Appropriate for the Way I Feel

Can't you feel this going on in your own life right now?

One Last Hoorah – at least until the Curse lifts

        I believe it was February 10 I had taken a personal day to be with my group of friends that I’ve been hanging out with for the last two or three years after the pool and once a month when the pool is closed.  We enjoy going to Soco and visiting outdoors but when it has gotten colder, we have gone to Good Dogs.  Our meetings have usually gone for less than two hours, but on the 10^th we were there for over three.

        Sue got in trouble – first with the owner as she had parked her car in front and it should be reserved for other customers.  Apparently her husband was not all that thrilled she had been gone so long.  They put me in charge of this month.  We were supposed to meet at lunch at a nearby place which offers Mexican food.  I thought this week would be good as I would be off during spring break.  We had no clue than that spring break would turn out not to be much of a break afterall (or perhaps too much of a break - depending on how it is viewed).

        Caroline really wished for the four of us to get together this month and had suggested a picnic at Millsite.  I was the only one willing and able as the other two are now housebound – and I think after today, we are too – which has been really hard for Jenna.  Facing the reality that her “sweet sixteen” will not be even close to what she had planned.  I know of at least one person who didn’t feel his plans were disrupted and is enjoying the opportunity of solitude – something that Jenna just doesn’t relate to.

        So Jenna and I met Caroline at an order-to-go where Caroline purchased a fish sandwich.  Jenna saw a friend in line and gave her a hug.  I joked that that was not socially acceptable and they resorted to elbow bumps.  Caroline was freaked at the amount of people and how closely they were standing to one another.  Jaime and I were scolded and kept our distance as Caroline waited for her sandwich. She had already made it clear that we would not be going in the same car and asked me to follow her. 

        There was tranquility to a degree as we sat at a table and ate our sandwiches and then Caroline showed us around and took us to the river – which by the way was gorgeous.  Except for the sounds of the occasional cars driving by, I felt secluded from the rest of the world.  It was an awesome place to be. 

Jenna took all of the photos; this one is of
a labyrinth.  Unfortunately could not capture all

We did not play checkers or even had any games.  It
may not have gone over well for Caroline to touch
game pieces that had not been sanitized each round

        After returning home, I have decided that perhaps we should not venture out of the house anymore until things return to normal - will there be a normal?  We have enough food and water supply to last several months should it come to that.  Right now our governor seems optimistic that schools will be opening April 28^th.  Meanwhile California and Washington have reported no more school for this school year.  I can’t imagine that things will be brighter for us in 5 weeks and not the rest of the west coast – or country – or world.

        I think this year is the most I have ever looked forward to general conference. April 4th and 5th.  Tune in.  Even if you are not of the LDS faith but are having issues with the pandemic - the broadcast will help calm you.  You'll see.

Avatars and Peculiar People

          Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints have always been referred to as “a strange and peculiar people”. Perhaps one reason is because many members will spend time getting high on life instead of drugs.  We march to the beat of a different drummer in many minds – and while there are many who may find us odd, there are just as many who may admire us because of our values and being able to face challenges with a different perspective.

          I remember both Corey and Joh were present when my youngest son got married.  As they waited for us on the outside and walked around temple square (I guess) Joh had many questions and would ask Corey – who by then had not been a member on record due to his excommunication (see here) 

It was then that Corey understood why members are often called “a strange and peculiar people”.

          I remember one time one of my brothers (Patrick, I think) either purchased or had received a CD featuring Huey Lewis and we listened to it and all of us danced to each song.  We were in their living room and the curtains were drawn away from the window.  I wondered how odd we may have appeared to any passerby.  It didn’t matter.  We were having fun.  I cherish the memory of us as we really enjoyed ourselves. I am reminded of this memory each time Jenna and I “work out” and our front door is open.

Jenna has decided that we must exercise each day.  Her workout choice is to dance.  She will play videos on YouTube and we will follow the dance moves – or attempt to.  Mostly she has been pulling up “Just Dance” videos with Wii avatars, but occasionally we will try to work out or Sumba with real live people who are always in sync even though we’re not.  Especially me. I don't know if anyone has seen us through the door.

