It’s been a couple of months since I took Jenna
and her friend to see The Mysterious Happy
Life of Brown Bag by Greg Near. I honestly did not know what it was about –
but it was playing at the library and gave us something to do for free.
It started out cute and funny. Jaime, Trume and I all laughed. Towards the end though, they both got bored
with it and I don’t think they realized what had even taken place. The one act play had taken me from laughter
to tears in just a matter of seconds.
Brown Bag had been bullied because he was different. He so desperately wished to have friends that
he allowed them to manipulate him – even though he knew that because they were
trying to hurt him, they really weren’t his friends.
After the play the cast members and writer and
some others held a discussion panel.
Trume and Jenna both wanted to leave – which I understood. It’s not a comfortable subject. But I thought
it was important that we stay and get some feedback.
So many of the children (what little there are)
that surround us are from broken homes and dysfunctional families and perhaps
it’s just what they’ve learned from their own surrounding circumstances and
upbringings. I wouldn’t classify any of
them as bullies (just yet anyway) though there are a few that have been able to
manipulate Jenna.
Jenna had always been the leader when we lived in
our first part. Yes, she was a bit
manipulative – but in a positive way.
She never tried to hurt her friends.
She never tried to seek pleasure by embarrassing another or enjoying
watching others get into trouble or what have you. She’s just always had a head full of great
ideas and would strongly suggest that her friends play her games. But they always had fun together. There was never anything cruel about her
domination.
Over here things are different. She has somehow allowed herself to get sucked
up into things that she hasn’t been comfortable doing – and I repeatedly tell
her to stand up for herself and not to get sucked in. A real friend wouldn’t allow a friend to feel
uncomfortable. I’ve used my own examples
as well as referring to The Mysterious
Happy Life of Brown Bag and repeatedly asking if she remembers what
happened to him.
I used to worry about Tony, too. Tony has always seemed socially awkward
(actually, both two oldest boys have) and I was afraid he would fall in with
the wrong crowd. He is swayed so easily.
Even as an adult I think he is easily manipulated. I’ve always wished that he
would stand up for himself and not allow others to walk all over him. But he has been walked on a lot.
Jenna and I are over here to learn something. I don’t know what it is. Gratitude perhaps. Because right now we are not very grateful. I’m finally comfortable in my own ward, but
not with the neighborhood. Not with
Jenna’s friends (or lack thereof)
I don’t deal well with bullying. I am so upset with the results and the
pain. Manipulation needs to vanish.
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