Fluff and Flowers

I am a visual person

I like parables, analogies,

crashcourse videos,

mnenomics and pictures

The fluff and flowers

help me remember.

Whatever I'm trying to learn

will make more sense if

I can compare or have

an image in my mind.

Roland seems to do better

without the fluff and flowers;

he can read a wordy textbook

or listen to a person ramble

on and on during a lecture -

the more boring or over my head

the more he understands and

vice-versa.

He has the talent to read the

wordy textbook and dummy it down

to my level.  I don't have the

talent of taking all the fluff and

turn it into 68 words instead of just five

so that he will understand.

We're two different people.

Time Goes By Quicker in Oregon Than in Utah

        I can't believe how quickly this year has gone by!  Winter Break will take place during the two classes I am currently taking.  It doesn't seem like it's been too long since the last winter break.  I know a few months have gone by, but not 12!  Not even 10.  Only one month left of 2017. What the heck?  How can the year have gone by so quickly when there were so many spurts of activity that almost seemed/felt endless (here and here for example)

Jenna painting ornaments

        Last year I had participated in a posting class offered during winter break - students shared Christmas memories and recipes.  I remember one recipe for salt dough ornaments, and made up some batch for family home evening, but waited until yesterday morning to cut out the dough as the recipe suggested a four hour baking time, and I knew I wouldn't want  to be checking the oven after 8:00 pm let alone 10:00 pm.

        Thus yesterday morning Jenna and I twisted candy canes and cut out various cookies from our cookie cutter selection.  The twisted candy canes did not turn out as I had envisioned.  Nor did the gingerbread men I was hoping to look like decorated gingerbread man and not what was supposed to be an incredible hulk and what I had seen as a missionary. 

        The ornaments are not finished.  We all got tired of painting after a while (I think Roland only painted two) and have put on a top shelf for another day - only we need to hurry more quickly if we plan to send them out.

Except for the deer, these are the ornaments that

I worked on.  Will post them all when completed

        Jenna wants to go and see Coco.  She will have to clean her room - whether we see Coco or not.  But we will definitely NOT be seeing it if we don't see an improvement. 

 

Too Many Words for a Discussion Post

            Yesterday I started two new classes in addition to a grant class I'm taking for the library.  The two classes I'm taking currently delve into personality.  I have a feeling my head will fill faster than my fingers will be able to keep up. I've taken intelligence quizzes before - even before I started taking classes online.  I see the growth in my answers.  The instructor made the suggestion to look at where we were ten years ago and where we are now emotionally.  This is what I've written - but feel that it's too long for the discussion.  Even if I reference myself, I don't have anything to put in APA form as a reference.  So I'm posting it here - although you may have read it all before.

            Ten years ago I walked with my three year old daughter to the school.  We took many walks around not only our neighborhood but my mom's neighborhood as well.  Jenna was enthusiastic and eager.  I loved seeing the world through her eyes.  I'd often volunteer assisting in her pre-school classroom.  I needed her. I needed her radiance.

            I did fine with her one-on-one, but was often an uptight individual around other family members.  Roland had two other girls whom he was suppose to have visitations with every other weekend.  I was tense whenever they were there - nothing against the girls themselves, but rather their psychopathic mother that made my uptightness feel as light as whipping cream.  I would cringe at the very idea of her existence.  I was happy if I just focus on Jenna but not happy overall - if that even makes any sense.

            I've been married for over 16 years now.  During that time I have lived in four different houses.  We saw the girls (occasionally) when we lived in the first house. Two of our boys had to leave whenever they came.  That wasn't right.  I was angry and I was sad.

            We moved to our second house when our two youngest were out serving missions.  The economy (along with Roland's ex) had been unkind to us.  We were there when Jenna finished kindergarten up until the 5th grade. We  would walk around the neighborhood, to the bus stop and to the school. I had encountered many sinus infections and dizziness while living in our second house.  I blamed the low ceilings. I tried to be happy but wasn't really.  All three of the boys married while we were living in our second house.

            Our third house was a rental in Oregon.  It seemed to have better ventilation than our Utah houses did - more windows, higher ceilings.  My breathing was better.  There's very little in the way of traffic here.  Don't see or hear about crime in the county as we did living in Salt Lake. Jenna and I would go for walks around the surrounding neighborhoods.  I was a much happier person than I had been in Utah. I miss my Utah family members.  There are always pros and cons.