         

          The other night we asked Roland to join us.  He joined us for one song.  Jenna selected “Living La Viva Loco” as she really appreciates the single avatar who dances on a flatbed it appears to be moving through the dessert.  Roland mostly just did the arm movements, but occasionally I could see that he may have been working his legs – although we were all looking at the screen more than one another.

         

          After I got up yesterday, I went over my normal routine of checking email, checking facebook, downloading the dailys on my kindle and then attempted to make breakfast.  Jenna, who normally has left her room by 5:00 was still in her room when I started breakfast.  Three poached eggs, three slices of ham, two English mufflins (as our toaster will only do four slices) and whatever cheese was left in the container.  I made two sandwiches pretty similar to the McMuffin and Roland and I ate.  When he returned to his office to work, I asked Jenna if she would like me to fix her some breakfast.

          I put another muffin in the toaster and she unloaded the dishwasher while I made her sandwich.  We asked a blessing on our food and began our day with prayer and watched “Come Follow Me” which covered Enos, Jarom, Omni and Words of Mormon.  And then we danced. We finished watching the 2^nd Jumanji and each did our own thing.  I  attempted to crochet some dishcloths and played several puzzles on my kndle.  I think Jenna watched more videos and made some tiktoks.  Silly girl.  

Why is this orange shaped like a pear
and why does my hand appear to be twice
the size of my head?

Jenna had asked me to send the above photo to my brother-in-law as the face I am making reminds her of the ones he makes.  He is a professional photographer and may cringe at the result of pic

Documenting Day 7.  Jenna's bored.

          Once Roland got off work, we headed up to the big city of Roseburg and went about our regular activities.– like those who had brought this virus outbreak upon us had finally finished the Jumanji game and things felt normal.  The traffic flow felt normal.  The recycling plant was open – not overly crowded with people – but well more than ten standing closer together than you think the “accepted social distance” would allow.  No one wore masks, though there were a few patrons who wore gloves.  The majority of the hands that I saw were naked  After turning in our bottles and cans, we headed to Stewart Park to feed the ducks.  

And since we were already there, we went into Fred Meyers to pick up some milk and cheese. 

          There weren’t any monitored lines as we had witnessed the last time we had attempted to go to Costco.  

There were many shoppers – no panic- no distance.  The only thing that had changed was the number of unhoused people standing between the park and store parking lot holding signs, begging for financial aid.  I saw only one shoeless woman standing holding a sign.  It said “God Bless” and she had drawn a red heart.  Near her was a cart full of cloth bags – I don’t know if they contained all her possessions.

          We had heard her singing, and when Roland returned to the store to purchase a forgotten item, Jenna and I took the rest of the groceries to the car.  While we waited for Roland, Jenna approached the sign holder and asked her if they might sing a duet together.  Jenna made another Tik Tok of the two of them singing “This is Me”.  I thought it was great!

          Traffic wasn’t outrageously heavy going back to Tri-City, but there were a good amount of cars.  Enough to make it feel as though nothing about the week had changed and changed and then changed again.  But after we returned, Roland had turned on the TV.  The newscasters had taken us to Italy where the virus has gotten out of hand.  And I wondered how many of my followers who live in Italy would comment about how careless I have been.  Or if they would agree with my wrecklessness. 

          It’s said that the rural areas will be hit hard eventually.  Rural hospitals may not be prepared to handle the outbreak.  I believe that only because of the reputation that many will say are unable to deal with what was thrown at them before COVID-19.  There is one hospital in our county which I mentioned is geographically the same size as Rhode Island.  Douglas county has just over 109,000 persons occupying space whereas Rhode Isand houses over a million residents.

          I’m not scared.  I refuse to live in fear.  I do wonder what other restrictions lye ahead.  I predict that soon we will be grounded to our houses and will be breaking the law if we drive our cars.  Almost matches the description of the restrictions put on citizens during World War II.

