I Write For Me

           So often I will write down my thoughts as I ponder over the scriptures.  I write them down in hopes I will remember.  Sloppy cursive that I can’t always read.  I certainly don’t expect anybody else will. 

          Sometimes I jot down ideas when the computer isn’t available.  I plan to transfer my thoughts into something legible.  I still have many ideas stored in a folder for blogging reference.  Most of the time it gets ignored or else I move on from whatever thought I had.

          December 17 for instance.  I had looked up articles featuring Tik Tok and the disturbances it can cause.  It’s said that a fourteen-year-old was arrested for his part in upsetting the school systems and law enforcement who assisted with the safety of the students throughout the nation.  Two weeks later I still haven’t put it all together.

          I write for me.  If someone else can feel something because of my words – that is just a bonus.

Define Your Dash #1

     

            In September I created this post about "Dashes" and how they're to be defined by each of us as we write our memories that spell out our life.  One of my goals this year was to answer one of the dash questions once a week until I got through all 52 of them.  But there are actually more than 52.  Twelve topics provide twelve questions each here though only 52 are highlighted here.  5 each from 6 topics and 4 each of the remaining 6.  

            Some I have already answered without the intent of answering - they just all happen to be subjects that I've posted about.  So I will "define my dash" with some dash questions and some others that I picked up from journal jars or Relief Society handouts (assigning random numbers to the ones not suggested on Family Search.  Mix them up a little.  No order to what I pick - I suppose most of what I've already posted defines my dash.)  But once a week, I will do it consciously.

            I would also like to add a poem or a thought on a particular word (or words) as I did in these two posts (here and here).  The word goal is for twice a month. Those are the goals I have for my blog posts for this year.  

Overwhelmed

          As I have already mentioned, I had started two classes on Labor Day this month.  One in managerial accounting and the other in financing.  My accounting class seems like a refresher course as there is some familiarity within the topics. It also feels like a prequel to my financing class and I wish I had it BEFORE my financing class and not side-by-side as I tend to get the two mixed up and have actually turned in one assignment for one class into the other.

          Fortunately I have really good instructors in both classes who have been able to give me feedback right away instead of waiting until the end of the week as was the case with my last instructor who did announce ahead of time that his grading day is Sunday and that is it.

          I am having the hardest time with the subject at hand.  Valuation principals and investments and blah, blah, blah . . . One class asks me how a manager makes a decision (no, it isn't my managerial accounting, it's the other one . . . see what I mean) and so I look up all of these references for one class and end up using them for the other class.

          Most of my accounting assignments have been in excel and so I don't have to have all those references in my back up file.  When I am asked to write about a personal finance decision (wrong again - the 300 word project about personal financing is for the accounting class; it is the second part to be handed in along with the excel assignment) I am looking at all these words and definitions trying hard to apply it to my personal life, but they're all business words and I am not a business and I have absolutely no desire to be!

          We make estimated guesses.  We cannot predict the future.  We can't control what downfall the economy may have to endure due to natural disasters.  I have so many thoughts in my head and they are spilling over.  I don't like the riled up emotion I feel when I am trying to answer the questions.  Roland has always been able to separate business from personal life.  Not me.  I cannot keep my emotions out of it!

          And then there is the scrapbook I had gone through that has triggered all sorts of thoughts.  I knew I couldn't sit down and write just one post and do my assignments.  So I broke my thoughts into several posts that still managed to beg for me to write them - and hey, why not?  I couldn't focus on my assignments anyway. I'm not worried about failing the class.  I've been getting As the entire time except for one class - with an instructor who would pass out virtual caramels - I was late turning in an assignment and so did not get full credit.  I think I was taking two classes at that time also. 

          I feel fortunate that I had only one class in July and one class last mod.  I don't know how I managed with the two classes that started on the day of Jeanie's funeral.  I felt like I had been in a coma for three weeks.  Perhaps that is the secret - have my subconscious take over.  I just felt so tired I don't think it was possible to experience emotion.  Since school started for Jenna, I've been neglecting the library also.  I find it necessary  to take a breather.

Lots and Lots of Thoughts

     My head is so full right now.
I'm tired.
My fingers will never catch'
up to my brain.
I've written thoughts about
the library but have not
posted them.  I've taken countless
amount of pictures that
I still haven't viewed.
I finished my algebra and
entrepreneurship on Saturday.
Two more classes started Monday
but I haven't . . .
still . . .

I've done the daily checkpoints
and started a research for my posts
which will need references.
Right now I am just way too tired to
comprehend anything more.
We returned to Myrtle Creek about
three hours ago.  I feel the tiredest that
I have ever felt in my life.

For those who read my post on a regular basis,
you know that it contains a hodgepodge
of thoughts and posts.
You ain't seen nothing yet . . .
  I've got more
tucked away in my brain.
I would like to write and post them all.
They will not be chronological.
I can guarantee you that.