Of Course It Was Expected!

                The weather seemed to be the perfect temperature during Bill and Kayla's visit - except for the last day which was cold.  We had a few perfect days since until Tuesday and Wednesday.  Unbelievable Heat Wave.  Roseburg broke a record of 90 degrees on the 25th of April.  How dare it be warmer in Oregon than in Salt Lake!

            We had watched the news to learn of how much longer.  We were told that yesterday would be hot but not as bad as the last two days.  The next week predicted a drastic drop in temperature and rain.  Of course, we'll get rain.  We can make that happen just by putting up our A/C.  At first, Roland was just going to do our bedroom, and wait to install the A/C in the main room.  After watching the news, I thought he might in the bedroom, but he ended up doing both. After he had placed each one in the window, he turned them on to a nice cool temperature.  As it turned out, we didn't even need them on - well, at least not the one in the bedroom. 

            I don't know what the temperature was outside, but I'm certain that the cool winds made it feel below 70.  In the morning it was 66 - three degrees lower than Salt Lake - that has been a first for a while.  But Las Vegas has always had blazing temperatures.  How miserable for Corey to be there.

            I shut off the bedroom air and put up the windows because it was less costly, not blowing on me directly, and not as noisy.  When we retired to bed, we could hear thunder - a noise I have not been greatly familiar with since we moved to Oregon.  I did not hear any rain, however.  There is rain now, just a light one barely tapping at the skylight.  It may have been lightly tapping all night.  I didn't notice as I was asleep - except at one thirty when I retrieved some blankets I had folded up earlier and thought I would need them again.

            I got up and closed one of the windows and added another cover to the bed as I figured Roland was cold.  This morning he thanked me for the blanket and asked if I had gotten cold.  No.  I was comfortable.  I left one window open.  Neither had been open wide.  Each was just an inch or so.  That was enough.  Now they are both open.  Still not that wide.  I am comfortable with whatever temperature it is now.   

Oregon or Bust

I will be 60 when Jenna graduates from high school.  I have often wondered if I would actually live that long.  It’s not that I consider 60 so old as to have a foot in the grave.  It’s my raspy breathing and hacking that has made me question my state of health.

I watched my father slowly die for two years – which really isn’t a long time when I consider what others have gone through.  The memory of a loved one’s death lingers with you no matter how sudden or painful.

I have always wanted to move away from Utah – well, maybe not always – but definitely after I got married.  At the same time (even if we could have afforded it) it would (and will) be so hard to leave my family members – knowing I would not or will not be able to afford to return often as there will be new births, deaths, Christmas, birthdays and other celebrations.  And yet if I stay in Utah and continue to breathe this dry air, I will be miserable and my family members will remember how hard it was for me to breathe during the final stages of my life.  I don’t want people to remember me like that!  I’d rather be healthy and far away and correspond through modern technology although I’d prefer in person. I would prefer to breathe.

I didn’t plan on five days making such a difference, but it did.  I could breathe so much easier in Oregon – and though I still had some of the phlegm, it never built to chocking me.  It came out right away.  My unpleasant sounds weren’t as long or as often.  The wind blew at times – but never knocked me into a coma.  

By moving to Oregon, I feel like I have bought another ten years of my life.  I will not only be able to see Jenna graduate from high school, I may see her get married and have children as well.  And I will be able to enjoy it if I am breathing.

Both Roland and I wear glasses.  In Utah, we are constantly trying to wipe them clean.  Often (to me) it feels like I am doing it in vain as the gunk seems to return in less than a minute.

I packed a huge amount of lens cloths for our trip to Oregon.  We didn’t even use them.  This is the air I have breathing and the air that I will breathe.  I have to move.  I don’t want to suffocate on my phlegm.  It’s looking promising that, if I stay in Utah, that’s how I will die.  I’d rather spend money on a move than on doctor and hospital bills.

I can be buried in Oregon when the time comes.  It’s not like Roland and I have purchased plots here, and I don’t think it’s a wise investment on the part of my family to have my body shipped.  And it’s okay.  I seriously believe I am buying more time to be.

Hartman: For All of your Contracting Needs

            No, I am not getting paid to advertise.  For heating and air conditioning I had always used Gils.  Gil comes out and gets the job done and no need to call back because the system works and they don’t leave glitches.  They’re reasonably priced – inexpensive even.  But it’s just a father and his son.  They don’t finance.

            We called Hartman when our furnace seemed to give out.  They had serviced our furnace before.  I hadn’t remembered, but it was Hartman’s paperwork tacked to our furnace that hadn’t been serviced since two years before we moved into the house.

            As I was waiting for someone to pick up, I started playing with a switch on the side of the furnace.  Apparently it had been knocked into last time someone had been in the closet to retrieve or return the card table or step latter.  The heat went on, but as it had been seven years since the heater was last serviced, I made an appointment and asked to get a bid for Central Air (Gils had given us one, but were quite booked during the summer and quite overworked I am guessing.)

