Beneath the Wraps

I wondered which one of us (me or my brother Corey) would post about Harold first.  I came up with most of these thoughts and typed them in by 1:00 am this morning - but only drafted it as I had no title. Last year we (my sibs and I) put mom into an assisted living program as she was in need of 24/7 care.   This time last year she was trying to escape.   She wore her coat and carried her purse and would walk around the doors and windows of the facility – looking for a way out.   She wasn’t happy there – not all the time anyway. By mid April, mom had accepted her new home and was reading everything she could get her hands on.   She didn’t retain anything.   But she did read. I don’t think it was until May when she developed an attraction to Harold and soon the two became inseparable.   I find it interesting that Corey created this post on June 3.   Mom has a boyfriend.   And just one month later I created t his pos...

Ever since I have given up driving, I haven’t made the time to go out and see Harold – mom’s boyfriend of five months or so – though I have written to him.   I sent the last letter on the first.   He just got it yesterday. Jenna happened to be off on Friday, and I found a way on public transportation that would get us close to Alta Ridge.   But our pass expired on the 31 st and I wouldn’t be able to get a new one until Roland got paid.   Jenna suggested that we go visit him after I picked her up from school on Thursday – but I knew that unless Roland was willing to pick us up from Alta Ridge that we would never make it home before him.   He told us to wait on our visiting Harold. It was really too bad as the weather was so awesome on the 31 st .   It was snowing when we left the house yesterday.   Jenna and I both wore our snow boots, It turns out we really didn’t need them. By the time I left Jenna at her school it had stopped s...

Many of the staff members referred to him as “the Lady Killer” which I thought was a euphemism for womanizer.   Until he started telling me of his other “love interests” who had each passed away (and now mom) I didn’t realize that “Lady Killer” was really a metaphor for “the Angel of Death” I asked him if he was.   He just laughed. He said there was one he developed an interest in before mom – but she wasn’t ready to die and chose not to go with him.   But when he found my mom he found her true beauty.   They were inseparable – until the fall . . . He knew she was dying.   And Madge knew.   The only two residents that are fully aware and haven’t seemed to slip into any kind of dementia stage.   Apparently they had both been in other facilities but felt overwhelmed and asked the family to put them somewhere smaller. Madge’s family had put her there due to her constant falling.   She knows the code.   She says all one h...

The other day I went to see my mom.   There were several senior citizens gathered around the TV ready to watch Harold’s recorded plane ride.   He had ridden on a bi-plane just a couple of years ago.   His ride was filmed from the ground.   The camera man had lost the plane for just a few minutes.   Sometimes the CD itself would freeze.   Harold told us that when the plane was out of view that is when it would be doing its loop-to-loops.   I don’t think so. He also would like to ride a glider and jump out of an airplane.   The jumping will not take place.   His doctor says he’s in good enough health – but Harold is hunched over and if he lands the wrong way it could paralyze him.   So realistically he has decided not to attempt that one.   He would still like to ride on a glider though. I learned that his last name is Mull as Desa (the activities coordinator) kept on calling him Mr. Mull – which I thought was o...

             Mom embellished on her “sky-diving” story – a bit with the realization that jumping out of an airplane is something she would never do.   In this version it was from a commercial airline with mechanical problems.   Mom said she didn’t want to, but it was the crew that had forced all of the passengers to jump.           Harold told his story about going up in a stunt plane that did loop-to-loops.   They had fastened video cameras to each wing and had one in the cockpit.   This filmed every move that was made and then the three films were spliced together.   Harold said he had it on video tape.   But that it does tend to make most people sick when they watch it because it’s like being there.             Corey had explained to the family that there are seven stages of dementia and th...

Today I read a conversation that took place between Corey and my mom.  She's upset that the workers at the facility seem to be sticking their noses into her affairs.  She wants her privacy and doesn't want the world watching her through open windows or open doors.  Therefore she keeps the blinds closed and leaves the door to her bedroom closed because she doesn't want anybody watching her.  Those who do are perverts.  And she swears when she returns to her room to find her blinds have been open.  Evidently she used the word "damn" in almost every sentence she said to Corey this afternoon. Evidently Harold is NOT her boyfriend.  He is an old man.  Mom doesn't even call him Harold anymore.  He is that guy.  He is old enough to be her father - so she says.  I learned that he is twelve years older.  Mom is on the younger end of those who reside at assisted living.  Harold's physical health seems to be far worse than mom's ...

Whenever the Wind Blows When I fall asleep I sleep quite hard Whenever the wind blows Slumber invites me Into worlds beyond this one When I fall asleep My eyelids become heavy My thoughts are put on hold Whenever the wind blows My husband can’t believe How quickly I drift off When I fall asleep How the trees dance And leaves often fall Whenever the wind blows There’s a calm cool breeze That surrounds me but I miss it When I fall asleep Whenever the wind blows                                                                                  ...

--> I we nt to Alpine Ridge where mom is staying.   I was surprised to see Harold sitting on her bed and visiting with her.   He was saying that he has six boys – while mom has only four children – two girls and two boys.   But she claims to have a lot more pictures than Harold. I told her I had come to take her to a family dinner – but we had time to visit before we left.   Jenna’s eyes lit up when Harold mentioned Peanut Brittle.   He said he had been in a place before this one and they let him make peanut brittle in the microwave.   But one day the microwave started smoking and they never let him in the kitchen again.   And then he had to move. Jenna absorbed it all – hanging on to his every word.   I decided that his mind works the same as mom’s and his time frame is different as well as some of his facts.   He said he wanted to take mom flying – not that he’s a pilot.   He wouldn’t be driving the plane, but would...