         

The First Day of Spring

          There were several signs of spring before it the equinox made (or will make) it official.  So many trees in pink and white blossom and all the daffodils and allergies.  

Though my eyes appreciate the view from a distance, I have a hard time with spring up close as my sinuses go ballistic.  My ears tear and my nose runs.  Allergies.  I’m not sick.  I’m annoyed.  I need more moisture than the air has been providing me with lately.  Time to bring out the humidifier – which always seemed like an oddity for this part of Oregon.  But with Roland always being cold at night, the electric heat is really not agreeing with me right now.  

          It’s the heat.  It’s not a virus.  I’m not sick.  Even if I do get sick, I won’t admit it.  I’m not going to the doctor’s or hospital.  There are sick people there.  They don’t allow visitation.  I’m not going to spend my isolation in a hospital where I’m really not isolated as there will be other patients and staff in masks.  Not me.  I’m staying home.  Even if I do get sick or break a body part or puncture myself.  I will weigh it out at home with my loved ones around me.  I am NOT going to go to the hospital.

          Parent Teacher Conference was supposed to be held tomorrow and Spring break officially starts on Monday.  This morning Jenna and I did her last seminary assignment for this week.  Seminary won’t start back up until March 30.  They will try meet two days a week online but the students are on their own for the remaining three. Jenna still wants us to study each morning whether there’s seminary or not.  We are cruising through the Book of Mormon and the Come Follow Me Program.  

We are ahead of where we would be if we were meeting on Sundays for Sunday School.  Looking forward to General Conference.  We were told it would be unlike any other.  We didn’t know why then, but many have figured out why now. 

Laughter Really is the Best Medicine

       Jenna changed her tune a bit from Monday.  I woke up yesterday to find her dressed in green – well, partial green anyway.  She didn’t go overboard as she did the week prior when she dressed in yellow for spirit week.  She said she will be wearing the same thing for her birthday – her “sweet sixteen” and like everybody else’s plans will be very different from what she had planned.

          We started the series "100 Humans" and were amused by many of #23's responses, namely his 600 plus word explanation on how to play Tic Tac Toe - laughter.  It was/is greatly needed.

          We had played games the last couple of days.  Sequence on Monday and Spades last night.  We have both danced to music – even commercial jingles.  How much better our day has been when we can smile and laugh.  She had wanted to go to the park to hand out gold coins, but it has been really cold outside ever since the schools have closed. 

          This morning I found a facebook message from my sister sharing a new concern for the Salt Lake area.  In addition to the precautions for covid-19 they are facing a new challenge – that is an earthquake of a 5.7 magnitude which caused Moroni to lose his horn.  Wow!!!  

Yes, it is devastating.  Seems symbolic in a way. But at the same time, can you see the humor?  You have to laugh.  You have to give yourself the opportunity to laugh or else you will go stir crazy.

          Earthquake plus:  no children were affected by the damage to the schools as they were already home.  See here.

Welcome to the Hotel California

I often feel like I am an extra or cast member in one of those poorly made science fiction movies in which the government has ordered everyone into isolation.  I feel bad about those who have to go to the hospital as it feels like they will never return.  The only thing missing from this sf weirdness is the standard silver jumpsuit that seems to be the attire of the entire planet – though we never see the entire planet.  Nor do we really know for certain if the jumpsuit truly is silver as it is a black and white movie.

 We’re grounded to our houses for our own protection while a selected few get to be out in the public eye for “our protection” – and they end up being eaten by the monsters or disintegrated or whatever.  And those few who are left in their homes have absolutely no clue what is going on.

        There are truths and there are rumors, precautions and scare tactics, internet jokes and so forth.  After a while people are uncertain as what to believe.

        My phone seemed to be ringing off the hook on Thursday – lots of text messaging.  No hook, really.  That was just a figure of speech.