            We are now in the forth house since being married.  I started taking online classes shortly after our last move.  Jenna is now a teenager.  We take walks around the park.  We talk about subjects that we take in school.  Still miss my family and public transportation, but overall I am in better control of my emotions - I think.  I am healthier - therefore happier (or maybe it's the other way around?) and I like who I am - which hasn't been the case for a really long time. 

            The air has been cleaner.  The weather more consistent.  I am discovering myself through many of the classes that I have been taking.  For me personally, that means more than any degree I may obtain or job I can find. 

            I believe I will have more to add as the weeks go by, but don't know how often I'll make the time to post to my blog as I should really be focusing on my classes first.  I still have to create two discussion posts (well, maybe just one and a half as I did start one yesterday, but have not completed or posted)  still trying to figure out how to connect the words I do have . . .  

Christmas Cookies and Charlie Brown

cookies created on Wednesday Nov 22

                Jenna had invited two of her friends over to hang yesterday. Roland had made cookie dough the night before so that her friends could roll dough, cut into shapes and decorate when they came over.  Jenna was very excited.  She and Roland went to the store to pick out cookie decore and Jenna was quite selective making certain that none of the candy or frostings contained any nuts or nut oils as one of her friends is allergic.

        But both had given excuses not to come and so at 7:30 this morning, Roland rolled out dough while Jenna and I cut out the cookies.  After they were baked, we started our decorating.  About 2/3 were complete before Jenna and I got bored and decided to play games for a while.  We also watched "The Muppet Movie" and "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown" As we watched "Charlie Brown" I reminised over a few different stage versions I had seen.

        I saw "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown" for the first time at Promised Valley Playhouse in Salt Lake City.  All I remember was the old man (possibly the age that I am now) that played Charlie Brown and the exageraated props like the sandwich the size of the adults' heads and pencils the size of arms.  Certainly made it a lot easier to see than an actual pencil.  "Charlie Brown" was colorful.

        A few decades later, Corey took the role of Charlie Brown in Hillcrest High's first (and perhaps only) dinner theatre.  I was reminded of that yesterday when Jenna and I watched "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown" animated version.  I mostly thought of the stage version that Corey had been in, though my mind wandered to Jenna's performance and thought how fun it would be to make some photos of Jenna and Corey side by side doing the same scene. 

        She had been sick the night that the cast had performed which very few people knew;  she did a tremendous job covering it and made a b-line for the bathroom just as Uncle Bill was taking pictures of each member of the cast.  Photo session was through.  I went into more detail in this post.

        We'd invited a couple over to spend Thanksgiving with us.  she has to work all holidays and so we are not eating until six.  Roland had asked Jenna how she would like to spend this day.  She said she would like to play games. We played only one game of Jenga. After Jenna and I had started a second game, Roland decided he needed her to learn to make the turkey - which is still in the oven.

        After Jenna and I had cleaned up the kitchen a bit, she decided that we needed to make graham cracker houses.  Her's turned out cute.  Mine was pretty slum looking as I was making it.  She made me take pictures before she decided we'd eat them, 

yesterday's cookies with build houses

but I wasn't hungry and so she ate mine and hers is still standing.  Roland is watching cowboys until it's time to eat.  He doesn't feel well.  Coming down with a cold - which is probably my fault.  I like having the windows open.  He likes the heater. Jenna is the one who normally gets sick on Thanksgiving. Roland sounds like Barry White whenever he gets a cold.

We Need to Work Together

                I guess I could have gone into more detail about Danny's class.  As I mentioned, there were fourteen children in the Valiant class alone - four of them boys.  I have never seen more than two Valiant boys in class since I started attending the ward in Myrtle Creek.  After the opening prayer, Danny passed out scriptures to each child - part of a scripture anyway.  Seven children had the names of a book found in the scriptures.  Seven had a chapter (or section) and a verse.  Danny asked why none of the children had looked up the scriptures she had handed out, what may have been the problem - when it was decided that each of the children had only part of scripture, Danny asked that they check the paper and find a partner that had the other half.

