You Can't Go Home Again

            As a child I remember hearing idioms such as "a penny for your thoughts", "too big for your breeches", and "you can't go home again".  What????  I thought adults were such morons.  First of all, I was always certain that my thoughts were worth more than just a penny.  "breeches" was a term we hadn't used and so I had no idea what that was.  And "you can't go home again"?  Of course, you can.  In my childish mind, I took the phrase literally.  If I went to a neighbor's house, for instance, I was expected to come home.  Even as a college student I knew that I'd be going home again.  It wasn't until many decades later that I finally figured it out.

            "Home" is not necessarily a residence and family.  The "home" referred to is the past.  It's not just time that has put the distance between us but the evolutions and economical rise and fall that have contributed to a sense of loss as well.  I think this should be a topic for my brother's blog, but as he has not posted to his blog for over two years, I guess I will attempt to write about it on my own.

            He has posted many pictures to facebook.  Mostly memorabilia from 1960's and 1970's.  Even those two decades seemed to have differences in neighborhood and community.  Our Midvale neighborhood was fairly new.  I don't know how many houses existed on the entire street, but I think at least 30 at the top half of the street where we lived.  I remember many pregnant mothers, and all stay-at-home at that.  I knew of only one mother who worked outside of the home.  Other than that each of us seemed to be raised by all of the mothers on our street as there were many children, activities and spending time with one another.

            We all went to the same neighboring newly built elementary school.  Doors were left unlocked on all sides of the school and not just the front door.  School shootings were unheard of.  We didn't have school lockdowns. I think more field trips had been offered in the '60's  than were offered in the 70's when Corey and Kayla attended. But I could be wrong. 

            The Salt Lake Tribune offered pages to announce births and weddings.  We had a black and white TV which offered three stations: NBC, abc, and CBS.  We would drive up to Grandma's house at least once a week.  At that time her house was located behind the capital building.  My brother and I would always have great adventures there with my cousins.  We would explore the house inside and out.  

            Many years after my grandpa had passed and my aunt moved out on her own, the family talked grandma into moving.  It really was a huge house for one person to take care of.  I think even more work was required for the upkeep of the yard.  She did not move until after Corey was born, but he will never have the same memories that I did of that house on Edgecomb Dr. It's really too bad.  I was told that Grandma had contributed to the design of the house.

            I think our visits to Grandma were made more frequently when she moved to Murray.  I was thrilled to learn I could ride my bike there - not that I did it often.  Usually, we went by car, but I can remember taking the bus a few times also.  It was the condominium in Murray that Corey and Kayla might think of as "Grandma's house".  After she passed the condominium was sold.  It's still a sensitive subject for a few family members.

            Spending time with all of my neighbors was part of my childhood.  I remember going to others' houses and they would come to ours.  Our neighbors, the Birds, would take us to American Fork with them in July for the Steel Days parade and activities.  Although it's been several decades since I have been, I am happy to see that this is still a community event - (here) 

            Jenna has grown up in a society of many working mothers and hasn't always had the option of spending time with neighbors the way that I did.  We don't just drop by on people the way we did then.  Play dates need to be scheduled.  Appointments need to be made. 

            The school she attends in Myrtle Creek is quite different from the ones she'd attend in Salt Lake.  Still, there are lock downs and precautions that didn't seem necessary when I was growing up.  Oh, I'm not saying that wicked things didn't take place during the 60's and 70's, but nothing like they are now.  Corey and I have had a hard time letting go of the house where we were raised.  I saw a picture on facebook recently of two police cars parked in front of a house in my old neighborhood.  The caption warned others that the resident had been recently burglarized.  I'm sorry to read about the intrusion, but it does make it easier for me to deal with losing the house.  There are many members of the neighborhood that I know and still have contact with, but even more that I do not.

            So while many things (both tangible and not) have been lost, others have been gained.  I, for one, am grateful that technology has made the vacuum easier to lift along with other appliances.  Retrieving some items from closet or cupboard seemed to be a chore in itself - but then having to use them to complete the chore . . . well, I am happy I don't have to do the same heavy lifting as my mom or her mom before her.  I am grateful for having so information at my fingertips - literally, but horrified about it at the same time.  Research seems to be so much easier with sites such as Google, but often it seems there is more personal information offered that it seems like an invasion of privacy.  For instance, I don't know the exact location of Roland's two oldest daughters, but perhaps enough that I could track them down if I had the finances or desire to do so.

            They have moved around so often I don't know that they even have a sense of home.  I wonder if they even have any memories of where they'd been and who they've met.  I don't suppose it's easy to "go home again" if you've never had one.

           For more idioms, you can click here for meaning.  Unfortunately, this site does not provide the origin.  Some are self-explanatory.  You are encouraged to look up origins on your own.