        We had had an activity planned for Saturday.  RS birthday party (which is today, by the way) and luncheon.  Should we cancel?  Should we continue?  Pray.  The activity was cancelled two hours before we received word from church headquarters to cancel all meetings.  ALL meetings.

        It generally takes the world a lot longer to catch up with what the prophets have already revealed.  But the schools announced that Friday would be the last day for a couple of weeks.  It is going to be more than two weeks.  Kids may not return to school until September when they are supposed to start a new year.

        I dialed several numbers after I returned home.  I left many messages and did not talk to anyone directly until about the fifth call.  I understand why the average person would not pick up the phone as my area code shows up differently than the one in Douglas County – but most of the people that I called have me in their system.  Only I felt like all phone communication was in an apocalypse. There was the start of that eerie science fiction.

        My nephew’s baptism was originally scheduled for the 14^th.  I thought that odd as my granddaughter’s was the week prior.  And then his was changed – at the last minute it sounds.  What a blessing that was as they were still holding meetings on the 7^th and having more than 25 in attendance was permitted.

        Yes.  We were told more than 200.  No more than 250 (it changed, conflicting messages – which was true?  Which is true now) and yesterday the governor of Oregon said no more than 25.  Actually 24.  Within 30 minutes we had heard 10 in some places.  Are you kidding me?

        I am so looking forward to general conference on the 4^th and 5^th.

To Sink or Not to Sink

Friends of Myrtle Creek Library have been polled on whether to keep the library open or close it along with the schools and other government businesses that have shut.  Our library is NOT government.  We’re run on volunteers.  Some agree that we should shut.  I don’t know if they are panicked or really seeking precaution – which is probably how we should lean, but some of us are already bored with the feeling of recluse.  There are many individuals who don’t have access to current events other than through the library.  There are still children who like to read books and there are things to learn during their time absent from school.

  

          The gal who does the scheduling has worn herself out.  It would be okay to shut down.  We have a choice.  Patrons have the choice whether to come.  Patrons have the choice of whether to shop or go out and eat.  Unfortunately, many workers do not.  Not if they want to keep their jobs.  Not all businesses are controlled by the government.  Not all businesses take precaution.  Some businesses run like the Titanic.

Topical Press Agency / Stringer / Getty Images,
Wikimedia Commons see here - interesting theories

"Want to know how it feels to be a retail worker during the Coronavirus spread?  Remember when the Titanic was sinking and the band continued to play?" - facebook post

Beginning of Isolation

This morning my alarm went off as I had set a reminder to meet with the bishop this morning.  Of course that never happened.  It is weird not going to church on Sunday.  The dismal air outside mirrors the way Jenna and I feel with summoned isolation.

Jenna and I watched a “Come Follow Me” video before reading Jacob in its entirety.  

She still plans to study independently according to her daily schedule starting with seminary and each class that she has – except for maybe one of her math classes as she has no reference from the school.  I told her to watch math videos during that time.

I did get a message from the friends of Myrtle Creek library.  They may be staying open as they are not considered to be a public library.  However, the library is still in a city-owned building and so the decision may not solely be left for patrons and volunteers of the library to decide.

This is such an odd reality – or is it?  Are we just guinea pigs in some political scam in which the media blows everything out of proportion?  I’m not worried.  I’ve got more pressing things going on in my life.  Worry is not one of them.  Que Sera Sera.

Odd Week – or at least the last half . . .

            I accepted a long term position at the middle school last week.  When I arrived to the school on Monday I was given a schedule which had my name on it along side three other aides.  I was told to follow the schedule unless another aide is absent and than her schedule would be my priority rather than my own.  I’ve been there enough times to know what teachers utilize me and which ones don’t and so will use my own discretion on where I may be needed most but often will feel as useful as a tampon dispenser in a men’s room.

            The schools let out an hour earlier on Wednesdays giving time for instructors to meet together or what have you.  Those aides who are scheduled to stay after school lets out go to the detention room to provide homework support for those students who need it.  As I have mentioned in prior posts I have RS meetings on Wednesdays – or did rather. I am able to leave before school lets out in order to make my meeting.  As a result, the office manager had me come in earlier.

