Always on a Sunday

                When I was younger I would often spin around several times until I felt dizzy and stop – either of my own will or because I had crashed into something.  The dizziness was not completely bothersome as a youth as it is as an adult – an aged one at that.

           There are times I have felt dizzy due to ear or sinus infections though I don’t ever remember feeling so dizzy that I wanted to throw up.  Well, there was that time when I was pregnant with Jaime and Richard and I were at a movie theatre watching “Limitless” – the opening photography is spinning as I recall or maybe somewhere else in the movie.  I remember looking away as it was making me dizzy.

          Getting into a car when I am feeling light headed is not always the best idea. The dizziness had seemingly made me naucious and when we had stopped for gas on the way home I removed myself from the car, threw up and told Richard I would just walk to my mom’s house as we were not far.  I started to walk in the direction of her house.  Richard followed behind me in the car.  I got back in and he drove slow.

          On December 23, 2007 I fell into my neighbor’s nativities because I got dizzy.  It was a Sunday.  On January 10^th this year I discovered an abscessed tooth – how long have I had that?  And yesterday I felt light headed in the morning.  And experienced a scary dizziness that seemed to make the room spin.  I threw up.  I looked up my symptoms.  Probably my abscessed tooth because it is connected to the heart. 

          I keep on telling Richard that abscessed teeth can lead to death.  I am not scared to die.  But I don’t wish to live Jaime and Richard right now.  I think it will be devastating for Jaime especially as Richard will probably leave the state and move in with our youngest son. 

          He has wanted to get rid of Bonnie for some time.  If I were to die Jaime would not lose only me but Bonnie as well.  I love my daughter so much.  I don’t want her to be sad.

          In three weeks I’ll have three teeth extracted from my mouth.  Her birthday is the following day.