The Truth About Santa

 

Almost every year since we moved to West Valley, Roland will ask, “When should we tell Jenna about Santa Clause” 

I always answer, “Tell her what?”

“There’s no such thing as Santa”

“What do you mean?”

He gives me a look.

“Roland.  I believe in Santa.  I have been Santa.  And we have been recipients of Santa a huge amount of times.  What do you mean there’s no such thing as Santa?”

“We need to tell Jenna that you and I are the ones who put the presents out.”

“Oh . . . why?”

“You don’t want her to be the only one in third, forth, fifth grade to still believe.”

“Tony is 23, 24, 25 and he still believes in Santa Clause. I’m 48, 49 . . . and I still believe.”

Another rolling of the eyes.

Media warns us about targeted homes during this time of the year.  Robbed of Christmas by thieves.  We left the house around 2:30 and did not return until after 8:30.  We had always done Christmas Eve at mom’s house.  Perhaps a few times at Patrick and Sunny’s.  But I did not spend Christmas with my sibs last year.  Each had made obligations with other people.  Roland, Jenna, Biff and I spent Christmas Eve with mom.

This year Randy took it upon himself to host the family gathering on Christmas Eve.  All three Romero boys with their wives, our granddaughter Ester, Roland, Jenna and I gathered at the home of Randy and Carrie.  We spent some time together before exchanging gifts – something we had always done with mom.

Before we left for Randy and Carrie's house I turned on the light in the backroom and plugged in the Christmas tree.  I prayed that we would not become a target of thievery.  Upon our return home we discovered the opposite.  Instead of taking (or stealing) gifts, someone had left two bags full of presents.  FULL.  I think it is the third or forth time we’ve returned home to find presents left on our door step (though the first time in this house) Santa also left this note:

I would have thought Jenna herself had done it just to prove a point.  But of course she couldn’t have.

“See daddy.  Santa is real,” she said to Roland.  
 Just moments later she asked me, “Why doesn’t daddy believe in Santa Clause?”

“I don’t know.  I have explained it to him just as I have with you.”

When Jenna was six I told her that Santa does not always wear red.  He doesn’t necessarily have a white beard or a very large belly.  Sometimes Santa is not even male nor does he always appear in the winter time.  Sometimes “Santa” may leave a sack of groceries on your doorstep in the summer or leave a coat or warm blanket for you in the fall.  Santa goes by many different names.  And he likes to remain anonymous.

 

Many have commercialized Christmas. Santa becomes a symbol of selling product – the commercialized Santa.  Not the Spirit of Santa – or the Spirit of Christ.  When one gives secretly. Santa is a symbol of Christ.  I sincerely believe that.

Roland and I purchased the game “Operation” and Jenna had picked out a pair of shoes that were on close out.  She said we could wrap them and put them under the tree. Those were the only two things that we had purchased for Jenna.  Now (I kid you not) there are about 30 presents under the tree just for her – at least I think they are for her.  Santa put tags on all of the wrapped items but neglected to put names on any of the tags – and so we will just have Jenna open all gifts with no names and let her divvy them out as she sees fit.

Roland’s mom has sent gifts in the past, but I recall our second year in WV there was nothing in the mail from her.  I wasn’t upset about it, but I was surprised.  As Christmas got closer, I hadn’t given it much thought.  

Biff and Tony were both living at home (Randy was on his mission) and things were tight that year.  I think we purchased three small gifts for each person.  I had placed them beneath the tree before 10:00 (first visit from Santa) 

When I awoke the next morning, there was 3-4 times the amount of presents than there had been when I went to bed.  Tony had a generous heart that year and decided that he would play Santa (2^nd visit) and Biff (who had spent two weeks in August with Roland’s family) had placed gifts beneath the tree from Roland’s family and Santa (3^rd visit) That year was definitely full of surprises.

We have been blessed immensely.  I hope to play Santa to others the way others have played Santa to our family.  Although when we have been the recipients our gifts seem to outweigh anything that Roland and I have done on our own.  Jenna’s going to be overwhelmed.  I know I am.  It's kind of like mom and dad stopped by to surprise us - but of course I think tangible gifts had to have come from a tangible being.  Perhaps someone related to mom and dad? 

