Journal Entry

            For the entire month of December, I had a problem sleeping.  I couldn’t get comfortable.  I’d stir.  I’d wake up.  I don’t think I ever slept for more than five hours during one night – and it was NEVER five hours in a row. I was even watching accounting videos and still not having success with my sleep!

            This month I am experiencing the opposite.  I can’t ever seem to wake up – not do I want to.  Right now the rain is soothing to my ears even though it’s pounding on the rooftop.  There is something calming about it.  I like to sleep.  I enjoy being restful.  But I’m really not restful if I have too much sleep.

             I finally got my speech turned in for my communications class, but I did not have a good experience with making the video or uploading.  The rain is louder than my voice has been this month.  My entire week has reminded me of Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day here.   

         I managed to get meaning out of some of the talks given in General Conference but was obviously not focused on many others.  I’m grateful for the Internet that provides me with an opportunity to review what I have missed. 

            This week will be my last filling in for the position I had accepted back in January.  I was told that someone will be starting on Wednesday.  I have been told that in February and March as well.  Perhaps this third time will be the charm.  Roland wants me to apply for a bookkeeping position and will be doing that the following week.  Don’t know where I will go from there.

Homographs

Same Spelling, Same Pronunciation

Bark is the outside surface found on the trunk of a tree.

Many dogs produce a sound called a bark whenever someone approaches his territory

To court someone is the same as dating.

A court is a place where legal actions take place.

Both basketball courts and tennis courts consist of an area with marks and nets which contribute to a sport.

A courtyard is the area or space between buildings that surround it

To flush a toilet means your sending the water in the bowl into the sewer.  A flush in poker means your cards are in sequence.  

Iron is a source found in meat, some vegetables, and beans.  We need iron in our diets. 

Sometimes when working out, people will refer to lifting weights as pumping iron.

Some water pumps are made of iron - or were.

When we press our clothes, we use an iron. 
Some golf clubs are referred to as irons.

Being kind to someone is treating that person with respect. Kind is also another word for sort or type.

Maroon is a reddish-brown color that some may pass off as purple.

Maroon is a feeling of abandonment or being deserted. If my car runs out of gas when I am on a desolate road in the middle of nowhere, I feel marooned.

I just recently learned that maroon is a British term for fireworks associated with signals.

I may point my finger to indicate direction or item.  Children will often point to the words as they read them.

A point is a tip such as a pencil or a mountain.

Sometimes point can mean the highlight of a statement.  Do you get my point?

When I am looking for fruits and vegetables in the supermarket, I will find them in the produce section.  Another produce means to create something like a movie.

Punch is a drink made from fruit.  It has a different meaning from hitting something (or someone) with my fist.  Punch is also a hole made by a tool such as an awl or a hole punch

Relish is a condiment made from chopped pickles.  Relish is also treasured enjoyment.  I relish the thought of celebrating life with my family.

A type represents an assortment or class of interest or sameness.  To type means hitting the letters on your keyboard with assigned fingers.

Yarn is a heavy thread that is used to knit blankets and crochet sweaters and such.  To tell a yarn is to exaggerate a tale.

Trying to Erase or Fix the Confusion

I seem to have such a hard time waking up and staying focused – which I’m certain my readers recognized with my last post.  Perhaps I should just delete it and start over.

            In August of 2018, I had applied for a teacher’s aide position within the school district.  I had been interviewed at three of the five schools but was not hired through any of them.  Instead, I stayed on as a substitute which gave me the option of filling in for aides at all five schools.  Turned out to be a good fit as it gives me more options and flexibility.  At least it did.

            My first assignment was at the end of September.  I had accepted a position at the middle school.  It was a very positive experience and I had been grateful for the opportunity.  The next day I was filling in for somebody at one of the elementary schools.  I referred to it as my day from hell.  I was not a happy camper.

            One of the aides asked if I would ever come back.  I said I would – though it would not be my first choice.  I had filled in for another aide at that same elementary school and hated it even more.  I no longer accept positions at that elementary school.