            I was impressed how each of them actually worked together and didn't try to trade scripture pieces in order to sit with those they had sat with initially.  After the seven scriptures were read, Danny asked what they all had in common.  They all had to do with service.  We then watched a short video about some of the things the members had to do to establish winter quarters.  Danny asked what some of the things were and made a list on the chalk board: plant food, chop wood, build cabins, tend children and animals, prepare food, make clothing, blankets, shoes, etc.  There were eleven answers given - including the fort itself.  Danny then passed out paper and told the children they would have a minute to draw all of the things listed on the chalk board.  Ready, GO!

            Now not only am I NOT artistic, but I am such a smart aleck, I would have attempted to draw the fort and tell my instructor that all else listed on the board was behind the fenced area. 

            Most of the children attempted to draw everything in the order it had been written.  One girl said she managed to draw seven and one said she got all eleven of them - but they weren't very good.  Danny then asked the children what would make it easier for them to draw all of the pictures.  Most were in agreement that more time would do it, but Danny reminded them of the scriptures they had read on service and how each could contribute his or her part but that nobody was expected to do all of it.  She then assigned each of the children to draw only one thing from the list - assigning the fort to the last three (as there were more children than suggestions) and that made it easier.

            Her last activity (or object lesson) was quite similar to the one I had mentioned here only instead of kisses she had passed out dumdums and larger rocks. 

            Two of the girls were wearing sandals - as though it is still summer outside.  They had more complications of just trying to keep the rock in their shoe rather than walk on it.  Only half the children were aware of the pain the rock had caused.  Most enjoyed their dumdums and were able to tune out the discomfort.  It was a good lesson.  Danny always gives good lessons.

I'm Allergic

                 I came home with a headache yesterday.  I still don't know for sure what caused it, though I have a better idea.  Our youngest beehive attends primary before Young Women's starts.  She had been picked to introduce and conclude the primary program.  I noticed she had been wearing make-up; perhaps she was wearing perfume as well.  That is one plus about being in primary - usually my allergies don't react as the children don't tend to wear it for the most part. I can't say for sure as I have lost the majority of my sense of smell.  I'm guessing a sweet perfume.  Those fragrances I think smell best are the ones that irritate my sinuses the most.

            The stake primary president was visiting as well.  Perhaps one of those sisters had been wearing a perfume - though they were all on the other side of the sliding wall.  But I've had a reaction to chrysanthemums from far away - I would rather not be in the same building as chrysanthemums. 

            Poinsettia and mistletoe.  Most Christmas plants, actually.  It's a wonder I'm not allergic to the tree.  Or at least not the ones my family had purchased in the past. I suppose that would be another contributor to my lack of desire to shop around the holidays.  Candles, aerosols, car fresheners.  I do okay with vanilla and fruit fragrances.  But honey, if you don't ever want me hanging around your car, may I recommend Jasmine.  That should put me in a coma for a week at least. 

Cleaning chemicals, dust, dirt, smoke, ragweed . . . I seem to do fine around plastic or silk plants.  Even several roses brought indoors seems to be too much for me.

            If it isn't the fragrance irritating my sinuses, I have many skin allergies as well.    What a Wimp!!!

The End Result

          Primary programs seem necessary, but I loathe practicing for them.  I always have. As a child, my primary day was on Thursday right after school.  I was then a part of the Midvale East 4th ward.  I can remember on days when it would snow, an announcement would go over the intercom: there will be no primary for such and such a ward.  Never did they announce Midvale East 4th would be cancelled - not even once!  And some days we were faced with more severe snow!  I did not appreciate nor understand it at the time.  I have since thanked my former primary president for her love and devotion.

          However, practicing for the primary program, for me, was worse than crossing the street in the snow.  Though I do enjoy singing, I did not enjoy practicing them or keeping still or staying reverent while others took their turns. I would actually play hooky from primary and hang around the school playground until I believed that primary was over, and then I would walk home. Becoming a primary teacher hasn't changed my attitude toward practicing for the primary program - in fact I believe my attitude towards it has worsened.  Hooky doesn't come so easy as an adult who is trying to set an example.