Historic Eagles Lodge: Eagles' to Equitable to Bay to Historic Landmark?

          The first location of Salt Lake's Equitable Life and Casualty was housed in the old Eagle's lodge building on 4th South and West Temple. According to this website Roderick Ross had established the company in said location in 1948.  The building itself did not seem the ideal for the insurance business - at least not with the Eagle's Lodge floor plan. Perhaps in the late 1940's it didn't matter that the building contained skinny stairs and a balcony, but it seemed quite inappropriate in the 1980s.

          My dad had been hired as a computer programmer.  I think he used a different entrance to the building than the majority of workers.  On occasion I had opportunity to visit him at his place of work. As a child I remember seeing parts of what I believed to be the basement.  My dad worked with one those huge wall-to-wall computers  (or maybe several) that may have well taken up the majority of the basement.  It is the break room that I remember most.  I remember tables were set up and at least two different vending machines.  One was quite tiny and offered tiny bottled drinks that cost a dime.  Another machine offered cigarettes.  I don't remember seeing any other part of the building until I was employed there myself.

          Good grief! What a mess! I remember the file cabinets were located on the balcony.  The layout of the office space had not been planned.  File cabinets were added and continued to crowd the already closeted feeling workspace.  I remember looking out over the floor below the balcony thinking how everything seemed disarray and congested.   

The building itself may have been a prime location when it housed the Eagles or even when the Insurance Company took over. However, the neighborhood  itself had seemed to go downhill - even with the Sheraton Hotel owning property just beyond the building on the corner. 

          There was a building sandwiched between the Equitable building and the Sheraton parking lot.  I don't know if it had a name.  Most people unfondly called it "Bum Motel" as there were many residents that seemed to lack ethics and made a habit of getting drunk.  I recall dad coming home from work one time to report that a drunk had fallen out of the window and landed on somebody's car.  The drunk was so intoxicated, he was able to walk away.  The car was severely damaged. I was told that Ross' had tried to buy them out and had speculated that Sheraton had tried to buy out the owner as well, but the owner wouldn't budge.

          I had not worked at said location for long.  The company moved to a much nicer building, nicer location and much bigger parking lot.  The building that had once housed the Eagles and then Equitable was eventually purchased by a company that turned it into a dance hall of sorts.  It was called "The Bay".  I remember having gone there just one time.  It appeared that the structure must have been gutted out an rebuilt. As I recall the interior did not remotely resemble the building I had been familiar with several years before.

          The outside still looks the same.  I don't know if  it is currently occupied or not.  This site says it is a historical landmark. I found this picture on google map

From the outside, the building looks the same as it did in 1948.  The picture I had used in this post didn't appear to have ownership either but contains advertisement to put your name here.  I don't know if it was advertized on the building itself or just the photo that I used.  The Google picture doesn't have a name on the building.  I have noticed at least two other vacant buildings during my search.

          I also learned that 400 South is now called University Boulevard - which I guess could have been its name for the last twenty years.  I didn't realize it had been given that name until I started doing research for my assignment. It was probably named so after UTA started using the trains.  The building seems like it would be a good location as it is  next to TRAX (Utah's extended public transportation) but still may not be the greatest part of town.  I don't know this for sure. I'm not there anymore. 

Remincing the Work Places of my Past

          Assignments for accounting classes are always done in Excel.  I don't have to worry about referencing or APA format, which (as I mentioned before) appears to be more important to the instructor than the content itself.  It does not help any when instructors tell us to refer to the owl  Perdue here which for me personally is neither helpful nor received well on my part.  I, fortunately, have had an instructor, the dean of English at that, who didn't seem to be a big fan of Owl Purdue herself and sent us tutorial videos, which I think are much easier to understand.

I have had to create assignments in APA form for all my non-accounting classes.  Most classes will give a topic such as

         "name some types of real estate and give some examples" or

          " Using the website above or another website of your choosing, identify at least one of the fallacies that you are most likely to commit. Describe a specific time when you committed this particular fallacy. What could you do to avoid committing this fallacy in the future?"  

giving us the option to explore and draw from many sources. I have also had classes that are more specific to the topic such as:

          "Gary Kelly CEO of Southwest Airlines" or "Panera Bread" (I have heard that Panera has been since changed to another topic) and sometimes there is the option of choosing from topics.  I think I have touched on all of these subjects in my blog during the time I have written for class.  

 

          In the past, my classes have pushed at least 500 words, but this class has to have at least 750 which has been a challenge every week but the first. This final week's prompt states:  

          "You are the Operations Manager for a technology company. Your company is looking to expand its product line and in doing so it will need a larger or even second location. What considerations are taken into account for determining which solution is best? When you decide the solution how do you secure the property? Would any other item needed to expand the product line be considered real property?"  Huh?