            I was not given an opportunity to work at the other elementary until the end of October.  Out of the three schools I have been accepting positions from, this is my favorite.  I can now honestly say that I have put more hours in at this elementary school than the other two schools combined.  The two-week assignment that I had accepted in January has turned into the duration.

            I still have three more classes before I complete my online schooling.  Right now I am taking a class in public communications.  My first-week assignment was to write about a confrontation in the work situation and how I would go about handling it.  Initially, my mind had taken me in one direction than what I ended up writing about.  I briefly mentioned the fire drill and “for-real” evacuation in this post.  From that, I took the importance of having a walkie-talkie on me at all times.  As I am quite low on the totem pole, I imagined the coordinator giving the speech to me.           

            My week-two assignment was to start a speech that I will give for this week.  At first I recorded all the details that happened with the fire drill versus the real evacuation.  I only needed 400 words.  I think I had over 2,000 and so had to cut it down quite a bit and leave out all the details. I should be practicing my speech right now, but my throat has been sore.  Currently, it is raining very hard.  I think the rain is/will be louder than I am.

            It’s been raining a lot.  So often when it is raining outside, I am feeling hot inside.  That doesn’t even make sense to me and yet it really does happen.  I’ve been sleeping well.  Perhaps too well.  I find it hard to get myself up.  I think the weather must be draining me somehow.  Or maybe it’s my daily routine at the elementary school.  The time doesn’t always move as quickly as it used to.

            The internet on my computer seems to reflect my tiredness.  It comes and goes.  Mostly goes.  Spaces out while I am trying to do something – or listen to something.  The internet will “doze” or just cut out and go to sleep.  Maybe that’s what’s making me tired.  For example, I was listening to some songs on YouTube while I started this post.  The internet cut out and I am too sleepy to express anger or frustration.  I’m tired.  And my day hasn’t even started.  I may be taking a nap pretty soon.

Tired and Frustrated

My laptop gets internet

My PC does not

No cloud communication

For quite a while now so

What’s the point?

I started a two-week assignment

January 31 to February 13 –

And I’m still there

A few have asked if I can work

For them

I said “Yes” to one and the boss asked

If I could work longer

Yesterday I had others ask if I could work

May and June.  Their boss (our boss) said “No”

She wants me to continue with the

Assignment I started in January

I have to give a speech this week for

The only class that I am taking right now

I am so glad there is only one.

It was tough taking two classes with work

I know many people work full time and go

To school full time.  I think I

Could handle it once

Not anymore.

I wish my PC was more vibrant

I wish the screen on my laptop was bigger

I wish my house would clean itself

This is a boring post and I

am drained.

Dash #36: Transportation

                I'm certain that I have over 80 posts in which I had used public transportation while living in Salt Lake City.  There is also a high volume mentioning driving or the car itself.  There is also an entire post dedicated to water transportation here.   Amusement rides may not count as transportation as they are thrills.  Riding trains at the park or the zoo takes passengers around - sort of a tour - in a circle back to where you started.

             

            My first experiencing with riding a passenger train (I'm assuming AMTrack) came when I was about seven or eight. My cousins had moved to Denver, Colorado for a couple of years and my mom and grandma had taken me and my brother, Patrick to visit for about a week I guess. I don't have many memories of the train itself, but I do remember going through tunnels.  

          As a child I thought it was really cool to be moving through a tunnel - particularly when it was a long one.  I also remember meeting two elderly ladies on the return.  They had each given me a carnation.  One was white and one was blue.  I had them for about two months before they withered.

            I have also ridden in carrier bus lines such as Trailways and Greyhound.  In fact, In 1987 I had taken one of the last Trailways bus back to where I had served my mission.  When I returned, it was on Greyhound as Greyhound Lines had bought out Trailways.  I remember my feeling of uncertainty as my ticket was for Trailways.

            I've ridden guided horses but have never used one as a method of transportation from getting from point A. to point B.