          I don't know what happened with the primary program last year - why it didn't seem planned for.  I think we only had one or two practices.  I remember our chorister felt stressed about it.  We avoided that this year with five practices.  Last week we practiced on the stage.  Last week I was in a horrible mood. Sitting between two boys that can't keep their hands off each other.  Emily was very reverent.  She was moved to the middle between two other boys in order to set an example.  I watched our youngest primary boy in the corner doing his own thing.  I know I shot him looks of disapproval that the Savior himself would not have done.

          I woke up about 3:00 this morning.  I could feel a headache - though I don't know why - unless it was from the mistletoe I had encountered on Friday (because I had  a headache that day too) and told Roland that if I still had it by the time church started, I would not be participating in the primary program today after all (Oh, darn it all)

          This week I prayed to have a better attitude and better experience.  Last year wasn't bad. There are some really good primary programs and many that we're grateful that they have some to an end, like this one for example.  Today's program went rather well.  Everyone who could see them were impressed (those sitting four or five rows left of the podium did not have a tremendous view - if at all;  the floor plan adjacent to the stage is not the best I've ever seen - plus the fact that we don't have an overly large primary)

         

http://www.lifesjourneytoperfection.net/2016/11/all-you-

need-for-2017s-lds-primary.html#.WhH2crpFycw

          I smiled at Christopher instead of shooting disapproving looks.  Joseph sat between us and felt amused by some of Christopher's four-year-old behavior.  Sometimes I felt myself smiling with him.  The program went 1,000 times smoother than any of the practices had.

          Danny taught the lesson.  I saw the subject had been on winter quarters and thought: "How in the world does one give that lesson in just 25 minutes?"  We had been told to cut class short today because we'd be watching a movie as a reward for having performed the program.  In addition to the children in our class who had taken part in the primary program, we had a few visitors besides.  It was funny to see the look on the primary president's face when she walked past the room to get a head count of how many children there were. 

          "Oh, my word!" she let out.  It's true.  We had fourteen children in our class alone - which is probably how many children we had on stage.  There had been at least eight in the other class.  They were given ice cream to eat while they watched the movie.  Our primary room isn't accustomed to 22 plus how many ever chairs.  Some leaders were sitting, but it appeared that most were standing.  Not me.  I'm  really not claustrophobic, but I didn't want to be smashed into the primary room

I decided I'd go to Relief Society.  My headache was back.  I still don't know why.  I left the church house and arranged for Jenna to be dropped off by one of her leaders.

          I am grateful that the primary did well on their parts and song.  I'm grateful that I didn't have to have my headache on the stage and I was able to drive myself home.  I still have my headache.  I was hoping it would be gone by now.  Perhaps it's psychological.   I missed my niece's missionary farewell this morning.  I heard that Tony and Rochelle represented the family.  Of that, I am also grateful.

Not Your Average Teen

          Our swim instructor retired from teaching in public education but has agreed to substitute on occasion.  She happened to be subbing for one of Jenna's teachers and had mentioned to me how Jenna is well liked by so many of her peers.  She is admired because she is herself.  She hangs on to the things she likes and disregards things she doesn't like and refuses to play games of "following the leader" unless she's the leader.

          There are several times that I've called Jenna "crazy" or "weird" referring to her personality differences and not necessarily with Jenna herself.  There have been a few concerned about "labeling" - but my family understands what I am saying and in many cases will agree with me.

          Take today for instance: Jenna has an opportunity, along with several other honor students, to go to the cinema in the big city of Roseburg.  They will see "Wonder" which we have read and I think she would like to see, but not today.

          Yesterday a dental team came to the middle school to check the teeth of sixth and seventh graders whose parents had given permission to be checked.  Today is the eighth graders turn. It kills me that she would even consider staying with the school in order to be checked rather than to see a movie.  Man, when I was her age, skipping school alone would have been enough incentive to push me to the movies.  Adding the dentist would have been even greater incentive.  I don't know a child who loves the dentist more than Jenna.  I've mentioned that before.  But then again I would not have been in her predicament anyway as I never received the high grades that she does.

          When she was in second grade, I volunteered to escort the class to Mrs. Cavanaugh's chocolate plant.  That was also the day Harmon's would be doing their food samples at the school.  According to Jenna, Harmon's produced the best tasting oranges.  She was bummed about going to the chocolate plant rather than being present for the produce.  I assured her that we would still be sampling - but it would be candy instead of produce.  She still felt gypped.