 

Good Luck Getting Out . . .

I don’t know which is worse – the Saturday before Christmas or the Friday after Thanksgiving.  I don’t enjoy shopping or trying things on or waiting in line or crowds or winter or parking or all the fragrances and plants which flare up my allergies.  Before I met Roland, I always had my Christmas shopping done by September –ALWAYS

And then I met a man with a sporadic income, a greedy ex-wife, and a judicial system that sucks big time – you think we would have done better at spreading things out.  But we were struggling for our needs and so wants were ALWAYS on the back burner.

I don’t know if Roland has always been procrastinastic about Christmas shopping.  As I mentioned before, he’s got a great heart.  He is always thinking of others.  But he doesn’t spend wisely for the most part.

I opted to go shopping with him and Jenna yesterday – not that I really wanted to, but I wanted to get him a winter scarf because he asked for one – not necessarily did I particularly want him to see my purchase,.  I figured I could make my purchase while he was occupied over something else.  Fat chance of that.  As though he wouldn’t have noticed me standing in line for the duration.  In order to make a purchase, one had to stand in line.  And they were all slow-moving lines.  But I never found a scarf (and I have been looking) and so a purchase wasn't even made. 

The forecasters promised snowy weather like we had on Thursday and I thought that might keep many off the roads – which is usually the case.  I think when the weather is challenging for drivers is when Roland enjoys shopping the most.  But the weather was not near as bad as it had been Thursday or even December 3^rd.  Most roads were clear – can’t say the same for the parking lots however.

My main reason for going with Roland was to keep an eye on the budget.  He wanted to make purchases within the mall.  I told him NO.  I told him to drive to K-Mart where we ended up purchasing several items – but not all.

There is one purchase he had in mind that would require a specific store.  And so we ended up at the same mall as last week.  The parking lot resembled a line for hell. I told him that although the particular item we had come for really was a necessity and not just a luxury, it could wait until after Christmas.  But he was insistent as we had already driven the distance.

First off there was a line just to get in to the parking lot.  And then there was the endless searching for a parking spot – even the ones that were farthest from the mall itself.  There were several cars that were found trapped between two others (the snow must have covered the lines when they were parked) and I’ll bet the drivers of said cars were not pleased to have to wait in order to get out (I honestly don’t think a tow truck could have gotten in to tow)

 

Roland dropped Jenna and me off by one of the anchor stores and said he would go find parking.  I told him he should drive either behind the mall or over by the empty Sears.  (see this post) But it seems rare for Roland to ever take me up on my parking suggestions.  

So Jenna and I walked through the door in search of a mall directory – which I know exists as Roland had just checked it out last week.  A great mesh of mall traffic was seen.  Oh, joy to the world (that’s meant to be read in the most sarcastic way) Several stores had sent salesmen out into the mall to pass out “free” samples in order to lure potential costumers in for product.  

For the first time in my life I wasn’t targeted for my hair – but rather for my skin.  Very cute guy – heartthrob for either sex.  He gave me my sample told me how amazing it is for dry skin.  Oh, wait.  He also has something for the dark circles under my eyes.  It’s not as if he had to search for them. No one has to look hard to find my dark circles.  I look like a raccoon.  And so he waves me in to demonstrate his assortment of skin products.

  

 

Okay, I must admit I was a bit turned on that this young stud was touching my face – though I would have been fine with it if it had been Roland doing the touching.  He called me to find out where I was and I gave him directions.  When he appeared, I believed the stud was more interested in Roland than me and was hoping to demonstrate products on him as well (or maybe there was just some radar detection that lets every salesman within a million mile radius now that Roland is a pushover about buying whereas I keep the money purse under lock and key)

So after he applies the dark circle cream – which I realize won’t work over night with just one application – he had me hold out my wrist to demonstrate the marvelous face conditioner that would become “baby bottom” soft if I would but invest in the product.  But “act today I can get the eye cream as a free gift.”