            My first time in an airplane (or at least that I know of) was either one summer during high school or shortly after I graduated.  PSA (Pacific Southwest Airlines, apparently a subsidiary of American Airlines; I learned that as I created this post;  I honestly did not know that PSA is still in operation) had a special for a round trip ticket to San Francisco and back.  It was only fifty dollars.  If I had waited a month, I would have gone on Delta which offered the same deal the following month.  

            Of course there have been several times I have San Franciso when I have used the cable cars or B.A.R.T (Bay Area Rapid Transit).  I remember two riding the BART two specific times.  Both times I had gone to another city to attend church.  The first time was in Martinez where my uncle (one of mom's brothers) and his family lived. The second time I went with a group of students to Lafeyette.   

            I have also been in a hot air balloon.  My brother, Corey and I paid our own way to have a ride.  We both thought it had been a waste of our money.

            I don't think I've been on a helicopter before.  Never ridden in an ambulance or fire truck or police car.  I've ridden in a cargo elevator.  It's not that thrilling.  I've been on the tram at Bridal Veil Falls outside of Provo, Utah. I don't remember if I took it up or down.  It seems like we had Grandma Mary with us and she took it both ways.  I think I took the Tram up and walked back down.  Hard to say.

            I've ridden on a ski lift located somewhere in park city.  It was during the summer months.  I think it is clever of them to utilize the lifts for another season.  I went with my family to ride the Alpine slide which I mention in this post

note: that is NOT my family though there are photos that exist.  I just don't happen to know where they are at the moment.

            I've ridden in a limousine once. It was on the day of my father's funeral.  I think that was the only time.  Roland rented a U-Haul - not quite a semi, but definitely larger than a pick-up truck.  I was a passenger in that.  I've been a passenger on a dirt bike, motorcycle, tractor pull - oh, I did ride on a flatbed truck.  It had been used in a parade at Ricks college.  I was sitting on a bale of hay and when the parade was over (and the rig was moving a little faster and uphill, I might add) I could feel the bale of hay slipping beneath me and thrust myself forward onto my stomach and the bale of hay went flying off the truck. I was grateful that it wasn't me.

Thank you, Emily Freeman

Emily Freeman and David Butler host a series of YouTube videos designed to assist with the “Come Follow Me” program.  Last week’s reading offered different accounts of the story of the loaves and the fishes and of Peter walking on water. I love Emily’s example that she shares about her son, Caleb (sp?) and am touched by the messages that have been shared here.

Spring break is over.  Jenna finished her time off with a bang.  She’d invited several of her friends to the theatre to celebrate her birthday playing games and pizza.  It appears the majority had fun.  

A Six Syllable Word

When I was younger, I remember my Aunt Trudy using the word "discombobulated".  I knew the meaning had something to do with a state of confusion.  I did not recognize this as a real word, however, as I have never heard anyone ever having used that word before except for Aunt Trudy.  Then just a short while ago when I was watching a rerun of the Match Game.  Tom Bosley had said that he felt discombobulated and it sparked a memory.

I think the word itself is funny to hear as it sounds as if it was just made up by one in a "discombobulated" state.   Research tells me that the word has been around since the late 19th century.   Aunt Gertrude was born just 21 years after the start of the 20th century.  She obviously knew people who had been born in the 19th century who were still using that word.  I have been curious to know about where it had come from or why it was said. 

From one site (here) I learned that it is suggested that the word started out as a playful and nonsense word that somehow caught on during its time.  Does anyone else know of anyone who even says it anymore?  This site provided nine comments.  I have chosen two definitions to share:

It's a slang (originally American) word of unknown origin that goes back well over a century. Probably just a fanciful alliteration of discommode, discomfit, discompose, etc.

It certainly doesn't derive from some pre-existing word combobulate. I think normally you'd be understood if you tried to use that 'back-formation', but I don't think it will catch on.

comment made on 8/20/11

and

I can not speak to previous answers. My opinion is based on personal experience. I first heard combobulate/discombobulate(both terms) in the late 1940s from my 60-year-old grandfather, when I was four. On being asked, he could not recall its source.