          Seriously?  I mean, it's cool that my child actually prefers produce to candy but still . . .  given a choice between oranges and chocolate - I'm going for the chocolate.  When we returned to the school after having spent a glorious day at Mrs. Cavanaugh's, the representatives from Harmon's were still passing out samples and so Jenna did not miss out after all (besides  from what I understand, Harmon reps were there each month or every other month; Mrs. Cavanaugh's turned out to be a one-time thing)

          She says she did get to assist with foot traffic during the dental demonstration yesterday and was awarded a toothbrush or oral hygiene kit or something.  Still, she would like her mouth cleaned by professionals.  Silly girl.  I like Jenna's uniqueness.  I really do.  I'm happy that she lives outside the box and sticks to her guns.  When I use the words "weird" or "crazy" to describe her, it's actually a compliment.

Where Is Our Focus?

            The RS presidency was in charge of the activity.  The theme was on gratitude.  I didn't raise my hand when our president asked for volunteers.  I was helping another sister sort toiletries that we had collected to put in bags to send to the women's shelter.  I don't know how many volunteers she ended up with, but her demonstration didn't actually go as well as she had hoped.

            To each sister (and the two Elder missionaries who happened to be there) she gave each a small rock and a candy kiss.  She told each to put the rock in her (or his) shoe and walk around, but to please enjoy the candy.  The idea was "to enjoy the candy so much that you didn't think about the rock in your shoe."  I'm afraid I would have focused on the rock more than the candy.

            The idea was to be grateful for the good.  But I suppose we can be grateful for painful things as well.  As I heard another sister speak on gratitude, I felt impressed to share this post.  Perhaps I should have just allowed the sisters to visit with one another, but chose to stand and relate a bit about Corrie ten Boom's biography and the encounter with the fleas.

            I try to be grateful for things and focus on the things I have rather than the things that I don't.  I'm pleased to know that many of my posts express some form of gratitude. My I always be grateful and not get upset.  Something to work on still.  

More Important Than the Trade

        I'm certain I must have mentioned in at least one post that in addition to learning a trade, the online school I attend expects their students to be human or humane rather.  I've taken classes in philosopy and economics and have actually shared various assignments because regardless of whether I am to find employment or not is beside the point.  Some of these classes, I feel, have made me a better human being. 

        The video below is one that I have had for at least three different classes now.  I hope it is one that all business majors will take to heart and keep the statitics in mind that we might not have to live another recession - or depression (found here)

Transformation at Millsite

So many times Jenna and I have gone to Millsite, I feel like I am seeing it for the first time.  The elements change and often causes a new feel.  But there has been reconstruction.  A new fence was added.  Trees were removed and new ones planted.  This is Millsite last year, this year in October and on Veteran's Day

Dec 22, 2016

Dec 22, 2016

Perhaps you will recognize some of these pictures from this site    

October 10, 2017

When we returned to the park on Veteran's Day, I took even more pictures

What Do Pineapples and Prayer Have in Common?

(Pineapple Members, 2016)

            Some people are blessed with learning from others' examples.  Unfortunately it seems there are more who just don't get it and have to figure out things for themselves.  Still there are some who go through trials and still appear to be clueless.  Allow me to share an example.

            When I was a youth, I remember seeing ads in the classified section inviting youth to earn money picking pineapples in Hawaii.  The ad itself was marketed in such a clever way that youth believed not only would they be earning money, but would have an opportunity to tour Hawaii as well.  I remember a bunch of Patrick's friends decided to fill out applications and asked him to join them as well.  My brother, Patrick, has always been logical and decided he would wait a year.  If things worked out among his friends, surely they'd want to return.  If things did not work, well, Patrick had spared himself.

            What the classified ads failed to mention was that picking pineapples is hard physical labor. I honestly don't know anyone who returned for a second year. 

(Picking Pineapples in Florida, 2011)

My sibs and I have been fortunate enough to weigh our options, find others with similar experiences and learn from those experiences - especially if we can spare ourselves from pain - be it emotional or physical.

            I realize that is not the best example of what I am trying to convey.  I'm certain there were many that may not have appreciated what they had gotten themselves into at the time, but may have had a deeper appreciation for the experience they received - though maybe not at the time.