The skin softener definitely made a difference.  I asked if it would work on feet.  No, that needed a different product for that.  He whipped out a tube that he could also include as a “free” gift with a purchase of whatever he had just rubbed on my wrist.

I told him that I would not be able to invest until January – if at all (I’m thinking this is my third time to the mall this year – chances are very promising that I won’t be visiting as often next year) He asked if I would I really wait until January if I was told I would only have to pay 10.00 for the whole lot?  I told him I could do ten dollars.  He said it was more than that.  BIG SURPRISE!

He asked how much I thought it cost.  He had absolutely no idea how much I hate sales tactics and guessing games.  I guessed 100.00.  He said he could give it to me for an amazing cost if I promised not to tell anyone.  Oh, give me a break.  Like I am the only potential client that anyone at the store has ever received such promise.  I wasn’t going to buy product no matter how sweet his offer.  There are still several needs above the wants.

He said he could give me everything (I think there were four or five products on the line by that time) for only 49.00.  Not happening, Joe, but thanks.  I think another salesman had called him over.  I left.  Less than two minutes later my wrist felt liked it had been dipped in acid.  Did I fail to mention I have super sensitive skin?

I do think Roland would have overspent if I hadn’t been wit him.  He would have paid mall overhead prices for one thing. But it turned out, it was I that became the guilty party.  It wasn’t on cosmetics but a new bed base as we’ve been sleeping on a broken one for some time. No more tossing and turning.  Roland and I will both sleep so much better at night.  It was actually an expensive purchase (for us) but one that will be well worth it in the long run.  I’m looking forward to when it’s delivered and set up.

Killer Snow

            Shortly after we moved to West Valley, Jenna started hanging at Alley’s house.  Every once in a while Alley and her brother came over to our house, but usually Jenna went to theirs.  I don’t know why they stopped playing together.  But they haven’t been hanging around together for at least a couple of years.

 

Jenna and I were waiting for the bus on Tuesday morning when Alley’s mom offered to drive us to school. Her oldest attends the same junior high that Jenna will be attending.  She had already dropped him off but seemed willing to make another trip.  She said she was also willing to pick her up from school – and the junior high gets out at least an hour before the elementary school does.

So yesterday she picked Jenna up and took her to school and we picked her up last night.  Today brought the killer snow, and she was still willing to drive us. But as her children get out of school only five minutes after Jenna and the weather was awful I told her we would find another way for coming home.

Jenna had a pair of jelly shoes that she wanted to wear to the school performance today – one that I had planned to attend.  I told her to put her jelly shoes in her backpack and she could wear them to the concert but that she needed her boots on to wear to school and that she could change.   

I didn’t know whether I should just hang out at the school all day or return home for an hour and a half and attempt to catch a bus back to the school. But when Jenna got out of the car I realized she still had her jellys on and that I would have to return home for her boots (as the falling snow STILL hasn’t stopped)

The distance between Jenna’s school and our house is 10 min by car, 20 min by bus – except for snow days, which are more than an hour.  I waited for an early bus for nearly half an hour.  When I checked the time 20 minutes before her program started, I realized I would not get there on time, as it was some distance between the bus stop and the front of the school.  So I turned around and went home and figured I would return to catch a bus that would get me to the school hopefully between 12:30 and 1:00.

 

As I waited, I watched the news.  Top stories and breaking news were all weather related.  Airport closed.  Power poles snapped and caught on fire.  Many many many without power currently.

I boarded a bus that arrived on time.  Traffic was slow getting to the intersection.  After that the bus seemed to speed up and actually had to wait at two stops as he had arrived ahead of schedule.  I was the only passenger on the bus between my house and the school.

I was able to climb the street to her school in less than 15 minutes.  I was surprised when I walked through the school doors and noticed the clock.  School wouldn’t be out for another hour.  But she didn’t wish for me to check her out early.