Several days later, he came to me with a crumbling old letter he had received as a very young boy (mid 1890s), passed down from his grandmother. It was dated in 1823 and written by his great grandfather, and it contained the word combobulate, meaning (from the sense in which it was used) “to make order”.

At the time of writing it, the elder gentleman was in his mid-60s, so I am left to presume that the term goes back a good deal further.

7/28/15

If the word truly does interest you, you can also check out this site.

Change & Responsibility

          For many of us change is a difficult thing.  We change instructors each time we advance a grade in school.  Our insurance doesn’t allow for a certain expense and we change doctors as a result.  Death always creates change.  We must deal with the void in our lives.  Some do this gracefully.  Others may complain.

          Often, we are asked to accept responsibilities that we certainly hadn’t stood in line for. Some of the responsibilities accepted force us to grow in ways that we may have not otherwise understood.  Take my brother, Corey, and cousin, Michelle for example.  Both had been placed in situations regarding finances attached to an estate.  Corey took over what Patrick had been assigned to do initially.  We had all voted on it.  Patrick seemed the logical choice.  He could have easily cheated each of us out of our inheritance but we all knew that he would not. 

          The day came long before my mom passed.  Corey and Patrick had worked together – each having the power of attorney.  I don’t know that Patrick even wanted to be in that situation – even long before he was asked.  A long time ago - when we had put it to a vote.  I don’t think he voted for himself.  Corey was a teenage kid with little to no tolerance for math.  Patrick had been experiencing health problems and didn’t need the burden. When Corey took over he was obviously more prepared than he was when we had taken the vote.

          When Aunt Gertrude was in rehab we all told her that she would need to update her will.  She would have to give power of attorney to someone eventually.  She picked her two surviving nephews and finally gave in to finding an attorney.  I had heard her oldest nephew didn’t want the responsibility and passed it on to his youngest daughter – though it sounds like Michelle has picked up most of the pieces.  Aunt Gertrude Uncle Ted outlived all three of their nephews and a niece.  Aunt Gertrude outlived Uncle Ted.  He was 100 when he died two years ago.  Aunt Gertrude passed just this year.  She was 97.

          I know that at least three of my cousins have a hard time dealing with change.  When their father passed, it was very hard for them.  She has had to deal with quite a bit of change: Aunt Trudy’s deteriorating mind and physical condition, Uncle Ted’s health, his death, Aunt Trudy’s death . . . I think the experience has made her a stronger person. 

          We all have trials that can make us strong if we allow.  Change doesn’t have to be a horrible thing.  It’s all a matter of perspective.

Dash LF #12 Friendships

        

If you could pick a best friend and your true soul mate from the world of fiction and make them real, who would you choose and why?

      In the classic series "Anne of Green Gables" there is an amazing friendship between Diana Barry and Anne Shirley.  I would love to have a friend like Diana who is always there to route for Anne and love her for who she is.  Diana is more attractive than Anne but does not allow her good looks to interfere with her loyalty.  She is kind and respectful and will keep confidences.

      I would have loved to have a friend like that - someone who has been there for me no matter what.  I have had friends, but not solid friendships like the one between Anne and Diana.  I would pick Diana.

Dash #17 Places

          The thing I love most about living in Myrtle Creek is the close knit community - people who care for one another and express concern more for people than things.  The first couple of years we lived here, I was able to breathe much better than I did in Utah.  I still believe that I do but I haven't done well with the extremely bogus weather we've had.  8 months of no moisture to two weeks of cold and too much moisture -my breathing is not where it should be in my opinion.

          I love living in a relaxed atmosphere as opposed to an uptight bustle.  But I have made no secret of this.  Several of my posts have explained this already.

Oh, the joys of technology.

Though my communications class started on Monday, the lecture isn’t given until Wednesday morning.  I am not able to attend the live session when I am working and cannot listen to the recording until after I return home.  The instructor does have a question-answer period on that same day but I don’t want to just pop in and start asking questions she may have already covered in the video and yet if they are not covered in the recorded lecture, I have missed my opportunity for asking live.  I feel like I am working with a two-edged sword.  I don’t like it.