            Okay, first off, the scenario is one I cannot completely identify with nor will this ever be a situation I will be putting myself in.  However, as an accountant, I suppose I could contribute suggestions - though currently, I think it's more from personal experience as an employee who has worked for companies that have had to relocate for various reasons.  The perks from an employee's perspective were the parking lot and more elbow room.  During the first year that my blog was in production, I had briefly mentioned three different places of employment that had dealt with relocating their business.  As I was unable to include all my triggered thoughts into my assignment, I will rehash some old posts with some new detail.  Stay tuned (or not) as I'll need to sort my thoughts.

Same Lesson, Two Different Methods for Teaching

          As mentioned in prior posts, the beginning of the year started out with a huge attendance of children in the Valiant class.  The average was from 12 to 16 students.  It seems like we were introducing ourselves every week as not everyone was acquainted with those who were either visiting or those who had recently come  back to church.

          Danny would generally give the lesson and I would be there to discipline.  When Danny wasn't there to teach, I would teach and ask someone else to sit in with me.  Often I would ask Roland, but when I did the lesson on creation this year, it was Danny's mom that sat in the class with me.

          I introduced the class to Sugardoodle's Passports by Melanie Day (found here) -  as I am currently unable to open the Sugardoodle sight, I am hopefully giving credit to the correct person.  I did not know how well this would appeal to the older children but knew that it might to the younger ones.  I used this knowing that we might separate and I would be teaching the five youngest Valiants

          Those willing to read took turns reading scriptures that explained the details of the creation found in Genesis 1, Moses 2 and Abraham 4 and 5.  I had each of the children fill out a journal page separated into four parts

          One was filling hers out so diligently that she ran out of space and I told her she could use the back.  Danny's mom had contributed a lot of thought and meaning into my lesson as well.  I thought it went well.  Better than the following week when I tried my hand at explaining the Garden of Eden and Fall with Jenna blocks as illustrated in this post. 

     

          I had set displays up on a table surrounded by 16 chairs. Jenna helped me with the Jenga and the chairs. I sent her to her own class but may have been better off keeping her. My good intentions contributed what I felt had been a disaster!  This has nothing to do with Darcee Pergler (the creator of the game) but rather my own lack of control and discipline over my students.

          I think I had 14 children in my class that day no other adult.  They all wanted to touch the Jenga pieces and either rebuilt the tower or continue playing.  I kept on asking different children to move to the vacant chair as Carly couldn't seem to keep her hands off of Casey.  Shannon will talk to Anne or Helen.  Thomas acts up no matter what.  I was not pleased with the results of their focus . . . the blocks themselves and the lesson subject hadn't mattered. 

          Carly decided that perhaps we could play a different game.  How about musical chairs?  Weren't we already sort of doing that?  I wasn't going to reward their ill behavior with games of any sort . .  let alone ones that had absolutely nothing to do with the gospel.  And I told them so.  I pushed the table out of their reach and told them that they needed to focus on the lesson please.  What was our purpose for being in primary?

https://www.becker.uk.com/

          Last week I divided the rooms. I set up a small table with 5 chairs in a circle and Danny's brother set up her room.  I had planned on introducing my class to the ribbon idea that was used in my seminary bowl days.  (see this post)

          I had looked for ribbon while we were at Big Lots in Roseburg, though I did not find what I was looking for .  I found instead a garland made from heart links

and thought it might be fun to use those with message scripture instead      - the first appropriately "A broken heart and a contrite spirit  . . ." as I had to break each heart in order to each on separately.

I had also decided to return to the passport lessons as it seemed to be more effective with the younger children who I would be teaching.  I also had created (based on others' ideas) a picture-ized Article of Faith page for us to memorize.

          Just before Sacrament meeting started, I was told that Danny would not make it to church however, and so I taught both groups.  It wasn't as big deal as there were only seven students.  And though I had enough material for the scriptures and article of faith for each student, I went a different direction and again related the account of why we have the Pearl of Great Price and why it is important part of scripture.

          My class was reverent while I was teaching, but once we got into sharing time/singing time, the volume and disrespect had gone up greatly.  Emily (who is in CTRs) sat in front of me.  She fiddled with her necklace.  Whoever was presenting sharing time asked her several times if she would put it under her chair.  She'd pretend to, but then she would start playing with it again.  I tapped her on the shoulder and asked if she would like to come sit with me.  Surprisingly, she not only said yes, but seemed excited about it.  She put everything on the floor under her chair without my having to tell her.

          Yesterday was the first day that Danny and I taught the kids separately.  I had three that attended my class and I think she said she ended up with only six.  I used the passport and gave them hearts and ribbons to wear and I introduced them to Enoch and some vocabulary words and then we attempted to memorize the 10th article of faith.