 

As we were waiting for the bus, Jenna had to play in the snow banks, of course.  She lost a boot in the process.  I told her the bus was about to turn and she worked at tugging her foot free.  After she got to the bus stop she realized that her boots didn’t match (one was just lining) and her boot was still in the snow.  She managed to rescue it before the bus arrived – just in the nick of time.

 

We usually take the main road to/from school but on the return today we tried something different.  After school we took a route that required 3 transfers.  Outrageous, right?  And yet that route took less than 30 minutes.  Unbelievable!  It took the same amount of time to walk (or should I say trudge rather) as it did to ride.  We were home only an hour after school let out – instead of the 2 ½ it took with the last snowfall that lasted all day.

I actually saw more plows out on the roads last time.  I don’t think the weather issues were as severe on the 3^rd of December as they are today.  Perhaps the closed roads had delayed the bus I’d been waiting for this morning.  

I shoveled the sidewalks and driveway upon my return.  A neighbor assisted with the endless task.  I hope it’s still low enough as to where Roland can get in the driveway.

 

Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda . . . Time Machine

“And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness.  I give unto men weaknesses that they may be humble; . . .” Ether 12:27

How many of us wish we had a time machine that we might have opportunity for do over.  If only I had made a different choice.  If only I had spent more time (and probably money) perhaps we could have found our runaway dog.  I wish I had been a more positive influence when Roland’s girls came to visit.  I wish I hadn’t left Jenna in all day kindergarten after we moved.

Regrets are demons if we allow ourselves to dwell on what could have been instead of just moving on.  Perhaps we may learn from or see growth from what it is we think we’d like to change.  Allow me to use Jenna’s kindergarten experience as an example.

The school by our first house offered two all-day kindergarten classes.  There were few parents who desired just half day.  The instructors were able to devote more time to their students and the children learned more than they would have in half day.  That is what I was used to.  That is what I wanted to continue with.

But we didn’t necessarily have that option at the second school.  The all day kindergarten program was definitely NOT the same.  I didn’t know that.  Either it hadn’t been explained to me or I just wasn’t listening or I hadn’t understood.  Nor had I prayed about my decision to put her in all day kindergarten.  But even if I had, would the results have been any different?

Jenna LOVED her first school and she tried loving her second.  But she was as a disadvantage as she was so much smarter than the other children who didn’t know how to accept Jenna.  I don’t think they were mean to her necessarily, but they certainly weren’t friendly.  Jenna felt so alone – which she would have in half day as well, but it would have been fewer hours at school and more time with me teaching her at home.

I’ve known all along that it was/is stupid to have this regret.  It has already happened.  I can’t change it.  And yet I realize that without the tragedy of how Jenna and I each felt about her education (or rather lack of) that we would most likely not be where we are today.  For without that experience I may not have searched so hard to find another school.  Nor would I have even considered another school if we were still living in our first house. She’s had many awesome opportunities with her current school that she would have missed out on with the other two. I think it was worth the four month struggle we both faced after we moved.  But it’s taken me a long time to figure it out.

Whenever I think of the apostle Peter, I wonder if he had regrets.  He made some huge errors that are recorded for the entire world to read about.  And yet, how much stronger and diligent was he at fulfilling his mission?  Did he not turn his human weaknesses into strengths?  Was he not a stronger leader after the resurrection than before Christ was crucified?

There are no time machines.  We can’t change the past.  Regret will only get in the way of our growth and happiness.  We need to move on.  We need to find our strengths.

Reminiscing

Last year Ellen took my mom to the store to purchase three gifts.  I don't know whether Ellen suggested it or if mom had thought on her own to get her three youngest grandchildren one gift each.

When I saw them on the table I asked my mom about them.

"What are these?" I asked.

"I don't know.  I think they're Ellen's"

I didn't think they were.

I didn't see much of Ellen when I was at mom's house.  But somewhere we made a connection and I had asked if they really were hers.  She said that mom had purchased them for Jenna, Anna and Gary but she hadn't gotten around to wrapping them.