Hartman’s bid was just a little above Gils – only they could finance – which could be done over the phone.  Sorry Gil.  I really do like your service.    We won't forget you.  You do a great job! But I just wasn’t comfortable paying it all up front at this particular time.

Hartman was to our house bright and early yesterday. Though our furnace and water heater were both working, Roland and I realized that their days were numbered as our furnace was 35 years old and our water heater was 15 – which I understand is 3-5 years longer than normal.  Mineral deposits may have kept it alive.  At the same time I think may have been solely responsible for sucking our water pressure as the water pressure we have now is so much better.  Who would have thought?

I never looked at our relic furnace and water heater as blessings before.  We have been major blessed that neither had gone out on us – or our tenants before us.

Hartman does plumbing, electrician, roofing . . . Last night the plumber was here making things right.  He told us what a good company Hartman is to work for.  Thus far, I don’t have any complaints.

Thank you Jason, Stetson, Julian and Jim for making a difference already.  Summer will be so much bearable.  And we will definitely use you again.  Especially for the electrical part, I’m certain – as we know only a few electricians and they are PRICY!!!  I bet they don’t finance either.  And you do seem more reasonable with your prices.

Could be more thorough with your communication skills, I think.  As with many big companies, often the right hand doesn’t know what the left is doing.  But everything has been resolved (at least we hope it has) and for that we are grateful.

Looking for Answers in the Skies

     Randy helped Roland put the A/Cs up on Memorial Day.  Roland had wanted to do central air, but the cost would have been more than remolding the bathroom (and getting a new tub – which is I wanted – but not the entire expense all at once) Three fires and still just barely getting by on Roland’s check.  

     Ten more days and Pamprin will be eighteen.  No more child support – well except what the stupid state is suspending from his paycheck on the two years that Roland was UNEMPLOYED – and what’s the point of fighting it when the lawyer may end up sucking more out of us than Maleficent did (still does)  Still we should notice an increase in his paycheck – at least I hope.

     It was 88 degrees in our city yesterday.  Roland had looked it up online.  He said there was a difference of ten degrees from what his family members were experiencing in Tucson.  It wouldn’t be so bad if the climb or drop in temperature was gradual, but it’s not (and hasn’t been) 

     62 degrees.  Bamm now 88.  Bam, oh we’re back to 40.  Gradual would be 62, 62, 63, 65, 64, 66, 67 . . . . I wish the temperature would just stay between 66-72 all year long.  I really don’t like these constant 15-25 degree jumps!

     We had the air on last night.  It often dries me out.  But I can’t stand the heat.  So my choices are to wake up dry (often with a headache) or not even sleep at all due to the heat (which I am actually surprised hasn’t killed me off)

     It’s that time of year when laundry has to be washed more often than once a week – particularly the tops and bras.  I’d just to braless if there wasn’t so much weight in my sagging chest – but they are needed.  I don’t own any air conditioned underwear.  Thermals were invented to keep us warm – where is the underwear that will keep us cool?

     Yesterday was hot!  Deadly hot.  Okay, perhaps calling 88 degrees “deadly” is a slight exaggeration (especially when I have lived through some ugly three digit temperatures) the 20 degree jump just makes it feel deadly.  And now we’re back to an indecisive sky.  Will we have rain? Will I need my sunglasses?  I’m not taking my umbrella.  It will be worth getting wet (should the sky choose to rain)

 

     Well, those were my thoughts this morning.  I could feel the wind.  I put on long pants, but changed my entire outfit before we left the house.  It hadn’t even been an hour since I dressed when the top of me was soaked!  It was gross. 

     I don’t pick Jenna up today.  On Wednesday s after school, she takes a charter bus to her practice for the 5K that she’ll be running on Saturday.  Today will be her last day before the run.  And she’ll be out of school next week.

     Today is my birthday and she made a power point card which she showed to me this morning.  I’ve always had access to power point but never used it.  My ten year old showed me how.

     I’d like the skies to rain.  It has rained on my birthday before.  I had taken Jenna to the doctor that year.  Tomorrow I will be taking her back to the dentist (initially she was supposed to have six teeth pulled but three came out on their own)

 

Google wishes me a happy birthday each time I sign in.  Facebook friends and others have sent me wishes – but only Google has said “Happy Birthday, LaTiesha” 

   

     One of my visiting teachers came and got me and took me out to lunch.  That was a surprise.  She took me to a place that I had never even heard of before.  Good food.  Good company.  It was nice to visit with her.  It makes me feel like I’m not a very good visiting teacher though.  I’ve never done that for any of my sisters.

     The day is not over.  It hasn’t rained.  Perhaps after I put my first load on the line.

    

    

Racked Nerves

          I am usually not pressed for time – but on those few days that I do need to leave – well, those are the days my mom would like me to stay.  And it would be all well and good if I actually lived closer – or with her.  But I don’t.