            I arrived before the students were dismissed from the Cafeteria to walk up hill and cross the street to the school.  When I arrived, students were walking toward the Skyhawk instead of going to the school.  I hadn’t believed that there was enough time to make the walk down there but learned that all students were being sent there as there was “a flood in the girls’ bathroom” which I guess was code for something else – though I don’t know what.  When I had seen the police officer I wondered if it was vandalism.  I don’t have my own email account for the school and so did not get all of the details about what took place.

            Many teachers stood in the cafeteria as students sat at tables or on the floor.  One teacher was on the stage lecturing the youth about the seriousness of the cornavirus and went over hygiene and the importance of washing our hands.  After about 35-40 minutes, the students were released to go to the school.   First period was pretty shot as far as time goes.  The staff added an additional ten minutes cutting the next class 10 minutes short, but 3-7 period were all the 35 minutes that occur each Wednesday.

            On Thursday a child had pulled the fire alarm just before the middle schoolers were about to dismissed for lunch.  The fire department was contacted and those persons who’d been in the elementary school and surrounding buildings could not be in the building.  Because the Skyhawk cafeteria is near the elementary school, it was closed due to a “fire drill” – thus all the students were to report to the gym before they could go to lunch.  I don’t know how long they were there.  Though the inconvenience seemed to disrupt the schedule, they made it work.  Still it felt weird.

I made this rough map to illustrate my
explanation in a letter to my son.

            This morning it was announced that today will be our last day for a while.  The state of Oregon is shutting down all schools for at least the next two weeks.  Two weeks, really?  They think all this commotion will be gone by then?  I expect it will be more than a month.  But what do I know?  

            At lunch time a few patrol cars showed up and the officers entered the field to play football with the students.  That was an awesome sight!  

             I read on my sister’s facebook page that they have shut down the libraries in Utah.  I don’t know whether they have been pulled out of school or not.  I really haven’t seen a lot of signs of panic.  I have seen more eye-rollers and skepticism.  Signs of precaution and concern. Jenna brought home a letter about the school shut-down and Roland said we need to keep it for the future of “remember this”. 

            My paycheck is usually enough to pay the mortgage – though sometimes it has been under.  I think this is one of those times that it will be way under.  Jenna’s crying.  Not only did seminary get cancelled but so did school.  Her birthday is coming up.  Some sweet sixteen celebration.  Isolation. Again, worse things happening elsewhere.  My suggestions to her are not helpful at the moment.   

Be Prepared . . . Perhaps

When the “Come Follow Me” program was introduced at the same time as two hour meetings, we were told to use the third hour to study at home.  We were also told that we wanted to develop the habit for one day when we were unable to attend church meetings for whatever reason.  None of us had predicted this soon however.

We had cancelled our last RS activity due to the weather and decided to cancel our upcoming as well.  We had made the decision before the church announced NO MORE MEETINGS until further notice (here). Only seminary will be held unless the schools shut.  But as of now only seminary is the only meeting that will be held at the ward house.  No others.  Not even sacrament meeting. 

Why do people panic instead of remaining calm?  Why do so many always expect the worse.  Instead of viewing the police car at the high school as “Oh, good.  They are keeping my child safe” a parent may panic and demand, “What is going on?” or a fire truck at the elementary . . . of course Roland is looking at this with a business mind and political gain.  I seriously doubt the church is in it for either of those.  And it always takes much longer for the world to catch up to what God has warned us about all along.

Some are eye rollers and don’t understand the severity – or don’t want to.  Closing our eyes to what’s happening won’t make it go away.  When a sporting event is cancelled, then I know that it’s serious.  They haven’t cancelled the schools as of yet, but have limited to school only – no parent teacher conferences, no assemblies, no athletic or performing art events.  Today the air raids have been going off all day. 