I wrapped them and tagged them and placed them under the tree.  My mom kept asking who the gifts were for and where they came from.  She didn't seem to even know that Christmas was coming up pretty soon.

She was like a kid on Christmas day.  Who knew it would be the last Christmas that we would spend in her house?  or that it would be her last Christmas on earth?

Many of us are missing her this Christmas.  Many of us our thinking about our last holiday season together.  I'm grateful for the happy memories that help us to make this season a little more pleasant.

I really do miss you Mom!

Opportunities and Being the First

As a youth, I remember participating in school programs each year.  When I was in forth grade I remember performing in various parts of the city – including the University of Utah.  I thought we must have been really awesome to be asked to sing there.  I didn’t realize that many other schools participated also. I remember learning songs for a variety of occasions.  And I remember dressing up for Halloween.

At the end of January and the start of February 2012 I posted just a bit on the evolution of Jenna’s education.  Jenna has never dressed up for Halloween except for when she was in preschool – and even then they weren’t allowed to call it “Halloween”.  It got passed off as “Make Believe Day”.  Her first school was year round and Grades K-6 just happened to be off each Halloween.

She had two and a half years of schooling before we had to move.  She completed two years of preschool and then we registered her for kindergarten. There had been a big push to sign up for after school programs.  Mothers who had children who were struggling academically or parents who weren’t home to receive their children right after school opted the program.  I had signed up Jenna because in order to be a part of the school choir it was mandatory to stay after hours.

I recall how excited she was that first day I picked her up.  She thanked me for allowing her to be in the choir.  She and her friend Chate Lin both sang “Feliz Navidad” quite enthusiastically.  She wasn’t even in dual immersion at the time. I was saddened that a music program was never performed.   I would have liked for Jenna to have that experience. 

There was a tremendous interest in the after school program – possibly too much.  I’m guessing 35 – 50% were kindergarteners. Choir had to be split into two separate groups: the kindergarteners and everybody else. I heard that the kindergarteners were not allowed to participate in the after school program the following year due to the huge amount of children who were still on the waiting list.

So move on to the second school which did offer programs – though I don’t know how often.  Songs seemed to focus on things they were learning.  I don’t imagine they would ever do a holiday theme as the children who attending were from diverse backgrounds.  A melting pot of races and religions – many who struggled to learn anything.

She started the first grade school she attends currently.  She’s now in the forth.  Two or three times a year the children perform songs to fit the theme of Christmas or patriotism.  Sometimes there is an extra program for those in dual immersion.  Jenna loves having art and music.  Those were my favorite activities also.

The first school she attended is back to the traditional calendar year.  I notice that they dressed up for Halloween this year.  I noticed that they dress up at the school where my niece teaches also.  All three schools just happen to be in the same district but in Jenna's current school they are not allowed to dress up for Halloween while attending classes.   

But Jenna has opportunities in this school that hadn’t come with the first two and I’m grateful for those things that she has been able to do that she wouldn’t have had the opportunity to do otherwise.  Take today for instance.  Currently she is on a field trip for Ski Utah.  My baby is learning how to ski!  No one else in the family has been on skis.  The closest to it is Randy with his snowboard – but he has not been on skis.  

 Jenna has been ecstatic – not only for the field trip itself but for being able to be the first one in the family to do so. And I am grateful for her enthusiasm.  I look forward to hearing her report when I pick her up – which actually won’t be that long from now.

 

There’s a Pink Monster Near My Parking Spot!

            Regardless of what else she may say, Jenna’s favorite season is winter.  Okay, she has admitted to not liking being cold.  But she’s got to admit that she LOVES the snow. Since she was little she has been magnetized to it.  Loves climbing snow drifts, making snow angels, throwing snow, eating icicles, drawing in the snow with icicles.  Jenna LOVES the snow!

           We lived only five minutes away from her first school.  But we left the house at least twenty minutes early to give her time to dawdle.  The return home ALWAYS took twice as long.  But especially when there was snow.  Not a lot has changed in six years – except the school and transportation.  The other day she hit every snowdrift between the school and bus stop – and may have done it yesterday as well, but she forgot she said that she’d be helping out after school, and so I didn’t even meet with her until an hour after school got out.

