What Is Up With Bruce?

 

         Bruce is not the only rooster who crows or comes into our yard.  I don’t know how many there are or why they crow.  Perhaps they are boasting about planting seed in their harem of hens.  I know they don’t get returning to standard  after six months of daylight.  But still.  That accounts for only one hour difference.  Not five or seven.  Half past midnight I hear the annoying cock-a-doodle and can’t figure out why.  It’s raining.  Is Bruce complaining because his feathers are wet?  Dude.  Take a chill pill and find some shelter.  Don’t just stand in it and complain your lack of understanding why there is moisture falling on you.  I can’t sleep with your built in alarm.

          I got up to relieve myself and checked the clock before I returned to bed.  That is how know it was half past midnight.  When Bruce finally stopped complaining or boasting or whatever it was he was crowing about, I could hear Bonnie snoring loudly in the hall.  She used to sleep in Jenna’s room.  Jenna had even built a temporary door that Bonnie could use to freely come and go without upsetting Jenna’s privacy too much. 

 

Jenna always ends up on the couch.  Even before we started watching Bonnie.  Bonnie has camped outside mine and Roland’s door for the last two weeks.  Her snore is quite loud.

          Roland generally does not snore unless he has a cold – which he has had for almost three weeks now.  Not a terrible cold.  Enter-the-night-when-first-lie-down-to-phlegm-filled-mornings kind of cold.  But eventually clears until it’s time  for bed again.  I told him he could take care of the drainage by sitting up, but he claims he can’t sleep that way.  Sure he can.  I’ve seen him sleeping while planted in front of the TV.  I have also seen him nod off at church.  Pews are not made of comfortable sleeping material. 

          I don’t know that Roland’s snore is louder than Bonnie’s but he is closer so it seems like it is.  I can’t complain because in this marriage Roland rarely snores.  I have been the guilty party.  But everyone agrees that Bonnie has a louder snore.  She evidently also gives off a stench that I am grateful that I cannot smell.

          Back to Bruce who still brings his harem and turkey friend into our yard hoping to get a quick fix of whatever Roland and Jenna should throw their way. They used to run from us whenever we would walk in their direction – though none of them have ever been the target of what we’re after.  Now they’ve gotten gutsy walking up to our porch as if it is their personal domain.  Jenna has captured several pictures of the fowl invaders.

 
          The rain has not kept them away.  And it has rained a lot.  Right this very minute the sun is peaking through.  There are birds in our yard but not as many as in our neighbor’s yard.  They even come out in the rain and approach the porch when they hear someone coming.  Perhaps Bruce 1, 2 and 3 aren’t crowing about the elements at all.  Perhaps they are beggars saying,

          “I have seen all three of you come out of your house now and I just want you to know that I am hungry.  You fed me once which leads me to believe that it is your job to feed me whenever I darn well feel the need.  And if you don’t feed me I will stand here all day and yell at you and make your lives miserable.  So if you don’t want us to crow, send an endless supply of food.”

 The nerve!