We have “bug out” bags located next to our door.  Over the years we have added, borrowed and changed items but have never had to use for intended purpose.  Even now.  We won’t be “bugging out”, we will be staying in.  Hopefully with the benefits of electrical communication and running water.  We won’t stay marooned.  Jenna and I will go to the park or elsewhere if school is cancelled.  Hang out in the fresh air.  It will still be fresh air? 

I came to Oregon, not just to add years to my life, but decades.  I intend to claim them. 

Chilly

The morning fog was thick

In years past that meant

when the skies decided to clear

 that it would be sunny

and warm

then to hot

Not today.

The fog finally cleared

the sun came out

But it did not get warm

The wind blew and chilled the air

Our day is now near its end

Relationships: September Babies and Baptisms

         Four grandchildren were added to George and Peggy Bird‘s list of grandchildren in 1998.  I believe all four were in September.  Three biological and my niece who was an honorary member as Ellen and Kimball did not have cousins on either side of the family before Candy was born.  I think she was the eldest of the four cousins. I know she was the largest.

          Before Christmas, Birds had held their annual Christmas pageant.  Ellen reluctantly played Mary (as the only two other girls at the time were babies) and held one of the twins in her arms.  He was wailing.  I remember someone saying that Baby Jesus wasn’t being very reverent. 

 

Sarah Fitch - LDS clipart

          Corey and I had to excuse ourselves from the pageant as we had another commitment – I don’t even remember what.  Whatever it was hadn’t taken very long, for we had returned in time to see the wise men arriving in Bethlehem.  Ellen no longer held either twin, but had her sister.  I remember thinking how appropriate that was that she had a larger child as Jesus was two or so when the wise men arrived. 

          Fast forward to October 7, 2006.  There was no way all of the Birds could make it to all four baptisms unless all four were baptized the same place.  Arrangements were made for the four of them to be in one building at the same time.  How awesome it was that they were able to share their special day together and no one had to choose which one baptism to attend.

          I would have been in that predicament today if we were in Utah.  Tony had called to let us know our eldest granddaughter was being baptized and had even given us advanced notice in order to make the drive.  But driving to Medford is hard on the body – going to Utah two years ago had really been rough.  

LDS clipart

Jenna didn’t wish to take the time off school.  We can't always go to events or wait for life to stop for those we wish could come.  Tony was unable to make it to Jenna's baptism or either of his brother's weddings.  In a way I wish I was closer to my grandkids, but I really don’t know them.  I have lost touch with the boys.  Life seemed to get in the way (for them – even in Utah – for Tony anyway.  I suspect if we did live in Utah that Biff and Claire would be living with us instead of the in-laws and life would be more chaotic)

          My sister had told me that her oldest boy was scheduled to be baptized the following week, but that seemed to change at the last minute to today.  So of course we would have probably gone to Ester’s out of obligation and perhaps to my sister’s house afterward though I know I would be wishing we were at my sister’s house to begin with.  I am just closer to her children than I am to my own.  Roland says he misses the boys, but it’s not like he’s ever been close either.  I think that’s one reason they all seem estranged. A “Cat’s in the Cradle” (here) type thing. 

             Our youngest son now lives in New York.  If neither one of us had moved to another state, I suspect I would know his oldest daughter the best of any of my grandchildren.  I would have had more opportunity to spend time with her.  And I suspect I would have taken her on bus trips and she would have gotten to know her generational cousins.  But alas I am in Oregon.  I am breathing and I am happy.

                Each day Roland will ask if I’ve checked the mail if he hasn’t already checked it.  I know there have been times when he has been expecting a check or medication or something else.  I wondered what it’s been he’s been searching for lately.  He says he had found the address of his eldest daughter and has sent a letter each month and has been hoping to receive a letter from her.  I doubt she lives on her own.  She is probably not getting the letters if she still lives with her mom – though her mom has poisoned her mind against having anything to do with Roland.  Too bad.  I doubt that he will ever hear from her.  I hope I’m wrong.