Our initial discussion post is due on Wednesday, but I like to have it done by Monday or Tuesday.  Sometimes the discussion doesn’t get covered in its entirety anyway.  Thus I did post what I had written based on what I read.  But I had missed the point of the assignment and did not get that turned in until just several hours ago.  There was something mentioned during the lecture that made me realize I hadn’t read the expectations correctly.  I had also missed having to contact the writing center two or three times before I decided to turn it in.

What?  I have to use the writing center to complete this assignment?  It’s been required for at least two other classes and has always been a traumatic experience for me.  Always!  I was never able to keep an appointment or was always late getting in because I have never been able to connect to Blackboard collaboration right away – even when I had believed that the tech at the school had fixed it for me.  Every time I go to sign on, it asks me to download it into the system.  Every time!  Shouldn’t it already be there? 

So my appointment was scheduled for 4:30 MDT yesterday.  I attempted signing in just before 4:00.  Download.  Wait.  Connect.  Really?  I got connected?  I still had twenty minutes before my appointment.

I was told that she had just finished up her 4:00 appointment and I was welcome to start my session early.  I was hoping that she had access to the document I had submitted at the time of my making the appointment.  My computer and laptop haven’t been communicating as usual and I couldn’t retrieve the document from either device.  The assignment hadn’t been saved to my laptop (though I had used the cloud) and my pc seems to be at a frozen stage whereas I am not getting any icons to click on nor does the search allow me to type anything.  Roland thinks the keyboard is the problem.  I don’t see how.

Falling Into Place

            It's uncanny how much of my life or programs will fall into my path during courses I am taking, and I can use those experiences or episodes to tie into school discussions or assignments.  Take this week for example.  I have just started a class in communications and public speaking.  It started on Monday.  It was the same day that at least one of the elementary schools in our area had a fire drill.  I know this because I was there.

            Yesterday the fire alarm went off again. Word came over the walkie-talkies that "Everyone needs to be out of the building. This is NOT a drill."  Some of the students heard that, but not everyone did.  The drill took place during class.  The more serious threat was during lunches.  The children were safe.  I suspected that the fire was not a major fire but more of a trash-fire although I had no way of knowing for certain.  I personally had not heard the word "fire" but had heard one of the custodians requesting a need for the fire department.  It could have been a bad chemical in the air.  I didn't know.  I tried to focus on the comforting the children with positive thoughts.

            Rumors get out of hand on face-book and fires spread more quickly on social media than the flames near the faulty outlet or the smoke traveling down the hall.  Parents panic and make the situation worse when they hurry to the school to and demand to check out their students right now.  They are only making it worse for the emergency vehicles that need to get through the safety of the children that need to be accounted for.  None of the parents had been contacted about the fire drill that we had on Monday but all of them seemed to know about the fire trucks coming to the school in response to an actual emergency.

            The kids were safe.  The educators were safe.  There was an orderly manner of conduct - though perhaps not as smooth as it had been on Monday.  Still, everyone had been accounted for and were allowed to return to the school in under thirty minutes.  Parents need to learn to trust the system.  Hey, I'm a parent.  I have a student who's been on lockdown more than once.  She has been a part of fire drills, earthquake drills, and more recently intruder lock-down drills.  And I have trusted the system.  I know that my efforts to contact the school will only interfere with or delay the safety of my child.  I need to have faith in those who are with her and in a higher being.  Things will work out the way they're supposed to.  I feel blessed that I am not afraid.  I am grateful to all the educators who stand with our children and protect them.  I have always been grateful to the firefighters - especially in this area where I currently reside.  Most of them are volunteers.  

            They went into the school. They took care of the situation at hand.  Everybody is fine.  Well . . . I know there are parents who are not fine.  Perhaps they will never be fine.  Fire drills are a way of preparing for a cause or event.  Perhaps the parents should practice understanding the system and make it a priority to have a bit of faith and not panic! I have more appreciation for walkie-talkies and other devices of communication.  This week and last month have helped me to prepare.