            Morning brings the same thing.  Today the driver of the red pick up patiently waited as Jenna played in the drift next to the spot where she wanted to park.

Gingerbread Traditions

           As I have mentioned in a few posts already, I grew up in a house across the street from George and Peggy Bird. Both are from American Fork.  Peggy grew up learning all of the domestic skills of saintly motherhood.  She cooked, she sewed, and she baked. She loved her boys.  She was a devoted mother.

           

            My mom was raised in San Francisco.  She did not grow up understanding canning and food storage or many of the skills that Peggy had acquired.  Mom did try her hand at baking, sewing, crocheting, and even canning.  She loved us.  She was a good mom.  But I think my brother Patrick and I both believed that Peggy was better at baking.  It seemed like she was always baking.  I remember almost every time I walked into the house, she was baking.  What I remember most is the molasses cookies.  Was there ever a time I had gone across the street when molasses cookies weren’t available?  Not when I was in elementary school anyway.

 

I also remember the many Christmases we spent with the Birds. We became part of their family and enjoyed their traditions.

            There was the annual Christmas pageant.  For the longest time I was Mary.  When other families were invited to join in the production I lost my glorified role.  I remember getting demoted to an angel with no speaking parts.   Humility was not my strong suit.

            One tradition that mom had adapted into our own household was the annual ornament that each of us received and would add to the tree.  And when we were grown and out on our own or starting our own families, we would take our ornaments with us.

            One tradition that we didn’t adapt (though Patrick and I would drop hints each year) was the annual gingerbread house that Peggy made from scratch (I now fully understand why mom didn’t seem as excited about what Patrick and I thought would be great.  And perhaps she did attempt it but it just wasn’t her forte)

            I don’t know how early in the month she made it.  I would imagine it was decorated on a Monday night.  Each of the boys would help decorate (as I recall) and it would become part of the decorations.  On New Years Eve the boys would hold their annual Gingerbread Smash.  I think Patrick must have gone to them all – and I’d gone to a few (I usually got sick just before the new year) and we would each have an opportunity for hacking away at the house and then devour it.  That was something special.

 

            Nowadays commercialism offers pre-made gingerbread kits.  The taste of the gingerbread isn’t near as wonderful as the rich taste of Peggy’s made-from-love.  But Roland purchases kits each year – first for the boys and now for Jenna.  And each year Roland builds the house and instructs the kids on how to assist and then allows them to finish decorating with wherever their imaginations lead.  Less than 24 hours later the house gets broken into.  A few pieces here and there – the house goes from slum to run down eye-sore.  He doesn’t believe in display.  Too bad.

 

            Fortunately I have taken pictures every year – even last year when the house started out looking like a HUD home. Crooked, run-down.  Each year we’ve used up all the frosting.  This year was just a little bit different.  Roland purchased a pre-made house that we didn't have to glue.  We also ended up with tons of frosting left.

            Jenna decided that she wanted a green roof.  Roland helped her to spread the icing.  Other than that she decorated the entire thing by herself.  She included a flower on one side and a vegetable garden behind the house.  I thought it ironic that she’d call them vegetables as two of them in real life are vegetables that she refuses to let near her mouth.  

            Jenna created a vine and gave it tomatoes.  Next to that are two carrots.  And then a corn stalk with a few ears.  Finally eggplant which I don’t think she’s ever tasted before.  I have.  Haven’t been impressed with the taste of it.

            On the other side is a Christmas tree.  A Christmas tree and a vegetable garden.  I suppose it’s possible.  Not in my part of the world.

            Roland took some cookies out of the pantry and told us to decorate them. 

We still have frosting left.  But many parts of the gingerbread house have been eaten - including some of the roof.

A Silent Christmas

I am so grateful to see this posted on YouTube as I was not able to read it all at our Relief Society yesterday.  Truth be known, I would rather read a book than a video.  The message is awesome:

Thank you Brittney for sharing!