          Danny said she just reviewed. She still doesn't feel well.  I don't think 6 kids in that room may have given the same sensation of being claustrophobic as I believe 10 to 12 kids will.  I don't know if this separate class thing will last the duration of the year.  But I think I am having more success with Thomas being part of a smaller class.  I think that perhaps the younger ones may not feel so lost in the shuffle and hopefully will better learns.

         During Singing Time, Emily asked if she could sit with me.

I Think I'll Take a Snow Day

        We were told that snow in this part of Oregon is really rare, and yet we've seen it every year since we've been here.  Oh, nothing like Salt Lake, mind you.  It is only one or two days - and usually just on the trees and hills,  not on the roads.  Currently, it is on the road.

        The schools called to say that all schools in the district are closed.  They were supposed to take a field trip today.  Hopefully, it will get rescheduled.

        I actually have more ambition today than I did yesterday - or all week rather.  Not wanting to study.  Not wanting to post.  No desire.  No emotions.  And now I think I could.  And Jenna's home.  I would rather spend time with her.

        Yesterday I wrote this pathetic poem.  It sounds much better if you imagine a harmonica and sung in a blues style.  I wasn't really feeling blue, just blah.  It's been quite bizarre, actually.  But it has passed.  I'm feeling more lively now.  Perhaps not lively enough to go out and enjoy the snow like Jenna does.  I measured two inches of snowfall.

          I have no ambition

I'm in a funk

          I need some motivation

Or my grades are sunk

          I'm singing imaginary blues

Though I'm really not depressed

          I don't have any emotions

Don't feel happy, sad or stressed

          I need to snap out of

This unfeeling stage

          Replay to two discussions

And write another page

          Focus on my schooling and

Take a test, no two

          Aside from education

There is still so much to do

          I used to make up songs and poems

When I've been in funks before

          Often it worked out for me

But doesn't anymore.

          Still no ambition or even allowing

My mind to roam

          Still in a funk and

With a stupid poem.

         Jenna's had a cough for a couple of weeks now.  Would be nice if she could shake it off.

When Dreams Get Retired

          Roland has always wanted to have his own business. ALWAYS.  And I have made it absolutely no secret that business DOESN'T interest me.  We are both taking business courses, although my current classes are neither as tough or as boring or need to go into as much detail as his did.

          It seems the entire time we've lived here, his business plan has always had to do with senior daycare - a service that is desperately needed in our area.  He has done some amazing research.  He has felt excitement and he has felt defeat.

          There were six weeks where he had changed his plan from doing senior daycare to selling ice cream and if we opened under our own name (rather than a franchise) we would call it the Happy Hurricane. The idea of selling ice cream did not last for long as he was unable to get past the first hurdle of finding an ideal location for a finicky public.  Okay by me.  I really don't wish to deal with food - though we'd still have to deal with food in an adult day care setting, that would not be our primary focus of the business.

          Through research, Roland has learned that over 65% of all of those who live in Douglas County are over 65 years old. There are many who have moved back with their elderly parents or who have brought their elderly parents to live with them. Though there are some who have expressed excitement to the idea of adult day care, the majority of this community would have to be educated in what an adult daycare even is.

          Roland would like to build a corporation.  I just roll my eyes.  I don't even want to work for a corporation.  He has spent a ton of hours into research and had even sent letters out to use as a backup for starting a business.  I don't think anyone took the time to fill out the questionnaire - which I do understand.  It was quite lengthy.  Opening an adult day care does not seem promising financially.  Oh well. His passion is with graphic art and marketing. 

           My current assignment is on partnerships.  Though he would like to be able to expand the business, it is now in a fizzled out stage.  I have used his creation (but not his business plan itself) as an example to explain partnership - though he was hoping for something more.  I am so unmotivated this week and still have to turn in two assignments and take two assessments. I'm definitely not focused right now.  

Magic Hands

        I remember someone posting this cartoon to facebook. 

I laughed as I read it as I relate, both to having been the child and now the mother.  But it isn't just a relationship with mothers and children when this sort of magic happens.  It happens among husbands and wives as well - at least in our family.

        I remember many times mom would used to say to dad, "There is something wrong with the car"  and so he would take the problematic car to work and of course it would ride smoothly for him and give absolutely no indication of ever having any kind of behavior problem.  It seemed that way with all appliances - and it wasn't because my dad was mechanical minded.  I think electronics and mechanics just have a way of playing pranks on the female mind.

        Take my computer for instance - the pop-ups, the constant threats,

of course my computer is well behaved whenever Roland sits down to it.  After a month (or more) of not being able to pull up Yahoo on my PC, it appears just fine for him.  I didn't even need to give him the latest password that I had changed it too.  What????

        I am so not motivated to do any class work right now.  Frustrated that my husband and dad seem to have magic hands - unbeknownst to them.  I want magic hands!!!