On Feb 14 I created this post. My sister-in-law’s visits with my mom were positive and full of conversation. My visits were not so uplifting. And then mom became Mr. Hyde for each of us. But now she’s seemed to take on this happy drunkard personality with a desire to travel – and in her mind she has. In her mind she has done a number of things that she would have never even considered just five years ago – such as sky diving.
I have actually never experienced a conversation of where she’s been and what she’s been up to – but apparently she has told my niece and nephew-in-law countless stories about having gone to Russia, Hong Kong, China, and South Africa – all within the last ten years (she has been out of the state, but not out of the country – unless it was with a tour group in the early 2000’s)
Occasionally my niece and nephew-in-law will take her with them to my brother’s house for Sunday dinner. Corey was with the rest of the family when mom related her “sky-diving” experience.
The conversation started out with reminiscing of sky diving events that had already taken place in real life with my oldest niece and nephew. Their younger sister was unable to go because of age or lack of money. But after having watched Ellen and Kimball experience the thrill of falling out of the plane, three other family members have been saving up money to experience the same thrill.
Apparently my mom chimed in with a story of her own as she has also been skydiving (my mom has never sky dived in her life; she doesn’t even enjoy certain rides at the amusement park as her legs are dangling. There is absolutely no way she would ever go sky diving! She cringed at the very idea of Ellen and Kimball doing it.)
And so the family allowed her to speak without correcting her. Some smiled as she did so. And because the events were so real to her and she was able relate with details, Sunny said that even Corey seemed to question whether she had actually gone or not. She must have fallen asleep during some war movie where they were jumping out of airplanes or was watching a documentary or something.
My grandma has been to China. Maybe Russia – I don’t know. She really did go on several tours and saw many parts of the world before she died. I don’t know if my mom got her own life mixed up with her mothers or if she has started to watch the travel channel or if she has exotic dreams or what.
There was a time when Jenna’s visits used to wear her out (I think Jenna’s enthusiasm and loudness has wiped out just about EVERY family member) but now she welcomes her and calls her cute and crazy.
I don’t know if it’s her blood sugar or in the meds that she’s taking or if this dementia is somehow gratifying her because so many desires have apparently been fulfilled in her mind. But it just makes me worry about her all the more – for I know there are times that she is alone – and it’s okay if it’s the television that takes her away – maybe not the best thing – but certainly better than having her walk out the door and not knowing where she is.
We’ve called the police on her a few times – one time they found her (that was just before we took her license away) and a few times kind strangers have brought her home from wherever she happened to be. We need to set up the alarm system so that she’s unable to leave unless someone is with her.
Thanks to the police and all of those who have spent time assisting us with my mom. Thank you to the firefighters who continue fighting the countless amounts of fires. My mom used to keep herself updated on all the current events. I wonder if she even knows about the fires – or if she’s completely missed the boat on them because she’s been having all these global vacations.