Mareeba Gold, 2016

            Whether we choose to pick pineapples or not doesn't seem relevant to our salvation - not in the same way as turning to drugs or alcohol or something immoral.  Not like joining the service or giving a child up for adoption.  I think the latter examples are more inclined to stay with you and perhaps even haunt you more than the pineapple picking decision would.

            As I had mentioned in a previous post, I am currently reading The Children of Promise series by Dean Hughes.  I am just finishing the third book in the series "Far From Home".  So far I like how he starts each book so if you haven't read the books from the beginning, you can still follow who the characters are.

            World War II is nearly at its end, but the events will have forever changed the lives of those who lived during that time.  Some had been excited to sign up to join the cause - to fight for their country - whatever country that happened to be.  It had been glorified and certainly sounded more exciting than it was.  Even newsreels only touched the surface of how it really was.

            The character named Bobbie writes a letter to her sister-in-law. It is very short.  There is one sentence that really stood out for me - one I think that each of us can relate to:

            "I used to think if I prayed hard enough, nothing bad would ever happen, but now I understand life is all about surviving hard times" - Dean Hughes (1998, p 388)

            I think often are expectations are quite different from the reality that we face. We're not alone.  We can and should turn to the Lord to receive guidance and personal revelation.   Personal revelation is between God and the individual.  There are some who make decisions and appear to have given no thought to the decision whatsoever.  Take me, I agreed to marry Roland after only three days.   I know there were many in my family who thought I was making a mistake accepting a proposal of marriage and now wonder if any of them had felt anything other than apprehension. It had been my personal revelation to accept his proposal.  I was guided by faith not intimate desires.  There was apprehension on my part as well. 

             I know that my brother Corey had a tough go at his attraction to same sex.  As I mentioned in my last post, we all experience being in Gethsemane.  Corey's longest time in Gethsemane was while he was an active member of the church.  His life was a struggle.  He prayed constantly.  He received a personal revelation to embrace his gayness.  Not possible?  Because it goes against what we've been taught.  Of course we're going to question it.  He did.  For many many years.

            Personal revelation isn't restricted to any one religion. After excommunication, he has continued to receive personal revelation and is definitely happier than he ever had been.  Hard as it may be for some people to believe, some people have to leave the church in order to get out of Gethsemane.  Some people have a different mission and because the personal revelation is between the individual and God, who are we to question?  And yet we do because there's always concern - especially when it seems to go against what we've been taught all of our lives. But sometimes Heavenly Father allows us to experience situations that we may not understand at the time, but there is purpose whether we accept on faith or not.

            On the other hand, there are some choices made that don't include the Lord.  Often there is sorrow and devastation, but we can still learn from our mistakes or better yet, from the mistakes of others.  That's why we have biographies and scriptures.  That is why each of us may be called to give a talk and share our experiences.  That is why we fellowship on another - so we may learn from the lives of others.

            Yesterday I read this thought that my youngest son posted to facebook two years ago:

            "The greatest moments of stress people have faced in their lives have led to the greatest accomplishments or failures that brought experience and change. Learning...g from mistakes or looking back on trials conquered is why life is so exciting. Do not live your life scared or afraid. Living with optimism is what makes life great living any other way is not really living. from mistakes or looking back on trials conquered is why life is so exciting.  Do not live your life scared or afraid." 

            Turn the Lord when you need comfort and include Him with big decisions and listen to Him and act upon faith.  Continue to pray and be guided in righteousness.

Credits:
Hughes, D. (1998). Far From Home. In D. Hughes, Children of the Promise (p. 492). Salt Lake City: Deseret Book.

Picking Pineapples in Florida. (2011). Retrieved from clippix etc: http://etc.usf.edu/clippix/picture/picking-pineapples-in-florida.html

Pineapple Members. (2016, December 17). Retrieved from shadowverse: https://forums.shadowverse.com/index.php?/profile/1341-pineapple/

Ripe for the picking, another Mareeba Gold pineapple grown and marketed by Pinata Farms. (2016, December 20). Retrieved from abc news: http://www.abc.net.au/news/2016-12-21/mareeba-gold-pineapple-sweet-success-built-on-flavour/8138354