          We’re down to one functional car – and even that has been questionable. 

          Since Roland works late on Wednesdays, he drove the car in and so I borrowed my son’s car in order to get out to mom’s.  Talk about nerve racking.

         

          First off, it has a quirkiness to it that anybody but Biff might not get – and the fact that other people have trouble turning on the ignition is actually a great feature in Biff’s opinion.  I was just about to give up, when I actually got it to turn.  I don’t know how.  But then I worried – if I did make it all the way to mom’s and it was time to leave, would I be able to start it again?

Biff’s car would make clicky sounds – even when I hadn’t put on the turn signal.  I was only part way to my destination when it dawned on me that I didn’t think Biff has car insurance.  Oh, great!  As if I wasn’t already neurotic about the whole thing.

          And then, I parked across the street from my mother’s driveway (as there was a van in her driveway) and pulled out the keys from the car and the radio continued to play.  I didn’t know if that was normal for Biff’s car.  I turned it off so that the battery wouldn’t run down.

Mom’s air conditioner was being worked on – a good portion of the day – I might add.  She was hungry.  She wasn’t satisfied with anything in her fridge and asked the worker how much longer he’d be.  At least another hour.  She told him that she was going to go get lunch and that she’d return before he left, but if not, he could just lock up.  Just a few years back, that would have been so out of character for my mom to do that.

We went to a drive-in just at the end of her street.  And we did return before he was finished.  (I think they should have sent two guys instead of just one) and I actually had to leave before he did – although he was packed up and ready.  Biff left for work shortly after I returned.

          I noticed a luggage tag fastened to mom’s purse.  Corey had posted some personal information on a bright pink card.  It may let others know her medical situation and contact information in case she gets lost again. I don’t like this “old timers” mental state at all. It is more irritating than Biff’s car.

Some of the Places where my Mind takes me

          It’s time to get my hair cut – or at least thinned out.  I feel like I have a heavy scarf draped over the back of my neck.  I have been pulling it back – but some days just don’t seem to matter.

          We’re down to just one car.  Jenna and I have to get up in the morning to leave by 6:30 to take Roland to work.  Jenna stays in her pajamas, wears slippers out to the car, buckles herself in, lies down and throws a blanket over herself. 

          Roland turns the heater on – I usually turn my side down before we arrive to his work (one nice feature which still exists on the car – passenger and driver can adjust to different temperatures) I shut the heater off before completing the journey home.

          We return home one hour before I take Jenna to school.  By that time I have the A/C on.

          Biff and Roland put up the A/C in our living room the other night (on Biff’s birthday actually). We’re expecting rain now.  It always rains after we put up the A/C.  Though yesterday seemed unbearably hot, it’s been quite overcast today.  I see several people out in their yards working – pulling weeds, planting.

          I went out to see my mom.  We used to be rivals when we played word games like Scrabble or Upwords.  Mom was a sore loser, but even a more prideful winner.  It was all in fun. 

         

          That was then.  I continue to play games with her in order to stimulate her brain, but there is really no point in keeping score anymore.  No longer do we share our playful competiveness.   She seems to have lost interest in how to keep score and doesn’t bother looking for points so much as just getting rid of her letters. 

          Seems I need to work harder at getting her to smile or understand a joke.  And we have all repeated ourselves almost as often as she has.  Very little seems to stick with her anymore.  This change is hard on everybody.  And there are some of us who have questioned as to how much longer until I am in her shoes.  (I often wonder if I’ll be there tomorrow – for real)

          I’ve been searching through tapes and taking glimpses of home movies – not really that far in the past.  My mom is more put together and aware of things even just a few years ago more so than now.

          My niece and her husband live in the basement.  They don’t have their own private entrance.  Seems “grandma” is forever locking them out.  And so my niece has learned to always have her keys on her – even if she is just in the yard.

          Just as the weather changes, so do our lives.  Sometimes we can revisit where we were – but often we’re forced to move on or ahead and don’t have the capability of revisiting – not even in photographs.

I am a Summer Scrooge

          I don’t mind sunshine.  I can drive when the sun is out and lighting my path.  There are a huge number of summer activities that I do enjoy.  I just don’t care for the heat.  I would rather have it cool.

          April hasn’t even ended, and already I’m changing my perspirated drenched clothes two or three times a day.  What am I going to do in July?  If it’s above 72 degrees I am an ogre. 

          Even the dog is panting after hours of sleeping.  Our walks now have to happen before school.  Just two weeks ago it was midday because it was too cold in the morning.  I think if the weather were to change gradually (maybe just one degree every other day) it wouldn’t be so bad.  This 20 – 40 degree jump has got to go.

          I enjoy having an A/C and fans.  I like the coolness of water and being splashed. I would still rather have the crisp air of fall though.