with such maturity and sophistication that they sound much older than they look. (I think Neil Patrick Harris looked way younger than fourteen when the show started) It is the male population of these wise that I have nicknamed “Doogie Howser”.

          There is a handful of Doogie Howsers in my ward.  I guess they seem so much younger to me because the average age in the ward is above 70 – and those that I dub as Doogie Howsers are all in their 20’s – though this one in particular appears to be younger than any of my boys but as we’ve lived in the ward for three years – and he has lived here with his wife in all that time, I know that he’s older than my youngest two and probably my eldest.



          Wade’s worn his hunter orange cardigan to Church a couple of times.  One can’t help but notice as it is truly bright.  The last time he had worn it while blessing the sacrament I was reminded of a situation that Corey related to me – he was told that he would not be able to participate in blessing the sacrament as he was wearing a purple shirt.  Really?

          I understand steering away from casual wear – out of respect to our Creator – at the same time we don’t KNOW the reasons that people wear (or don’t wear) what they do.  Corey happens to like the color purple – and he looked nice in his non-traditional Sunday suit.  He wanted his own identity – his individual worth.  But nobody had asked if that was the case . . .



          Maybe all his white shirts had been damaged in the washing machine when it broke down.  Maybe the purple shirt was the only one that fit.  We don’t know.  Wade may be wearing his orange cardigan for whoever bought it.  It’s definitely an attention getter, and he teaches Jack – our only young men aged youth.  Maybe Jack listens better when he has that sweater glaring at him.  Or maybe he can’t find his suit jacket and the cardigan is warm.

          In my last ward there was a persnickety Pharisee who harped on the dress code almost every week.  I think she was offended that there had been a few show up in jeans or more casual wear and wouldn’t even make an effort to dress another way.  Wouldn’t it be more important to Jesus to have his children show up than stay away due to a strict dress code?

          I’m not bothered by it – but I know some people are.  Another example is a counselor to the bishop came dressed in jeans.  It’s all he had.  His wife had passed away that week and no one had picked his suit up at the cleaners.  He was conducting.  With emotion, he announced his own wife’s upcoming funeral.

          I don’t normally wear panty hose – even to the temple.  My legs chafe.  I’m certain that God understands.  He is, after all, the one that gave me my overly sensitive skin.

          I know some people get lazy.  Some become wrapped up in their own thoughts that they forget why others are dressed up. But I know the Savior would still welcome them with a smile.  He would even allow them to bless and pass the sacrament knowing their worth and worthiness lies on the inside and not outward appearance.

          I am grateful for those who are willing to embrace others just because they are there. For those who don’t pass judgment.  For those who accept.




Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Liberty Mutual NEEDS to STOP Calling My Mom


          Mom has been tested for Alzheimer’s at least twice.  We’ve been told that she doesn’t have it. But she does have some form of dementia.  A distorted memory loss.  Some days she’s been there, others she has not.  For the most part it seems she’s been elsewhere – first on exotic vacations and then sharing her childhood and teenage years in San Francisco.   She just didn’t seem to be anywhere today. 

          She was just finishing the dishes when she let me inside.  I greeted her and asked if she had taken her blood.  She had to process the information as she always does when I ask the question.  She said she hadn’t.  I then asked her if she’d eaten breakfast.  She said she had.  And so I told her that we’d have to wait in order to get a proper reading.  She looked at me with childish eyes and confessed that she had forgotten how. 

          She said that she needed to go to the store.  She said that she wanted to purchase some cough drops – a large bag of them.  I took her to Sam’s Club as they sell items in bulk and would have more cough drops offered in their packaging than the regular stores.

          The mail usually doesn’t come until I’m just about to leave – or when I’m pulling out of the driveway.  But today it was early.  Very early.  I guess because of having had off Veteran’s Day yesterday?  What a boatload of mail, too.

          Mom dismissed herself to go to the bathroom, and I hurriedly fingered through the mail and pulled out mail from various charities and Capitol One and set them aside to go through later to make certain it really was all junk.  It was. 

          Corey received five pieces of mail.  I’m certain that two of those could have been trashed as well.  But mom insisted he needed it all and we ended up going to the post office as she’d put it all in a large manila envelope.  Note to self:  make up labels to give to mom so that she can just forward Corey’s mail without having to pay for it.  Even after I show her, she could still forget why she has all these labels with Corey’s name and address.

          We drove passed the school that my sibs and I had all attended.  Mom says, “There is the school that I went to . . . that’s probably the same one that you went to.”

          “Yes.  I went to that school.”  She didn’t.  Not as a student anyway.  It wasn’t even built until 35 years after she was born.

         We were going through Taboo cards trying to get each other to guess the words on our cards.  I explained how to play it a few times. Each time she would answer the phone  I would have to re-explain.  

         One of the calls that she received was from Liberty Mutual.  According to her, they call on a weekly basis.  It is never a human being.  It is always a machine asking to press this number or that number.  Why doesn't she just hang up on them?  What is Liberty Mutual thinking to have a machine call their clients?  How many of those clients are capable of pushing the correct numbered button? 

         Mom showed me her supply that came from Liberty Mutual.  She's set for a while.  They don't need to call every day or every week or every month.  She's good.  Seriously.  She isn't in the right frame of mind or patience to be pushing buttons.

          We finished the puzzle book that she and Kayla had started.  And so we left the house again to purchase some puzzle book replacements. They seem to be helping.

          We had started the third puzzle when I excused myself to return home.  She seemed disappointed.  But expressed gratitude for having had come. I needed that.

          I want my mom back.

That Jacket’s been around for quite some time



          Roland tried his hand at working for U-Haul probably about twelve years ago or so.  He ordered his U-Haul coat and worked for two weeks.  The job didn’t challenge him in any way and he just didn’t want to stay mainly because he felt bored.  He saw no advancement.  But he had paid for his coat, and so he kept it.



          It’s been a great coat.  I think all of us have worn it at one time or another.  It’s got the feel of a jacket, but is warm like a coat.



          But after many years, Roland decided to invest in a more stylish coat.  He got it on sale one year between four and six in the morning on a black Friday.  And it is a nice coat.  Warmer than his U-Haul.  It’s a heavy hyde-skin looking coat. I call it his Indian coat or trapper coat.  He still wears his UHaul for the most part as he  can’t seem to move in the other as freely.  And so he keeps them both.

         Currently the coat resides in Biff's closet.  I don't know why.  I haven't ever seen him wear it since before we moved.  Maybe he doesn't know it's in his closet. I bet Roland doesn't know.